Ummmm, about Todd Muller’s maiden speech in Parliament


Look, no one bothered listening to Todd Muller’s maiden speech, because no one in politics should know Todd Muller.

Politically he is a fart in an elevator, you don’t know where it came from, you just want it to leave.

Todd Muller is Joe Biden without the swagger and quick fire articulated wit.

His greyness makes the usual pale male and stale look vibrant and dynamic.

The idea that he is going to save National just seems delusional and a panic move that reeks of desperation from National Party backbench MPs frightened of facing what the rest of us face every day of the week post pandemic – unemployment.

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If the answer is Todd Muller, you’ve asked the wrong fucking question.

Back to the maiden speech, here’s what Todd Muller felt was a worthwhile addition to his maiden speech…

In his maiden speech, the Bay of Plenty MP thanked a salesman who convinced his parents to buy him a set of encyclopaedias in 1978.

Mr Muller said the books inspired him to want to become the President of the United States – despite the constitutional issues involved.

“I even wrote a book as a 10-year-old that saw me elected vice president, become president upon the very unfortunate death of the then-president and then go on to serve 13 consecutive terms.”

…so let me get this straight.

Todd Muller fantasised at the age of 10 that he would one day usurp the democratic process, snake his way into leadership (via the ‘unexplained’ sudden death of the President) and then just rule like an authoritarian king who has declared martial law with the suspension of the Constitution until he dies?

That’s what he wanted to say in his Maiden Speech?

Todd Muller is looking more and more like a House of Cards sociopath with a large unexplained collection of children’s shoes in his basement.

Look, National are going to lose the next election because Jacinda is a phenomena, National could have been led by Ronald Regan, Margaret Thatcher and White Blonde Jesus and National would STILL be polling 30%!

The psychology if the electorate has been fundamentally changed by this universal shared experience, and Jacinda’s leadership through that has been legendary and legacy building.

To pretend a change of Leader will change fortunes is delusional, it will only make National look like spineless cowards desperately trying to save their own skin.

Simon should fight his corner and at least provide some grit and dignity to the looming defeat.

A politically wet fart like Todd Muller as Leader is a surrender flag, not a serious attempt at survival.

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  1. “Look, National are going to lose the next election because Jacinda is a phenomena, National could have been led by Ronald Regan, Margaret Thatcher and White Blonde Jesus and National would STILL be polling 30%!”

    I don’t believe Nationals demise is all about Jacinda. The National caucus contributes massively. Brownlee, Smith, Bennett (or as Bridges continues to trip up on radio)Benefit, Upston, Woodhouse, Tolley, Dean, Young, Hudson and Lee. All past their used by dates. And this is Bridges problem, National need refreshing. And yes while Labour have dead wood and underperforming M.P’s, name any mentioned that have been shining lights?

    • Nope.
      It’s Jacindas star power and the Covid crisis.
      Nat voters especially the squishy middle potential swing voters would vote for a dead sheep in their own interest under normal circumstances- Ardern has achieved cut through to them thanks to the crisis.
      Who National fronts and how they shuffle their deck is thus fairly irrelevant.
      Look at the abject failure tolerated from Clark, Twyford, Nash, Davis any of the main ministers, competence is secondary to shiny leader in crisis.
      Nats best hope is showing the dishonesty behind Arderns shiny brand, standing a good charismatic leader who doesn’t get painted as barking at cars would be the best they can do and I doubt that’s Muller.
      Nicky Kaye is a more obvious choice but as I say it’s pretty irrelevant until/unless the real pain of this crisis is felt and the hypocrisy of Ardern can be demonstrated.
      Strong odds for a Labour victory at present.

      • Yet National are irrelevant, Brownlee was useless, Smith pathetic environmental minister, Bennett appalling social development minister, Collins punative ACC minister and the list goes on. Even Bridges himself called Maureen Pugh useless.
        The dishonesty and arrogance of the National party was evident in Winston going with Labour. This was Winston’s payback.
        Hardly suprising even National supporters are leaving in droves.

        • Most voters are skin deep either the middle or for that matter the partisan left and right.

          Remember Keys unshakeable numbers and no scandal could stick, we are in for more of same this time from the Left but with Ardern now untouchable.
          Unless and until real events overtake the perception.
          Some things I’d like to see from Labour/green but probably won’t: competent government for everybody not favored groups, accountability, real consideration given to civil liberties and erosion by police over reach.
          Diversify away from so much dependence on China. Shut down immigration to a trickle of only the highly skilled.

          In opposition the Nats could remake themselves as a party not owned by China and they would improve their image. I note many right wing voters are concerned at Chinas influence in our politics too.

          I’m expecting none of the above

    • The last legal poll in 2017 was 44 per cent National to 37 per cent Labour. It would seem to be unlikely that Labour would lose the September election.Daily Blog readers will continue to support the imposition of a police state and relaxed laws for cops to enter homes and a massive boost in unemployment The reality is the transformation of Zild as a One Party state is not complete yet.Some foolish fascists think that things are not going swimmingly 😉

  2. Todd Muller looks like the kind of guy who used to make a poor living selling life insurance in Edgecombe but isn’t doing so well now. I hope he wins the leadership challenge and makes that toxic toe rag Paula Benefit sit in the back row.

  3. “Look, National are going to lose the next election because Jacinda is a phenomena, National could have been led by Ronald Regan, Margaret Thatcher and White Blonde Jesus and National would STILL be polling 30%!”

    And not while Labour is being led by another Mahatma Ghandi.

  4. Nationals demise; – another National sideshow is in play now, in a desperate attempt to capture the media stage again and suck the oxygen out of ‘Labour’s sails’- but the glory of the ‘media queen Jacinda’ is just far to compelling to let National into the limelight again.

    Sorry National; – you are a stale fart for sure.

  5. Todd Muller sounds like the Democrats Joe Biden.

    National could get a rush of votes when the China Communist party get’s it’s soldiers back though NZ’s border.

    I hear National advertise non stop in the Chinese Herald widely believe to be a propaganda site for the CCP.

    “Experts have identified the Chinese New Zealand Herald website as a propaganda outlet for the government of China.

    However, the news outlet’s co-owner, NZME, says the Chinese NZ Herald is not beholden to China’s media guidelines and censorship requirements.

    An investigation by Newsroom, with the help of China propaganda experts, found the news organisation’s operational structure, and its Chinese state internet and security permits, amounted to the news site coming under the supervision and control of various Chinese Communist Party (CCP) authorities.

    Experts who spoke to Newsroom said this meant the news site’s content is subject to the Chinese state’s censorship regime, and is part of the CCP’s United Front Work operations – one of former Chinese leader Mao Zedong’s, and now President Xi Jinping’s, so-called “magic weapons”.

    Maybe they could generate some more cash by selling it’s list MP seats off to “more valuable” donors.

    Chinese businessman Yikun Zhang’s donations go beyond Simon Bridges

    Southland mayor in China with ‘$100k donor’

    Good news is that

    John Key assures the public he is not linked to the Panama Papers scandal

    Money laundering is not really a crime in NZ anymore, if you are Chinese or well connected. Jail for Kiwis and Aussies for money laundering, no jail time for huge Chinese moneylaunders, (or even a criminal conviction.)

    Court of Appeal tosses challenge to $5.3m money laundering fine for banned finance director’s company

    William Yan’s aka Bill Liu’s secret deal with China in $43 million money laundering case

    Queen St money remitter discharged after laundering Polish and Russian crime syndicate’s cash

  6. “Jacinda’s leadership through that has been legendary and legacy building.”
    Jesus, that’s laying it on a bit thick isn’t it?
    She and her colleagues simply did the jobs we pay them to do and they achieved success because they used their common sense while we AO/NZ’ers recognised [their] use of common sense and fall in step in step by using ours.
    Legendary and legacy building…? Just a little bit of sick.
    Re the natzo’s.
    The national party are imploding like they were designed to do.
    Jonky slithered out under the back door to leave to work for a bankster who’s one of four who steal $6 billion in net profit out of our economy annually and leaving the traitorous cocky muppet bill english to set the explosives in the short shape of a mini dictator but without the personality to steer national into a tree.
    The reason I write that with such confidence is simple. Look at the natzo’s? Look at them? They’re rich, they’re bored and they’ve colluded with labour’s traitors to the point where by there’s nothing left in the public purse worth swindling. There is ACC I suppose but I think they missed their chance there so they’re going to have to let that particular fush slip off the hook.
    Now that we have a cow pat politic that’s just dropped out of rich, dirty arseholes all that’s left to be achieved is to steer AO/NZ into a Republic without the bananas then the zionists who’re skulking about on Pacific Islands will swoop in on us, then we’re fucked.
    Is todd muller like a more bald, less orange donald trump?

    • Countryboy, they are after Fonterra… still a sizeable corporation to privatise to multinationals and get them that 5th mansion and gold curtains in bonuses… they have sold everything else I believe offshore in NZ, Tegal, Wrightsons, Convita, Silver Fern Farms… waste management even…. If it ain’t nailed down in NZ, it’s able to be sold offshore for a peanut or two…

  7. Niki Kaye is the right choice for them to have a chance to upset cinders run.

    So they’ll probably pick the munter from ‘wherehecomesfrom’.

    • My daughter regularly served Niki Kaye in a clothing store in Wellington a few years ago. The sales people all disliked her because she was so disrespectful and treated them as if they were insignificant nothings. I’ve always thought you can tell the quality of a human being by how they treat those who have less status than them. I also find inauthentic people really repugnant. I have that reaction whenever I see her now.

      • Yep I have not idea where Niki Kaye’s so called echo chamber popularity is coming from. I know a Natz voter than asked for her help in Auckland Central, zero help from her office.

        If the Greens and Labour were not so stupid they could have got Auckland central electorate – combined they got more votes than Natz…

      • Wow! That’s saying something. Looking down on the essential worker. That is how the rich see the ordinary hardworking people. Jacinda all the way.

  8. I think its a bit silly implying that the fantasies of a 10 year old boy are somehow a blueprint for what he as a 50+ year old would do if he got into power.
    I’m sure that a lot of us thought about what we would do if we ruled the world, its called healthy imagination.
    But aside from that, if National want to pull a rabbit out of a hat then they need another John Key, someone who can get the wavering voters over to National by force of character.
    Is Todd Muller that person?
    Doesn’t appear so, at this stage, and National don’t have much time on their hands to shape him up from Opposition Leader to potential PM.
    Even if he comes over as intelligent and well-grounded, that’s not what is the important nowadays.
    You have to have PERSONALITY, you have to grab people by the balls (or some other part if they are female) and engage them.
    Jacinda manages to do that rather well in her own earnest but sufficiently laid back style and with her good track record of holding firm under intense pressure, she will be a hard one to beat this September.
    We’ll see what happens tomorrow.

    • “I think its a bit silly implying that the fantasies of a 10 year old boy are somehow a blueprint for what he as a 50+ year old would do if he got into power.”

      Yes, but as a 50+ he referred back to them in his maiden speech. They are then not simply fantasies he has left behind as a 10 year old, but are revealing of a current and concerning level of narcissism, albeit tempered by reality (leader of national and not president of the US, lol)

    • I’ll complete what started…

      19/05/20 Muller tells Newstalk ZB;
      Muller said “no” when asked about leadership ambitions by The Country on Tuesday, saying Bridges was “doing a bloody tough job well” and that nobody could predict now that National could not win the election.
      “I do not believe we can sit here now, 130 days out from an election when we are about to tip into the greatest recession of a generation, that you can make that view that National cannot win.

      “I don’t believe it, I know the National Party caucus don’t believe it, and I know Simon doesn’t believe it.”

      Well golly gee whiz, turns out Muller did believe it after all and meanwhile, and all premium grade bullshit to one side, ol’ Toddy has been hard behind the scenes, sneaking about, doing the rounds, knives out, shoring up the numbers.

      And this two faced lying creep wants to be PM. Christ, National have no shortage of deceit but this conman takes the prize!

  9. Anyone coming from Bay of Plenty are died in the wool ‘Nationalities’, so they may pick ‘baldy Muller’ just for him coming from small farming rural town Te Aroha population around 3000.

    So he is really a ‘farming boy’ and that generation he came from was the generation he scoffs at and he ridicules as “boomers” so he is an uncaring sod it appears.

    Another arrogant MP suited to National Party politics.

  10. I think this combination is the wrong way round.

    Nikki Kaye should be on the ballot as leader , at least everyone knows who she is and could recover some of the vote back from Labour.

    I despise the National party but Kaye is almost credible and i have always been impressed by her.

    I don’t think Bridges is finished just yet but i would love too eat my words tomrow night.

  11. Typical nonsense opinion piece. Ardern like Trump, Morrison and Boris is getting a rally around the flag bump and that is all. Take away the disasters and her government has been utterly incompetent, which lead to the precious polling showing National and Act could form a government. Labour will come back to the pack and National will rise again, that’s how NZ politics works. I believe Ardern will win the next election, but it certainly wont be because of policy or outcomes for NZ. Like Key, the media love her, so middle NZ loves her. The same arguments that were made against Sir John can easily be made against Ardern. How pathetic we have become in this country to accept so little from our leaders. We all deserve better, about time kiwis realized that.

    • Good attack MickeyBoyle, except for 2 points.

      1)I think you mean ‘previous’ polling not ‘precious’.

      2) You discount the government’s covid-19 policy which she fronted. We were fortunate the ideas of scientists like Prof. Michael Baker were followed and we have had a relatively good result keeping the infections low, so far. We are going to thank her for that unless the virus takes off with a big increase in feckless contact.

  12. The Gnats have earned a bit of negative karma over the years, and it’s finally coming to bite them. Doesn’t really make much difference whether they roll Bridges or not. Except to those of us on the Left – the more ineffectual flailing the more amusing it will be.

    But when the dog and pony show is over, it is in everyone’s interest if the Gnats sort out their shambles and start to behave like a party in a genuine democracy – less Trumpian bombast and a bit more attention to detail. Not holding my breath.

  13. You insert Joe Biden into Muller’s chances, but he doesn’t have Biden’s “quick fire articulated wit”. Are you having a laugh Bomber? I read good journalism from the US every day and the latest on Biden is that he’s an embarassment to the Democrats, bumbling his speech – the opposite of articulate. Your whole rave is mainly a tribute to Jacinda, and how the Natz can’t defeat her but you don’t put it simply. Why should you? It’s your blog and you can cry[rave] if you want to.

  14. 100,000 HOUSES


  15. Gotta say I think this guy might surprise you. He looks and talks like a school principal at an all boys school from the 80’s. Which is the kinda vibe a lot of voting NZers would dig if you ask me… By the time September rolls around the halo might be fading above Jacindas head too. Hope I’m wrong but he’s got a chance


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