The omnishambles that is the Muller coup and how it will destroy National at the election 

Blind panic has a name, and it is Todd Muller

Tell me Hoots didn’t implode a career at RNZ and The Herald for this?

If you thought Todd Muller was bad on TV – you haven’t seen him on Facebook Live!

Don’t worry if you missed it, barely 1000 people watched but again, he was awful. From a technical point of view, can someone please buy him a microphone out of petty cash because as you will note from many of the comments, no one could hear what he was saying.

Planning to take over a Party is one thing, forgetting to turn up the microphone when giving the speech explaining why you took over a Party reeks of amateur hour.

Muller’s coup is making a train wreck look organised. All Muller has done since rolling Bridges is remind everyone how much better Bridges was!

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The collective noun for a group of train-wrecks is a ‘Muller of ‘wrecks’ as in ‘Jesus wept, he’s had a Muller of Wrecks on all the media interviews this morning hasn’t he’.

On Morning Report this morning he got beaten up.

On The AM Show, he got beaten up.

And on Breakfast with John Campbell, it was technically grievous bodily harm.

The first week of Muller’s leadership has looked so incoherent & incompetent that imagining how badly they would have handled the terror attack, volcanic eruption & pandemic isn’t worth the nightmare!

What on earth were National thinking putting this guy in charge?

The poll change for Labour represents 400 000 voters – thats not a ‘bump’ from Covid, that’s a sea change!

That’s previous National Party voters who have been so impressed with Jacinda that they are repaying her with their vote.

Her leadership has earned her their support.

How will this omnishambles of a coup bring any of those 400 000 voters home to National?

Labour have a real chance of outright majority & National could hit a new low with Muller, so to be fair on the Opposition we should allow them to have a redo & put Simon back in!

This matters because for NZ Democracy to be strong, we NEED a strong Opposition. Say what you like about Simon Bridges, but he forced the Government to defend itself. Under Muller, National is too busy defending his poor performance than mount an attack on Labour.

Muller has all the false confidence of a tall man and all the weaknesses of David Shearer combined with the electoral success of David Cunliffe.

National voters will look back on Simon’s 29% and consider them halcyon days.

It’s Nikki Kaye who I feel saddest for – after Muller leads National to a historically low election result only the hardcore National electorate MPs will remain and they certainly won’t elect her as leader for 2023! Muller is destroying two careers – his and Nikki’s!

This coup inside National was driven by self interest and the fear of unemployment – as such it has no real political depth or value other than self preservation.

A life jacket has never looked so limp.

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  1. That poor man looks as if he’s expecting to be shot – even the pot plant is drooping.

    Perhaps Matthew Hooten could replace him with Mark Richardson or Mike Hosking.

  2. re the Nact CCP

    Toddy Muller is out of step with arguing New Zealand should be opening the borders to China…toady Muller is also out of step with Australia and ASIO and the USA:

    ‘China’s move to rein in Hong Kong is just the start’ ( Sydney Morning Herald)

    In flagrant disregard to the dangers of the virus to New Zealanders ….and all the gains NZ has made under Jacinda….toady Muller argues this:

    Surely New Zealand should be positioning itself as a safe haven headquarters for international business and technology which is Chinese Wuhan virus free.

    Do we want the CCP Nactional Party ….HELL NO!

  3. Bomber, I haven’t laughed so much since yesterday’s Ngati Epsom quip by Shane Jones. Great piece. You’re right – it was purely a self-preservation coup. And the best to come out of it were Nicola Willis (his speech writer and old Fonterra croney) and Amy Adams (recently retired to the political scrap heap).
    I give Muller 1 years tops – then it’s. “Here’s Jude, honey I’m, back.”

    • Did anyone other than Muller and a few other delusional die hard Nat fans ever believe he could win the election in 3 months time?

      Muller has set himself us as the man / party that has the best policies to help NZ business recover. Obviously, he feels those policies are much better than the Government’s and his only possible path to victory in September. So what are those all important policies Todd? mmmmm arrrrr mmmmm arrrrrr, I’ve asked Amy Adams to look into that and report back to me but I’m certain they will be fantastasic policies because Amy Adams is so wonderful etc etc bla bla bla. So Muller’s policies are best…but unfortunately, he has no policies. Is he applying for a stand up comedian role?

      I won’t be a negative attack opposition…next sentence, if people vote Labour in September it will be catastrophic for the next two generations of kiwis.

      Where’s the hat Todd? (haha uncomfortable smile) it’s been packed away in a box and will be staying there. So, we’ve established he won’t own what he stands for as he’s fearful of being exposed for what he is. What is that exactly? a cross between a Trump fan, a school headmaster and a tacky car salesman who wants to distract you away from the pile of bodies to look over at the magnificent car he wants you to buy. Hasn’t got wheels or an engine but is certain it will be a great bargain and a magnificent example of a 3 wheeled school bus being powered by a broken 3 horsepower outboard motor.

      So what’s really going on? DAMAGE CONTROL and seat warming for the party terrified of being unemployed, powerless and irrelevant. The new blue savior is almost here. Christopher Luxon. Nats believe if they put a better speaker in than Bridges, most of them will retain their jobs rather than have the wipe out the polls are predicting. Only thing is, this Nat leader speaks just as badly if not worse than Bridges.

      Bridges must be laughing and the Nats more divided than ever. Oops. All very sad of course.

      For the record, Judith Collins will never lead the National Party.

      • Poor old Tod Muppet.
        He truly represents the chiNational Party of today; tired, past it’s use-by date, and pushing economic policies utterly irrelevant to the 21st century.

  4. Todd Muller reminds me of someone . I don’t know who, but I do know it’s someone I don’t like or respect much.Who is it?

  5. National should drop their ‘love affair for trucks’ and ‘road only’ and go ‘environmental and support all regional rail’ – and they may get some swinging left wing voters and a life line?

  6. Meanwhile in Kiwiblog land, just ONE post from Farrar about National Party list. Nothing else to say. If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all? Contract being reviewed? In ZB land, Hosking says that Muller is useless. In AM show land, Richardson says Muller is useless. With friends like these….?

    • Neither of them actually no anything about who is useless and who isn’t. They are both right wing mouthers nothing more. I loathe them both.

  7. Re Muller’s interview with John Campbell.
    Muller was clearly rattled – again! Raising eyebrows heavenward occasionally and putting on his stern Headmaster’s face from time to time and insisting on speaking – electioneering – over John’s questions.

    But here’s the nub: Muller must have had an economic plan which he would have presented to the caucus that elected him, mustn’t he?
    If he didn’t and the caucus elected him because (1) he was the only one to put his name forward and (2) they were so utterly desperate to get rid of Bridges, it simply shows the collective incompetency of the National caucus (hardly the “phenomenal” team that is regularly touted by Muller). I suspect it’s a bit of both as Muller obviously never had an economic plan because, as he said in the Campbell interview, Amy Adams is still writing it!

    Hardly the caucus as Muller describes them; more like a greedy bunch of desperadoes totally fearful of losing their jobs!!

    John Campbell was right to ask the question over and over. Muller’s exasperation was not of Campbell’s making but of his own.

  8. In my humble opinion fuckers.
    muller, was put there by design as was simon bridges .
    key left national because there were no longer reasons for the shiny, parasitic gristle to stay on.
    Imagine bridges as the handle screwed on to national which was used to throw national under a bus?
    muller, an easily manipulated narcissist in the vein of trump is another sacrificial muppet being used to further taint the national brand.
    Meanwhile, labour floats like a turd to glory.
    The script isn’t difficult to follow…
    Rich-as AO/NZ was well ripened by the time 1984 came along and ready for the picking.
    We had glorious state owned assets and amenities now printing cash for privateers was scooped up by criminals and many of those assets just keep giving. ( Think our electricity? )
    But now? In these unforeseen internet times, we Wolves seeking truths and explanations come scratching at the criminal swindlers doors so the criminals must weave a web of deceit to allow them to slip away with our riches as a result of their crimes ever fearful of being found out since stalling and being subversive until they all die of old age is no longer a retirement option for many of them because who knew? The interweb…! ?
    Enter labour. The Trojan horse of neoliberalism.
    Labour was used to infect AO/NZ with a script written by crooks, as we now well know, and now, after the crooks kept to the script and plundered all that was plunderable, they must make good their escape.
    What better a way to escape than have what is essentially the same socialist democracy party that built our wealth and infrastructure in the first place be their get-away car?
    Labour is calming the waters, appeasing the people, spending money on society while smiling, waving, getting all snuggle-smoochums, nothing to see here but gifts, grace and optimism. Anything, anything at all rather than instigate a royal commission of inquiry into AO/NZ’s past and present politicians and their now rich-as-fuck privateer mates. Aye Boys?
    Labour Trojan Horsed the scum in, and now Labour’s Trojan horsing the scum out again.
    Softly, softly, nothing to see here, move along now, throw them cake and fuck us all, right…?
    Great news, perhaps, for the next wave of human capital stock who will be shamelessly exploited but it’s a bit shit for those of us who’ve had to endure the last thirty six years.
    “Trump adviser Kevin Hassett: ‘Our human capital stock is ready to go back to work'”

    • …’ Labour Trojan Horsed the scum in, and now Labour’s Trojan horsing the scum out again ‘…

      …’ Great news, perhaps, for the next wave of human capital stock who will be shamelessly exploited but it’s a bit shit for those of us who’ve had to endure the last thirty six years’…


      And that’s exactly what DID happen, it started with Douglas. It now ends (or starts all over again ) with this Labour led COL. The chickens have come home to roost and now the chickens are getting restless. They’d best get a wiggle on.

      I lost a marriage ( indirectly) through such shitty appalling excuses for wages I received as a qualified tradesman in the 1990’s that could barely put food on the table for a family of four and pay for petrol to get to work, a child ( almost Mengeles style ) due to lax medical diagnosis ( I have a Dip Sc / tech) and my sister was a head nurse most of her life ,- and we could see there was skulduggery and covering things up with the subtle things they did to hasten his death due to the unspoken ‘ budget requirements’ on who should live and who should die as agreed upon by DHB’s… , my tradie business, and the small nest egg I received in which I bought and did up two property’s and eventually bought a section worth over half a million dollars back then ( 2007 – 2008) in which I had it all organised to move a 5 bedroom house onto to do it up.

      And it was an Aussie bloody bank that sold that property out from under me while I had already had a local real estate agent putting it on the market ( after a panicky female voice over the phone getting all demanding from the bank ), – and the shitters never even informed us. My real estate agent was gobsmacked. I remarked to him ”what if we had a buyer and had signed up a contract and then this bloody Aussie mob sold it to someone else? ”…

      Lost the fucking lot. Everything. Even had to give my bloody two dogs away.

      So much for hard fucking work and reaping the rewards, eh?

      Nowadays I’m proud to call myself a frikken bum.

      I got nothing to lose.

      All because of the same sort of fat f@cker American greedy suited bastards who could never contain their psychotic sociopathic lust for power and wealth that also infected this country under same sort of neo liberal trash such as Douglas, Richardson, Shipley , Boldger and even Clarke.

      Neo liberals.

      Nothing good to say about them.

      And in my reckoning ?, – I’d say they owe you , me and all those affected by their rapacious avarice a whole bunch back in return. Such as long prison sentences for treason, political misrepresentation meaning fraud, lies and derailment of the democratic process and what could be termed ‘grand theft’ of the commons. They owe us big time.

      So, – long prison sentences and a re-appropriation of all assets and moneys they made thereafter as a direct result of their thefts which would keep it inline with today’s inflationary prices.

      That’d just about make things square.

      And I say ‘ just about’, – because that will never bring back the lives that were lost because of the downgrading of our health services or those who died because of ‘totally avoidable third world respiratory diseases’ from living in an equally and deliberately downgraded state housing market designed to open it up to offshore private company’s, – and who couldn’t afford the privatized bloody electricity company’s price gouging power bills to keep themselves warm !!!

      I aint talking to working class New Zealanders, I’m addressing this to every self centered and grabastic middle class and wealthy bastard who have done ‘very nicely thank you very much’ out of this shit neo liberal system we’ve had for the last 36 years on the backs and sweat and the lives of working people, – and lately , – cheap immigrant labour.

      I hope your hands shake and tremble when you swipe that credit card at the supermarket and watch that check out operator being described in the news as an ‘essential worker’. Because YOU sure as hell aint. And the farm hands and the truck driver who delivered stocks to that supermarket, and the medical staff and so on and so forth.

      So how about getting honest and coming clean and paying a decent and realistic wage and / or salary? , – Or is your business model too weak ?, Isn’t the first rule of neo liberalism ‘if a business isn’t efficient it should fail to make way for a more efficient business’ ? Are YOU too big to fail? Are you too damn stingy and you don’t want to admit it? Why are big businesses seeming to get the lions share of govt handouts yet are the first to sack people at the first hint of a crisis? Why did so many say there was no money to pay people higher wages in a so called ‘first world’ economy and even having a ‘rock-star economy’ when things were supposedly good ?, – yet lo and behold , when a crisis comes along suddenly THERE IS MONEY….?

      Have I missed something here?

      I must have been living in the thunder-box taking a 36 year long dump !

      Hell, – I think we all must have been if that’s the case !!!

      But the reality is, – we’ve all been fed bullshit and kept in the dark like mushrooms.

      COUNTRYBOY is dead right.

    • Reads like you have been eating too many magic mushrooms, while you don’t want to believe the simple obvious explanation Martyn has provided no amount of wishful thinking is going to make your ideas believable.

      • Yes , yes , yes , we all get it, Nat backbenchers and their penchant for self preservation and not wanting to be seen down at the dole offices, Muller being a bumbling oaf yadda, yadda, yadda,… but what CB is doing is looking at is the global aerial view, not just the ground level regional view.

        And that’s something decidedly lacking in the defenders of global neo liberalism who we may call the Woke Left. Too many of them become the useful tools of the far right either by naivety or by design.

        The Standards a great place to find them. Reeks of it.

        Here at TDB, we have a more mixed nuance, and the plain blunt facts are, that we’ve had 36 years of both National and Labour govts maintaining that status quo.

        And yet , almost like being schizophrenic,- the cry goes up for a Keynesian style sea change but no one wants to come right out and say it, or has the balls publicly, or is too afraid of change, or has too many vested interest so pays lip service, or is too smug and self satisfied to really even care. They just like to bleat.

        So, there you have it: the global aerial view of where we are ,- or the ground level regional view.

        Neither of which is wrong, and are both different perspectives of the same prism,- BUT !

        If people REALLY want change – it is the global aerial view that in the long term counts. And most people don’t want to talk about that and offer answers because it all seems so complex and involved,… but it was done by prior generations,… who suffered far worse than these last generation’s ever have.

        And it worked. And you owe your lifestyle as you experience it today because of the acceptance by this country and others of an economic theory from a Professor of economics from Cambridge University, England.

        John Maynard Keynes. Worth a few good hours reading about him. And understanding it. And then comparing it to Milton Freidmann and his Mont Pelerin society’s hideous neo liberal agenda.

        And then maybe CB wont seem like he / she has had too many magic mushrooms after all.

        Just sayin’.

        • Well said, and largely in agreement with yourself and CB.

          What’s missing is perhaps the hard and soft power that influences NZ politics and government policy – specifically the US empire and their more powerful vassals (UK, France etc.). The ‘Washington Consensus’ still stalks the halls of power in NZ – no NZ PM in recent memory has effectively stood up to such the power and influence of the ‘western’ empire. I guess in a small way Clark kept NZ out of combat in the empires resource wars (Iraq) but beyond that no NZ government will step out of the narrow paradigm defined by the empire. Hopefully this changes as the US continues to skid.

          Also, don’t forget about the NZ Mont Pelerin Society criminals who constitute the core cabal who enriched themselves at New Zealand’s expense post 1987 (and helped plan the coup).

          “The Standards a great place to find them. Reeks of it.”

          Re The Standard – personally I gave up on TS more than a year ago due to some of their authors WOKE attitudes. When challenged with a contrary opinion those authors go straight ad hominem as opposed to debating the point. I can think of one author in particular who went straight for abuse several times and wasn’t pulled up. This is very unfortunate as TS has some good authors, however when the mods tolerate a double standard from their WOKE authors and allow them to behave the way they sometimes do TS shows it’s culture for what it really is..

  9. Question is, if Christopher Luxton, with John Keys nod, was on final approach to take up the throne of the National Party late 2020, then how the hell did answer become Todd Muller?

    Luxton anointed by the money man himself has given way to a hijacking by some dude from somewhere in the outer North Island. Muller has nowhere near warmed enough toilet seats to be anywhere near the helm of this black-flagged ship. John Key must be thinking, What.The.Fuck!

    How has this party gone from the teeny tiniest moves being focused grouped to death to avoid any controversy, to naked panic akin to a pack of wild dogs let loose in a butcher shop? How?

  10. This is all starting to look like a setup… Muller is so obviously unfit to do this, or the Pm’s job if the stupid thing happened and they won the election, then I have to assume this is the prequel to the new leader being brought in at the election, and elevated to become the savior of toryism everywhere.. We all know who I’m talking about, as Johnny sparkles himself has touched his shoulder, and anointed him as his natural successor.. The gnats aren’t interested in winning this election.. The issues are above their capabilities, and political motivations to deal with as a real government should, just like the real government we have now, and they know it.. This is just setting the scene for making Keys bitch Luxon look good..

  11. He’s the leader of the dream team for National……they are all so phenomenal and exceptional…. When asked about how many of his ammmmaaaazzzzzing team of 55 had actual business experience Toddles basically assumed all of them until Ryan said 23%….LOL

  12. Nekminit! The Royal Imperialist Leader of the Labour party, Heir Winston Peters wants an early election by declaring he wants Level One now!

      • I dislike her, not for her angst and energy over the various tragedies that have happened, she is good as a communicator and up front and on to it. BUT because she got into politics because of child poverty, she got a commission or group to look into benefit levels and she has done squat about both these issues…. I hate the Labour Party they are so little different to the Nats.

  13. Dumping a leader on the basis of opinion polls is an unfortunate modern tendency. Previously even losing an election didn’t necessarily mean you lost the party leadership, Norman Kirk finally won on his third attempt.

  14. Jacinda for the next two elections please;
    We must give each main Party Labour/National; – both each equal time to prove their worth.
    Score to date;
    *National had 9yrs of Johnny key = result sellout shambles.
    * Labour now 3yrs. of Jacinda = result beginning of transition.

  15. It’s remarkable how everyone knows all there is to know about Todd Muller now, when a few days ago he was a loaf of white bread named Todd Somebody Whatshisface.
    I think I might withhold judgement for a bit.

    D J S

    • Wise.

      “If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

      – Sun Tzu.

    • There’s a strange part of me that often appreciates a conservative approach. But not when it sacrifices the many for the few. That to me is a perversion of what it means to truly be conservative. And neo liberalism is a perversion of conservatism. As is the ‘ Third way’.

      By contrast I look at one of the greatest leaders of all time who not only saved his own country but the entire destiny of the world as we know it and who was a REAL conservative: Sir Winston Churchill.

      The Great Sir Winston Churchill.

      Obese, and a boozer who drank other leaders under the table , armed with with an acerbic wit, he effectively told both Roosevelt and Stalin to man up , stop squabbling and get their acts together and to act in a united way. And they did.

      Adern has some of those qualities, as does our own home grown Winston.

  16. Lets all be assured if a Labour MP did the same number of bloopers as Todd Muller then National will be yelling to all and sundry that that Labour MP is incompetent and MUST resign.
    But not even a pip-squeak out of the sycophantic MPs of the National Party.
    It kind of makes one realise how much National just don’t have the guts to look upon themselves and realise they are the ones at fault.
    It’s amazing how hypocritical National can be and has been when it suits themselves.
    They are not exactly the political party one would really want in government when they cannot even notice let alone acknowledge the fact they make mistakes.
    Muller now appears as opportunistic and self-serving. But him harping on about ‘fixing the economy’ after 9 long years of a previous National failing to do so when it came to the low income workers of New Zealand shows National have long passed their “USED BY DATE”.
    I wouldn’t vote for National ever again.

  17. “What on earth were National thinking putting this guy in charge?”
    He’s probably the guy in the room with the most money.
    It’s a biological thing. National Party MPs imprint on the wealthiest in the same manner that ducklings fresh out of an egg do with their mother duck.
    John Key is a good example, he had only been in politics 10 minutes before he was appointed heir apparent.


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