satire

Ummmmmmm…

Because public meetings to discuss a pandemic is on brand for National Party stupidity. 

If you aren’t a socialist at 20 you have no heart.

If you aren’t a capitalist by 40, you have no brain.

If you are ever a young nat, you have no mates. 

Nothing sums up the current existential pandemic crisis of public health vs commercial interests than Sport played in empty stadiums.

Add the climate crisis to this metaphor & the stadium is on fire while Oil companies are outside still selling tickets

PUNTER: You have my arm up behind my back, you’re hurting me.

SIMON: Keep smiling at the camera or I’ll break it

The straightest most white male road trip since the Crusades.

New Fox TV line up.

So I’m personally running the virus response.

It’s the best response. Biggest response in history. Media are very mean to me, never recognise how the response is the best. Should be made illegal to be mean to me. We will beat this virus, we are the best at beating virus, never been a better virus beater in the world.

Any questions? 

There’s a lot going on in this tweet.

How many people might die from this?
What?
That many?
And when can we get a vaccine?
What?
That long?
I told people it would be ready next month. Can it be ready next month?
No?
Pence, you will be in charge of this one.