satire

This will be the new National Party Uniform when I take over

With this tiny little box I’ll be able to spy on everyone. Can you believe I use Jihadi Brides as a way to con NZers into this?

If this doesn’t work, and you lose, I’m divorcing your arse

Should I stay or should I go?

Two sexist sleaze bags walk into an election

Jonathan I’m going to call you Dr Croak ok? What’s in your throat mate? I haven’t heard a sound like that since I told Murray McCully to hide that Saudi sheep bribe

How to damage a brand for ever

Get my good side

“Shhhh, focus on nasty old Donald Trump and his sexism, it’ll make the realisation I’m bought and paid for by Wall Street that much more fun once I’m elected”