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  1. After being offered KFC, the young offender decided to come down from the youth facility roof.

  2. Man rehearses to be Atlas Network Santa Claus (complete with toxic spray that kills poor people).

  3. “Drink 2 Litres of water. Check.
    Seal myself to a roof. Check.
    Now to prove trickledown theory works……..”

  4. “Just two squirts and this public housing eyesore is ruined, freeing up the land for profitable development.”

  5. Health and Safety give all clear as they say even with a fall the brain cannot get more damaged.

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