The only thing that warms the cynical black splinter of what is left of my heart is the thought of Winston, David and Luxon all having to work together.
If that’s ‘winning’, losing don’t feel so bad.
Watching the madness unfolding with Winston making clearly false statements regarding the Christchurch Terror attack and Mark Mitchell’s demand to make Gang members wear make up to hide facial tattoos gives a glimpse of how dysfunctional this will all become.
ACT will refuse to allow Winston on the cross benches, Winston will refuse to allow ACT on the cross benches.
They will want everyone inside Cabinet to force Cabinet responsibility on the other.
Winston won’t give Luxon his Foreign Buyers Tax because Winston will be destroyed by his own angry reactionary antivaxx feral conspiracy voters who are all xenophobic with a capital X if he does.
ACT voters want real change and will be furious with the measly offerings of more on prisons and demanding 10% of Schools become Charter Schools.
National just want to give their Property Pimps a return on their donations and throwing Tenants out and removing tax loopholes aren’t enough.
Fundamentally this is a Government not supported by the people, it’s a Government made up by voters who hated Labour for their incrementalism.
Hilariously the very same incrementalism will now become a feature of this new Government because the only thing the three of them agree on is paramilitary police and making prisoners suffer.
Beyond that, ACT, National and NZ First have little in common.
NZ First are conspiracy theory rednecks.
National are property speculating pimps.
ACT loves guns and free market virtue signals.
That’s not really much of a bonding philosophy.
This Government is a marriage of inconvenience and I have serious doubts that this Government will go the full 3 years.
Said the joker to the thief
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I think you are mostly right Martyn, however, I think Peters will tow the line on the foreign buyers. His attack on J Ardern is “virtue” signaling to his new found voters, before he tells them that there is no other option. Hell, I’d bet that he has a go at C Hipkins about Covid to build goodwill with them before he reverses his position on foreign ownership of NZ housing stock.
The worst sorts of people, acting for the worst possible interests……….what could possibly go wrong?
The country’s been going in the wrong direction / doing nothing for 4 decades, I can’t see them not going the full term.
Three wise men will make it work.
Where are they Bob? Do they come later? Alternatively if you are suggesting its these muppets does that make Nicola a virgin?
Thanks Wheel your comments reinforce my faith in the three wise men.
At least Wheel makes intelligent observations, you are relying on a Xmas story for credibility regarding the 3 wise men so you might as well invoke the tooth fairy as well for all the good it will do you.
You are welcome Bob. The fact that you hold them in such high regard only reinforces my concern they will be in charge
Bob you really are fucked in the head.
@ Wheel. “Never argue with a fool. They’ll only drag you down to their level then beat you with experience.” Mark Twain.
Unless you find yourself face to face with them. Then, you can really get creative.
I don’t think Winnie will fight to get ACT in cabinet, he’ll fight to keep them out.
Not ‘cos he’s a caring sharing moderate, but because THERE SHALL ONLY BE ONE kingmaker.
The negotiating dynamics in 2017 went like this:
WP to JA: You can only form a government with our support. We assume you’ve already got the Greens, so we don’t want to talk to them, and we will not negotiate with them. That’s your issue to manage, we assume you’ll give them scraps that do not inconvenience our agenda, we don’t care what they are, and we don’t need to know. They will not be in cabinet. If you agree to this we may begin negotiations.
JA: (Still counting on fingers…..) Oh…. I suppose we could technically form a government, what a splendid possibility….
Naive Greens faction(s): These tall things, they look like levers… what do they do again..? What is this power thing you speak of…? Oh… you mean we’re expected to wield it instead of shout at it…..?
Worldly Greens factions(s): Oh look, we are already f****d by our own political positioning… quelle surprise! I guess we’d better try to make something of this based on relationships, given the lack of power we actually have here….
JA: Relationships…. that sounds nice, lets all be kind… eh?
And the rest is history….
I expect history to repeat.
You are wrong.
Winston would demand ACT are in the Cabinet because Cabinet responsibility binds David’s mouth shut. The alternative is ACT sitting on the cross benches. Are you seriously suggesting Winston would give David all the power of the cross bench?
Really?
That’s your claim?
“on the cross benches” can mean a wide variety of things.
If ACT are “on the cross benches after giving confidence and supply for a list of policy wins” they are relatively toothless. They rely on other Ministers to deliver or enable their policies, at a timetable that suits the PM and the general business of cabinet. If they misbehave, their agenda gets delayed or watered down. Luxon can even blame Winnie, and since the discussions are confidential in cabinet, theres nothing ACT can do.
Let’s see how smart they look on Nov 4th once things get real.
Love the article Martyn and especially the cartoon…priceless!…it made me laugh this morning. Thank you.
It would be good to see that cartoon widely distributed, maybe even some large billboards in prominent places
Anyway. What about the pending election within 12-18 months time?
If the world doesn’t get blown up!
It won’t be dificult for Luxon to decide on his next police minister, out of Simeon and Mark Mitchell.
Just send each of them into the Blackpower and Mongrel mob headquarters respectively,
with a tote bag of make-up products from the beauty salon, and which ever comes out in one piece,
can be minister.
If that were to happen, I’d put my money on Mark Mitchell, Simeon looks like he couldn’t punch his way out of a wet paper bag.
Kelly Yep, except that this dumb idea of Mitchell’s renders everybody less safe if the bad boys are disguised with cosmetics and ordinary everyday people cannot see them for the nasty bullying morons that they are. They put us at risk if they enable thugs to go out in disguise. Nor should the police be expected to aid and abet criminals, which is what this is.
Simeon’s smarter. He didn’t make a fortune from the spoils of war in tragic Iraq like the ex-police dog handler did, and neither did Tracy Watkins describe Simeon as a man in the mold of John Key, like she did in her puff piece about Mark Mitchell, which is no more of a recommendation than his featuring in Nicky Hager’s “ Dirty Politics” is.
The Natzo’s the ACTzo’s and the NaZie’s First Party are the same evil thing. They’re all neo-liberal and roger douglas’s neo-liberalism is greed motivated fiscal-fascism. All the pathetic, hollowed out, weak-tea Labournauts can do is orbit the writhing porno that’s now our government hoping not to get splashed with toxic jizz as they fly low over the Grand Festering Fuck-Us-All Finale. Labour are hovering and waiting to swoop in and snatch up a few bucks to pay for their basics. Like their $ix figure salaries plu$ entitlement$ and expence$.
Meanwhile, our vital export funds earning, food producing, primary industry is in ruins, there are 600,000 who can’t afford to buy food and are too fucking dumb to grow their own and lets not forget the 14 multi-billionaires, the 3118 multi-millionaires with personal wealth in excess of $50 million each and now four foreign owned banks stealing away with $180.00 A SECOND! !! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! in nett profits 24/7/365 which they themselves enabled by throwing donations crumbs at the flat feet of our politicL rats looking up from the sewers and gutters they know so well and yes! We are that dumb! We swallowed their scams like gobsmacked Born Again Christians at a God Botherer sing along. Luxon? You’d know about that aye, being a God botherer and all. What was it that William S. Burroughs said about religious fanatics?
“ Never do business with a religious son of a bitch, but if you do, get it in writing. Never trust someone with God on their side to tell them how to fuck you on the deal. “
We’ve all gurgled too far down the plug hole. We need help and since we’re still a member of the British Commonwealth we have every very real right to a Royal Commission of Inquiry into why we few of us on a resource-rich couple of islands are soooo fucked. ( But not you foreign owned banks, multi-billionaires, multi-millionaires and foreign property owners, you’re ok aren’t you. )
Brilliant as ever.
I come from deathly linear-thinking Scots, yet my brothers and I are all big lateralists like you. So, a little bit ashamed of it.
‘Expression’ is the best of language, and so, the best of us. You cut to the quick.
Hang on weren’t NACT supposed to be torching civil society in NZ? Surely incrementalism is a big improvement on that?
All their programme deserves a trailing anchor really. Carrying on as normal over the Falls.
Wouldn’t be surprised if we got an extra 3 to 6 years of comfort out of less fettered capitalism. Thanks, shitheads!
Reality is the first and last word. We can’t deal with.
As the saying goes, too many cooks spoils the broth. With so many shocking chefs, Winston, Seymour, Luxon, Key and Xi, it sure is going to be a right stinker.
Bruce the Moose. You forgot that sociopathic little weasel Bill English. No way Luxon can reform the the health service when Bill was determined that the poor should pay for becoming sick, or when Bill would force women to proceed with unwanted pregnancies and to hell with unwelcome babes in arms, and Bill did his his own best to destroy young men’s employment chances by smearing all our young guys as work shy drug addicts so whoopee let’s import exploitable offshore labourers and keep as many as poss serfs for the benefit of the few. The kids manning the checkouts have greater connection with real life than that slippery double-dipping midget.
I don’t expect incrementalism.
As National’s tax gamble fails to blossom into a full-fledged money tree, they will (with infinite regret and oceans of crocodile tears) scrap the public health system.
Our universities are already on the cusp of collapse – one or more will go.
A victory for TINA and the post-Murdoch feral press.
The wind will howl through the ruins of the decent society.
Stuart Munro. “ …they will … scrap the public health system.” Unfortunately, this has already been partially achieved by stealth, with some services privatised, some vanished altogether, meds removed from prescription lists, invisible practitioners, and Rachel is weeping for her children now. Health and education both underpin the decent society, and while the demise of what were once universities is sobering, the dumbing down of the school system is worse. The outlook is decidedly grim in view of who Luxon’s advisors are. An effective parliamentary opposition could help, but they have been diverted by divisive shenanigans themselves and constructive societal change may have to come from non-politicians.