satire

Good people of Auckland!
Hear me now!
You will NEVER get a refund!
#TheBitchIsBack

The Leader of the Opposition writing his tax announcement 5 minutes before presenting his tax announcement. 

Not one dodgy $100k donation, but TWO dodgy $100k donations.

Gang tensions high at Waitangi.

“My fellow New Zealanders. I would like to answer all questions about my dodgy donations by self selecting some questions to read out on the Facebook.

WINSTON: “You see. Half of this fish is donated to the NZ First Foundation who then loans it to NZ First. The other half of the fish is owned by a subsidiary of the Trust while this other fish is banked with the Party Secretary who also takes 2 more fish.”

JOURNALISTS: “But that’s a total of 4 fish Mr Peters.”

WINSTON:”Shut up you journalists! I’m not going to be lied to about how many fish I have. I’ve done nothing wrong!”

Dr Seuss’s new book:

One Bum

Two Bums

Red Bums

Blue Bum

“I love Wanky Concert FM more!”

“No I love wanky Concert FM more!”

When your heteronormative neighbours crash your gay event to tell you how well you’re doing.