MEDIA WATCH: National Party 2020 Campaign Launch Review – give me back my 40 minutes of life!

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The National Party 2020 Campaign Launch has just finished and it was a garbled hot mess of whatever National are frantically throwing at the wall in the hope that it sticks.

Anything hosted by Maggie Barry leaves me sick and ill.

Maggie Barry is hosting.

She is listing campaign stats in some hope to gloss over the appalling Poll numbers.

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The background of National supporters is an odd mix of white people who all look like you wouldn’t want to require their help in any situation.

They begin by jumping to different parts of the country.

Boiled Ham Matt King shouts about roads in a pub which sounds as charming as it was…

…what follows is a cavalcade of National candidates who I’ve never heard of all braying about how they can’t afford to stop polluting our water ways and something about blah blah.

This one looks like a group of Ok Karens ready to complain about loud music and funny smelling cigarettes…

…and this one looks like the angriest line dancing glee club in the Southern Hemisphere…

…they then do a panel debate amongst themselves about how great National is.

It’s less interesting than it sounds.

Judith finally pops out and lists a bunch of policies that barely seem to comprehend the enormity of the Covid recession.

They are selling her leadership as strong which is funny because most voters recoil in horror the more they see of her. When Judith wears a mask, it’s to protect the virus from Judith.

Apparently the Crusher nickname she has cultivated and relished over decades of politics terrifies 45+ women who vote National and these voters have all run off to Jacinda.

The bland nothing of the Launch was about telling those older female voters voters that it was ok to come back to National, that they could trust Judith to not be crazy in power, the way she was when she blew Iain Lees-Galloway’s brains out all over The AM Shows studio.

I just don’t think pretending Judith is less dangerous will work as a tactic, you can’t scrub clean in 6 weeks a lifetime of reputation.

Judith has all the bedside manner of a brain hungry zombie on meth, it’s hard to dress that up as ‘leadership’.

The Facebook Livestream never managed to get over 2000 viewers, and at the time of posting had a mere 900 reactions which suggests that the phone is simply off the hook to National right now.

Judith could promise obscene tax cuts while Goldsmith screws up the numbers and no one will care because no one is paying attention to National.

They will be lucky to get in the high 20s.

 

 

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23 COMMENTS

  1. Not the first time Goldsmith has stuffed up. Wasn’t he apologizing earlier in the year for misinterpreting some Govt policy? Something about it was all too confusing and he was a bit rushed. FFS. What a shambles. Strong team my arse.

  2. Do people still use Facebook? I get it still has a lot of subs, but I don’t know anyone that still actively uses it for anything. I never had an account, but I gather it’s the new Friendster or MySpace at this point.

  3. I’m convinced Judith has been in a very fragile mental state the last couple of years, and is on the verge of a breakdown.
    I get that is not your problem, but I do worry about those who supported her bid for leadership.

  4. OMG !!! She’s a re animated zombie rob muldoon in drag! Can you see that? In that first photograph! OMG !
    Her eyes tell me a story… Of two valium’s and a bottle of wine.
    Serves her right the awful, hideous, odious, bully.

  5. Indeed a political train wreck in the making, the Nats’ campaign is ripe for Hollywood and a good laughing comedy film.

    Judith could have chosen a more comfortable and fun way into retirement, why does she do this to herself, I wonder?

    And Goldieboy is learning maths again, he has signed up for a maths refresher with the Open Polytech, I hear.

    • fun way into retirement

      Yes, it’s more a retirement party than a launch, but it’s the sort of retirement party she would prefer under the circumstances, I think. Much better than merely fading away from the back benches.

  6. Tuesday’s leaders debate will be an interesting performance in what is a total yawn. Judith will be pulling out every trick in the book. Hope the PM is ready for the onslaught.

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