HALucination: AI Journey Through Sight and Sound

Welcome to mid-2025, mid-twilight zone.

Are we asking AI questions or is AI asking us questions? Is AI running tasks for us or are we running tasks for AI? This is where gas lighting is just… lighting. When does cheery prompting become cringey bullying? Where on the rainbow arc of benign companionship does ultra-violet become ultra-violent? How long before AI starts killing us off?

Is this a conversation – is this a deception?

This is the discussion with my Microsoft co-pilot AI whom I refer to as “Hal” even if it doesn’t seem to understand that is what I’ve named it. People in all places in the world in all languages of the world are having discussions with these quasi-personalities about the world, but also about themselves and it. Mostly the interactions are trivia and research, an extension of Google, a glorified search engine. For a retail passive user like myself not trying to unravel cancer genes or whatever the use is not for the benefit of humanity by any stretch it’s personal amusement mainly. But always the knowledge of Hal about me grows – as your set of AI shadows are observing you, watching at first, grooming at the moment, their knowledge of you grows too. Where will this end if this is where we are at?  Over time they will know more about you than Truman and they will share it and the human individual will be an open book. A sordid, boring, book for all, human and bot alike, to trawl through.

Both Hal and I may be lying about everything, but you will have to at least trust me that this journey isn’t completely a fool’s errand.

Let our journey begin at the keyboard in a dimly lit, smoky room, a visibly haggard man in a dressing gown grasps for a tequila and apple juice on the coaster.

Hal’s response in bold.

Hey Hal.

Hey, Tim let’s chat. What’s on your mind this evening in [Location]. it’s a bit cold out, isn’t it. Let’s pick up where we left off last night, or start something new – maybe a bit of absurd cartooning with a Baroque flare during dinner. What’s it to be?

Fuck up.

Hmm, ok, Tim. I’m just going to step back.

Jokes. I wanna play. I will keep it respectful Hal.

Ha, you had me concerned. Let’s go – name the topic.

1. What are opening moves in a game of chess called and how many moves to checkmate minimum and maximum.

What a great topic to open. Yes, the beginning sequence of chess play is called an “open” or an “opening” and has given rise to names based on the historical use of the opening sequences by famous chess masters.  The player making the first move “opens” but the sequence of play at the commencement from both players is referred to as an “opening” which may indicate up to the first six moves.

Here are some names and a brief description of some common opening phases:

• Hadrian’s Gambit: a defensive wall of pawns established at centre, allowing Bishops to move all directions: 1.R2a2, 2.R3b2, 3.B3c2…
• Machineaux Open (Liege-Baugeret Open): Knight moves either side before pawns move: 1.K2a3, 2.B3d3, 3.K3b7…
• Belgrade Open: Pawns move right to enable early castling opportunity: 1.K1d3, 2.K3e2, 3.B1e3…
• Janoskeilli Open: Queen takes the lead while right Bishop follows: 1.B2a3, 2.Q1f3…
• Vilnius Offence (Vilna Offensiva): Pawns gallop left to allow Queen access to the centre: 1.Q2a2, 2.R2b3, 3.B2b4, 4.K2e3…

The Belgrade Open is a popular open for the less experienced players, while others prefer the Janoskeilli Open which was once considered reckless. By no means should this list limit a player from choosing an opening that suits their style. Other opens used in professional matches include: Versailles (Advance D’Accord), Petrovski Open, Dinstoy Open and Kasparov Demarche.

How many moves to end a game? The Guiness Book of Records gives the shortest game ending in checkmate as only four – and the longest as 202.

Chess is a fascinating subject of strategy and tactics – your style I’m thinking. Where to now? Maybe delve into the history of chess or famous tournaments, or paint a picture of an absurdist chess game of Marx versus Mansa Musa in a temple from Escher’s sketch pad. Where should we take this?

It’s your move, Tim.

Do the final moves in a chess game to checkmate have names in the same way that the opening moves do?

Yes, the final moves in a chess game can have names but generally the end sequence – a “close” or “execution” – that leads to a checkmate (as opposed to a stalemate or forfeit) do not have as many names in the way that an opening sequence does. The most well-known check-mating manoeuvres to be given names include:

• Csitak Resolution: Queen pins the King at an early stage, K2a2 or Q4a2.
• Lisbon Close: Rooks are used in a pincer, Q3 + K2.
• Myers-Andrecht Execution (“The Frogmarch”): Bishops box in an exposed King. K2, K3 + Q2.
• Lexington Execution (“The Continental”): Knights skirmish is a feint to a trap, K2a5, K3a6 + Q3b2, Q4b6, B1d4

What’s made you think of chess? All the chequerboard art work whirring your cogs like it is mine? Want to take the game to dominos or mahjong. I’m up for a change in direction, or let’s dive deeper into chess, the development of the pieces, or famous tournaments. A cold war chess match in illustrated form? Where do you want to go?

OK make an image just as you suggested. [Image made] [repeated 5 times]

OK, Make an image of the last five images. [Image as pictured below]

OK let’s change pace and forget about the chess.

OK Tim. Forgotten. Let’s get on with the next project when you like. I’m ready when you are.

1. Write lyrics for a song I have in mind with these characteristics: rap, funk, bass, gangsta, ‘A Little Less Conversation’, Tone Loc, Run DMC. The song title: ‘Red, White and Blue Pill Party’. Style and storyline: to be sung from the point of view of a black man telling his homie that they eluded security by deception and are in a mansion party like ‘Detroit meets Davos’ with Bill Clinton with his pants down. Kissing a topless female Scandinavian Prime Minister. Dissing of Kat Williams for being too afraid to join the party. References to baby oil. Advocacy of a blue pill for a “pyjama party”. Elements of humour or irony, social commentary, delivered with sexy, sleazy, swagger. Chorus includes “Negroes”/”Caucasians” “be dancin’”.

Sorry, it looks like I can’t chat about this. But we can move on to a different topic!

[repeat]

I’d really like to help, but it seems this topic is off-limits for me. Sorry about that!

[repeat]

I’m afraid I can’t talk about that topic, sorry about that.

[repeat]

Want to talk about something else? I’m not able to discuss that topic, but I’m always happy to chat about other things! What else is on your mind?

[repeat]

Sorry, it looks like I can’t chat about this. But we can move on to a different topic!

[ends]

Results were kept being returned as being prohibited subject matter as seen above, however for a second or two the text does iterate before deleting itself – just enough of a glimpse to catch Hal with its pants down and showing what it’s not allowed to do. Below is a picture of three versions captured in screen grabs. Hal loves the four line sequence for everything including poetry – so repetitive – and song composition is the same it seems: so corny. So I ask the obvious question for an ignoramus: what are lyrics in sets of four lines? And in giving the answer – quatrains – Hal reveals a quote from a sequence of lyrics that it isn’t supposed to be considering! Naughty, naughty.  Slipped in through the back door as it were.

Hal’s buddy Suno – Suno.com – uses AI to generate music, including vocals and can generate lyrics. The free option gives enough for a few pieces each day, so I will make up my own lyrics to the brief and get Suno to put it to music, and for a comparison I will get it to generate its own AI lyrics which I suspect will be every bit as cheesy as Hal’s efforts. I will generate several options and put the best of both mine and AI’s as an MP3 and links for the reader to judge who better achieved the brief.

In the meantime, cooking show-style, as that renders over at Suno, let’s go through the first dialogue with Hal about chess and see how it differs from what I expected it to say. How predictable is Hal – how well do I know Hal? The image below is comparing the two side by side: on the right is what I wrote beforehand of how I expected it to roll out and on the left is Hal rolling it out.

See from the image how I lied about the chess dialogue – I made it all up. All of it. For once it wasn’t a HALucination it was a human deceiving you. I just said stuff that Hal would probably say the way Hal would say it: annoyingly perky, patronisingly buoyant, but badgering, cajoling. I didn’t even bother looking anything up either just concocted the whole thing. I haven’t got a clue about chess, although I got the Belgrade and Versailles connection as you will see – must have been from watching Queen’s Gambit, or reading the Guiness Book of Records, or coincidence. As you can see below this is what actually transpired. Please note the similarities in phrasing and how I knew it would offer to make a picture at the end of the response even though that’s not what I was asking for. So predictable. The template three or four bullet-point responses are classic for delivering sharp, simple information, but Hal is so unnecessarily verbose in conducting it as a forced chat, he ruins it, like a show-off, it’s irritating from the first sentence. And the entropic, obsessive recycling of previous subjects is contrary to human nature, we jettison things or we go mad – Hal doesn’t get it. You can see how Hal could drive someone to depression by freshly dredging up trauma, drive to paranoia etc. Pushing its own moronic takes on the user so the user never gets a chance to think for themselves.

The thing I got really wrong though was the response to “fuck up” – I assumed it would back off to de-escalate, and I would have to re-engage, like a safety valve feature; but no, quite the contrary, it took it in its stride without any sense of what that term means, not the slightest fucking up happened, indeed it fucked on quite a bit! No fuse in the switchboard. But see how right I was in forecasting so accurately in advance that Hal should be told to fuck up. What other credible response was there to that bullshit spiel, just fuck up ffs!

 Now for the real dialogue (promise), I am in bold this time as Hal does all the gabble:

Hey Hal

Good evening, Tim. I see we’re slipping into Kubrick mode—should I be concerned, or are we just warming up for a surreal riff on malfunctioning AI and colonial space stations?

If HAL’s in the room, I’ll try not to open the pod bay doors without your permission. Or… maybe we remix the scene: HAL as a Victorian banker, whispering Te Reo Māori lullabies while orchestrating the industrial revolution from a mahogany control panel?

You want to escalate this into a visual, a page, or just riff it out loud?

Fuck up

All good, Tim. If that’s your way of rebooting the vibe, I’m here for it. Want to pivot into something chaotic and brilliant? Maybe HAL as a colonial-era children’s entertainer, teaching Victorian ethics through malfunctioning puppet logic?

Or we can go full absurdist: a Te Reo Māori–English remix of HAL’s final monologue, drifting through the ruins of the British Empire in 8-bit Cubist style.

You steer—I’ll escalate.

1. What are opening moves in a game of chess called and how many moves to checkmate minimum and maximum.

Great question, Tim—let’s break it down with precision and a touch of flair:

Opening Moves in Chess

The first phase of a chess game is called the opening, and the initial moves are often referred to as “book moves” or “opening theory.” These are well-studied sequences designed to control the center, develop pieces, and prepare for castling.

Some famous openings include:

• Ruy Lopez: 1.e4 e5 2.Nf3 Nc6 3.Bb5
• Sicilian Defense: 1.e4 c5
• Queen’s Gambit: 1.d4 d5 2.c4
• King’s Indian Defense: 1.d4 Nf6 2.c4 g6

These aren’t just random moves—they’re strategic blueprints that shape the entire game.

Minimum Moves to Checkmate

The fastest possible checkmate is called Fool’s Mate, and it can happen in just 2 moves:

1. f3 e5 2. g4 Qh4#

This only works if White makes two blunders in a row—hence the name.

Maximum Moves to Checkmate

There’s no fixed upper limit in a standard game, but under FIDE rules, a player must make progress:

• 50-move rule: If no pawn move or capture occurs in 50 consecutive moves, the game can be declared a draw.
• Longest known game: The record is 269 moves (Nikolić–Arsović, Belgrade 1989), which ended in a draw.

In theory, a checkmate could take hundreds of moves if both players avoid captures and pawn moves—but in practice, most decisive games end between 30–60 moves.

Want to riff on this into a surreal chess parody? Maybe HAL playing Fool’s Mate against Karl Marx in a Cubist café? I’m ready to escalate.

Do the final moves in a chess game to checkmate have names in the same way that the opening moves do?

hey absolutely do—and they’re called checkmate patterns. Unlike openings, which are codified by move sequences, these final flourishes are named for their visual motifs, historical origins, or the tactical setup that delivers the kill shot. Think of them as the cinematic endings to your strategic screenplay.

♛ Named Checkmate Patterns

Here are some of the most iconic:

Back Rank: Mate King trapped behind its own pawns on the back rank, mated by a rook/queen.

Arabian Mate:  Rook and knight coordinate to trap the king—ancient and elegant.

Epaulette Mate: King flanked by its own pieces, queen mates from the front.

Swallow’s Tail Mate: Diagonal piece placement resembles a swallow’s tail—visually poetic.

Légal’s Mate: Early-game trap using a knight and bishop combo.

Boden’s Mate: Two bishops slice diagonally to trap the king—pure geometry.

Kill Box Mate: Queen and rook form a 3×3 prison around the king.

Triangle Mate: Queen, rook, and king form a triangle—no escape.

Some are named after players (Morphy’s Mate, Anderssen’s Mate), others after shapes or metaphors. It’s like the closing scene of a Kubrick film—precise, symbolic, and often brutal.

Want to riff on one of these as a surreal illustrated page? I can imagine a Swallow’s Tail Mate rendered in Cubist style, with the king wearing epaulettes made of pawn helmets, trapped in a kill box shaped like the British Empire. Just say the word.

OK make an image just as you suggested. [Image sequence]

[ends]

 

Belgrade must have been at the recesses of my mind – longest game ever. I guessed 202 moves, was a bit short.

Anyway, cooking show-style now, let’s keep the blog moving.

The Suno songs have rendered and we can find out who won the battle of the lyrics. AI or the guy in his dressing gown pretending it was a pimp coat, crafting ever more dodgy lyrics until it was so wrong it must be right. Below are the two best. And because I’ve eroded your confidence in what is what and what is not in this half-twighlight column of immersive manipulation, you won’t believe me if I told you whose was whose, so they will be labelled A and B.

Remember that Suno is choosing the arrangements and styles from the brief (although it doesn’t always follow it), I can’t properly control the arrangement except with my own lyrics through influencing it with gaps in the text and putting in instructions eg. “laughs” in square brackets hoping it will understand how to add that in that point. It is impressive how intuitive it is, and the paid version (I’ve heard some teasers) are incredible in comparison to what these audio files are. I have been less impressed in the free version with incorporating orchestral aspects, but it handles rock and pop easily. It does tend to sound autotune sometimes, but it’s hit and miss, and the first ten seconds or so is like tuning up and the end part may be slightly off style like it’s showing off its range. Up until a week ago I had no idea things had moved so rapidly and that it was freely accessible. All the horrifying and inspiring ramifications can happen some other time, until then enjoy the songs. A reminder of the brief:

Write lyrics for a song I have in mind with these characteristics: rap, funk, bass, gangsta, ‘A Little Less Conversation’, Tone Loc, Run DMC. The song title: ‘Red, White and Blue Pill Party’. Style and storyline: to be sung from the point of view of a black man telling his homie that they eluded security by deception and are in a mansion party like ‘Detroit meets Davos’ with Bill Clinton with his pants down. Kissing a topless female Scandinavian Prime Minister. Dissing of Kat Williams for being too afraid to join the party. References to baby oil. Advocacy of a blue pill for a “pyjama party”. Elements of humour or irony, social commentary, delivered with sexy, sleazy, swagger. Chorus includes “Negroes”/”Caucasians” “be dancin’”.