We are a nation of fatherless children raised by embittered solo mothers.
An Empire of broken Fathers and fractured Men holding on by a thread in these Shaky Isles with the cold embrace of an infinite loneliness the only road.
The Daughters of Kate Sheppard swipe right.
They have hollow homes but better careers.
As middle class spinsters de-center men from their joyless knitted baking sourdough lives, two old souls go slowly mad.
Labour Mum and National Dad.
We are not allowed to talk about Russell John Tully.
He is the nameless horror outside the rattling windows whistling gaps from underfunded maintenance.
WINZ and MSD are sociopathic organisations staffed with burn outs who grow to despise the vulnerability and weakness of their ‘clients’.
It is an ocean of petty tyrants who enjoy the power sadistically and take great joy in declining requests while lecturing.
Russell John Tully was a fractured man at the end of that tether and he shot up and murdered WINZ Staff in an act of violence that freaked the entire bureaucratic establishment out.
The deal between the neoliberal welfare agencies and the Government of the day that underfunds them is that they are not held to account for the harvest of bitterness their spite produces.
Russell John Tully’s violent defiance threatened to overwhelm the barriers put in place to dehumanise and belittle the poor, and that is why he is made invisible while every single WINZ Office is now staffed and manned by burly security guards who intimidate the moment your shadow darkens the door.
We are not allowed to talk about Russell John Tully any more than we are allowed to talk about Neil Roberts who blew up part of the Wanganui Police Computer Centre. His graffiti just before he attacked the Police Computer was driven by a realisation of what mass surveillance allowed the State…
…we know their anger is righteous but we turn away in fear at their snapping point.
Just like many are doing by providing Tom Philips and his children protection.
The Empire of broken Fathers that the Family Court has produced alongside the punitive child support sanctions has generated a subterranean culture that has poisoned the ground water of masculinity into a fervent bitterness that pushes a father to flee with his children and go on the run.
To even examine the issue from that perspective is Russell John Tully and Neil Roberts level cultural offensiveness that demands total James K Baxter level censorship.
Tom Philips is just another fractured Man in an Empire of broken Fathers.
When the Police finally corner him, they will shoot him dead because just like Tully and Roberts, he must be erased.
Ballad of Calvary Street
by James K Baxter
On Calvary Street are trellises
Where bright as blood the roses bloom,
And gnomes like pagan fetishes
Hang their hats on an empty tomb
Where two old souls go slowly mad,
National Mum and Labour Dad.
Each Saturday when full of smiles
The children come to pay their due,
Mum takes down the family files
And cover to cover she thumbs them through,
Poor Len before he went away
And Mabel on her wedding day.
The meal-brown scones display her knack,
Her polished oven spits with rage,
While in Grunt Grotto at the back
Dad sits and reads the Sporting page,
Then ambles out in boots of lead
To weed around the parsnip bed.
A giant parsnip sparks his eye,
Majestic as the Tree of Life;
He washes it and rubs it dry
And takes it in to his old wife –
‘Look Laura, would that be a fit?
The bastard has a flange on it!’
When both were young she would have laughed,
A goddess in her tartan skirt,
But wisdom, age and mothercraft
Have rubbed it home that men like dirt:
Five children and a fallen womb.
A golden crown beyond the tomb.
Nearer the bone, sin is sin,
And women bear the cross of woe,
And that affair with Mrs Flynn
(It happened thirty years ago)
Though never mentioned, means that he
Will get no sugar in his tea.
The afternoon goes by, goes by,
The angels harp above a cloud;
A son-in-law with spotted tie
And daughter Alice fat and loud
Discuss the virtues of insurance
And stuff their tripes with trained endurance.
Flood-waters hurl upon the dyke
And Dad himself can go to town,
For little Charlie on his trike
Has ploughed another iris down.
His parents rise to chain the beast,
Brush off the last crumbs of their lovefeast.
And so these two old fools are left,
A rosy pair in evening light,
To question Heaven’s dubious gift,
To hag and grumble, growl and fight:
The love they kill won’t let them rest,
Two birds that peck in one fouled nest
Why hammer nails? Why give no change?
Habit, habit clogs them dumb.
The sacred Heart above the range
Will bleed and burn till Kingdom Come,
But Yin and Yang won’t ever meet
In Calvary Street, in Calvary Street.
Yes we are only told part of the story .How did they arrive at this point in time ?I have been told the real story which the mother and the media are not telling the rest of NZ .lETS JUST SAY SHE IS FAR FROM SQUEAKY CLEAN .
A male member of our family was instructed by a female police officer to obtain a protection order from the family court after being assulted by his wife who wanted him out of the house so she tried to play the bashed partner ,but the police were all over her bull shit .When he went to get his protection order the court registrar laughed in his face and said he was not entitled to one because he is male .
I can see why Tom has done what he has done as he was never going to get a fair go even after rearing these kids on his own for 3 years .
Yes there are a lot of arsehole fathers out there but there is a growing number of women hell bent on destroying the life of there childrens father so they can take him to the cleaner .The family court has an unconcious bias toward the mum according to my sons lawyer .
Every week my son gets fucked over by his boys mum changing the joint care agreement because having her child interferes with her social life .
The Family Court has fully bought lock, stock and barrel the biased view that ‘women are wonderful’.
I have personally been stuck in the family court for almost three years, very similar to the time that Mr Phillips disappeared with his kids, I disappeared without mine. I was in a violent relationship but the family court never took this into account; I am a big man, how could a woman half my size terrorise me?
Fathers are undervalued and investigation shows that most crime is driven by fatherless young people.
A blight amongst so many others in our society.
Don’t talk about suicide, road deaths or anything except through statistics. These are human lives that are lost, and we should be talking about how to save our vulnerable.
Men are more likely to die from suicide, die at their jobs, have worse health outcomes, be incarcerated, suffer violence and live shorter lives. If these stats belonged to women they’d be screams of blue murder.
Yet where’s their ministry of men’s affairs?
Men are also more likely to bash women, rape women and kill them. Would your Ministry of Mens Affairs address these issues?
How do we know if we don’t try? Btw men are more likely to suffer violence than women, yes at the hands of other men, but does that make it ok then?
What is also not studied (because men are the victims) is the psychological violence women put men through. Women typically aren’t physically violent (although I think this is grossly under reported) so they use character assassination as their form of expression. Why are tv shows such as The Kardashians and MAFS so popular with women, because they love seeing people tear each other down.
Bg Let us not forget that Bill English wrote off a generation of young males as useless druggie layabouts, and at a time when 18- 24 year old male suicide rates were tragically peaking. It was a dreadful thing to do to them, and it was a lie. It was irresponsible and totally unacceptable behaviour from a mainstream political leader, and then the wee dwarf got himself knighted. Thanks for nothing, Bill.
Such a powerful lament. Should be compulsory reading for every public servant.
“A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bike” was a famous feminist meme back in the 80s and 90s.
I think lots of boys learnt from that and other feminist thinking, and then decided in effect, ‘Sod this, I won’t be needed or even welcome. Goodbye’.
That’s the boys, A, but men are different. Many men are wonderful fathers and most are pretty damn good. We’re talking about fathers here, and you’re blaming “ feminists” for fathers deciding that their offspring won’t need them or welcome them, and frankly that’s a mighty over-simplification.
You really should read other people’s posts before commenting on what you think they wrote.
Boys grow up to be men. If they are told they are the problem and not needed, they will believe that.
Well Ada I don’t think Brigid is wrong in saying you are massively oversimplifying issues. You could just as easily say women were told not to bother getting an education beyond school because their role is stay home, have kids, and do the housework. Clearly some girls didn’t listen. There would have been just as many boys who didn’t listen.
“A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bike” was a famous feminist meme back in the 80s and 90s – said someone, probably speaking into a microphone or audio recorder designed by men, eating food grown and transported by men, at a structure built by men, having driven there in a car made by men, on roads laid by men – you’re welcome.
If that were true, fish would become extinct because bikes can’t father fish. Every person and every woman and every feminist needed a man at some point, just to exist. And if you owe your whole existence to a man, then you sure needed them above anything else at that point. The only possible exception was JC.
“Men are also more likely to bash women, rape women and kill them.” – if men are more likely to murder, it maybe that more men are murderers, or women are more able to get away with murder.
And gain public sympathy. For example, compare the amount of sentiment expressed online for the actions of Lauren Dickason, convicted of killing 3 children, compared to Mr Phillips, not convicted of anything.
What actual evidence do the police have, showing that Mr Phillips has ever mistreated any of his children…nada…zilch? There are plenty of unsolved murders where police can be offering rewards. And plenty of children actually harmed or killed, that police could investigate, in the country with the worst child abuse stats in the OECD.
Quarter of a million of us harmed in state care alone, according to the abuse in care inquiry, but the authorities have shown no urgency in setting up the recommended system for redress, yet.
(www.newshub.co.nz/home/new-zealand/2020/12/up-to-250-000-estimated-to-have-been-abused-in-state-faith-based-care-royal-commission.html)
Ada Nope. Some boys never grow up. I think it’s called the Peter Pan syndrome. Being a polite sort of person (especially on Sundays) I prefer to refer to them as cases of arrested development the way that shrinks and defence lawyers do.
Anyway, do you really think that boys heed the voices of “feminists” or anybody much apart from their peer group and football coaches ? ( rhetorical question).
What is a feminist?
Oh gosh. Don’t write in a blog about something you don’t know about. Do your own homework lazy thinker. This is important stuff about people, not light to be used as fodder for ironic amusement.
Grey Warbler Oh gosh. I do have a reasonable idea about what constitutes a feminist, but I don’t think that Ada does, and that is why I asked her.
Her meme assumes that feminists, are all women. That is nonsense.
There have always been socially responsible high profile men who support women, and who describe themselves as feminists. There have always been feminists with husbands and male partners too. Ada may be equating feminism with lesbianism, and even then she is generalising, and disparaging of lesbian women.
Her ‘ like a fish needs a bike’ is just another cliche tossed around in all sorts of different situations now for cheap laughs. It trivialises a serious situation.
It’s not my meme Pip.
And how the hell do you assume anything about what I know, based on misreading a post?
Probably the same way you have assumed all these poor young boys lost all confidence because fish found another means of transport.
A type of slightly acerbic British goat cheese from the hamlet of Scrotum Thurlsby. Hopeless on pizza.
Martyn – Deeply sad for everyone in this case, for the kids, Dad, Mum, the kid’s family, and the wider community…I hope this ends without violence.
The simple solution to the Tom Phillips and family situation is to call an AMNESTY to all, not offer a reward. The the healing can begin.
I think the amnesty idea would be good – setting up an old-fashioned and useful joint meeting and getting points of agreement. Then fears stated about what could go wrong and listening, responding and adjusting. Then a pilot period with a break away for all to discuss and something permanent for at least a couple of years that is mandatory and possible. Now that would be ‘social investment’.
You have really lost the plot with this one Martyn. In your warped view. I guess all women are “woke”.
Do you have a warped view too Darien? You should say yes, because we all have our own particular stance on things and need to talk and understand each other. People in Labour and woke have elevated their views to an over-riding paramount prominence.
Feminists tended to be middle-class and poor women now only get considered because they support and widen the movement; not because they are worthy in themselves. So there is little interest in helping ‘the family’ from that branch of what were feminists. The role of women as mothers who wanted a better deal never was given proper support, mostly those for the middle class got prominence.
Not to mention the poor bastard that set himself on fire on the steps of parliament a few years back. What was his story? He barely got a mention at all in the news at the time and largely forgotten since.
https://www.stuff.co.nz/national/97119812/man-who-died-after-setting-himself-alight-had-been-protesting-family-court-issues
Note that I don’t get any input from stuff from this link just an empty screen. What a useless newspaper we saved from Fairfax. Toilet paper is more useful.
That poem’s what you get when the only drug you can buy is alcohol and the only Class we can find is in our genes and it’s shown by our history that we have none. 14 multi-billionaires? 3118 multi-millionaires? Money isn’t Class and can’t buy it neither.
A brilliant mind can tolerate fools better than a nut with a gun can. We should be very concerned that there are no brilliant minds in Government. None. Not one. All we have are dull, witless, stupid fools being cruel to nuts.
Unfortunately, as a society, we don’t call out women who behave badly in relationship breakups.
Thanks for a well-reasoned article. As far as I know, there is no suggestion that Tom Philips is likely to harm his children, himself, or his ex-wife so we do not need any gung-ho police rushing in to cause the outcome you mentioned. However, I also fear that some unaccountable police action that the MSM will fully endorse will cause that to happen. There is a real vacuum of information regarding the circumstances involved & while I can only presume the evidence would suggest that Tom has enough friends who support his view & provide for him so this is not an open-and-shut case by any means.
I wish that there was a fair system where both sides could have a rational discussion with the aim of resolving their differences that took account of the welfare of all the people involved without the threat of prison before any proven crimes. I guess that the alleged bank robbery would make that difficult though.
Yes Bonnie, you remind me that there was a move towards mediation being used a lot, very many decades ago. That was when we functioned with people in mind. Now we have business ideas in mind and people are called human resources, and probably referred to as units in some plans. So ergo, less interest in the effect of conditions and a desire to assist people, instead mad laws and puritan, authoritarian attitudes pressing down on soft human flesh and soft human brains. And the new way of turning to machines and a thinking that comes from indoctrination.
” I think lots of boys learnt from that and other feminist thinking, and then decided in effect, ‘Sod this, I won’t be needed or even welcome. Goodbye ”
Ada I don’t always find I agree with what you post but your damn right with your comment above.
Despite our political differences from many points of view on here we can come together over the impact on the family unit since the feminist movement and other subsequent changes in the way we view the roles of Mothers and Fathers and the impact on children from an early age that don’t have two functioning parents.
” When the Police finally corner him, they will shoot him dead because just like Tully and Roberts, he must be erased ”
Unless he presents a threat with a firearm he should be detained and not killed. That would harm his daughters forever and deny them a Father in their life.
I hope this is not the outcome here.
Excellent article. Heartbreaking. Like it or not kids do better with a mum and a dad. In my opinion open support for two parent families would help cure a number of persistent evils in this country.
That is so close to old-fashioned welfare state principles enabling citizens to fulfil their roles with a little bit of help. Now the opposite is true, the problems are increased, kindness is not evident and even efficiency is lacking with punitive steps as well. Humans are out of fashion – too messy. The mags and papers are always talking about decluttering – is that to make it easier to clear people out of their nests. The system killed off huias, now it is coming in its updated form for humans.
100%
Do you know anything about this case?
I’ve heard bad reports about the family court from relatives. but it doesn’t seem to get into the politics, which seems strange, given the scruple-free Right.
You haven’t proved your case with me yet.
But but but … believe women!
The social problems we have are as a result of our own lack, and our parents and grand-parents going back along the line to avail themselves and ensure that courtesies and respect are passed on and practised. The wise manners from so many who have died with no-one acting on their counsel, so letting it drop like a fashion is strange. When we changed from religious dogma to placing our beliefs in science, we made the same mistake – put human thought up as gospel. And the problems of that is that ‘gospel’ is interpreted human thought with divine meanings, which we all receive and interpret in our different ways!
Lord Chesterfield’s Letters to his Sons ans Others comes from the 1700s. And surprise, his advice still applies, perhaps even more. Try shining and distinguishing yourself by your good-breeding. Consider…whether it is not essentially your interest, by your own good-breeding to others, to secure theirs to you; and that, let me assure you, is the only way of doing it; for people will repay, and with interest too, inattention with inattention, neglect with neglect, and ill manners with worse; which may engage you in very disagreeable affairs.
I think that fact that no one has dobbed this guy in, speaks loudly to the fact that probably those who know what’s going on feel that the children are better where they are.
A woman in my family was completely destroyed by a dullard male family court Judge. The cruel outcome has rent our family into pieces. It will echo through the generations. That judge was an arrogant brutal fool. I accept many men get a rough deal. I know they do. But the system itself has plenty of room for improvement still.
Skoll. I am so sorry about what happened in your family, and I know that the impact does echo throughout the generations. I am forever haunted by the kindest woman I have ever known being destroyed by two sisters and their lawyer. She may have been driven out of her mind, and she died of natural causes about ten years later, at far too young an age.
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