Political Caption Competition
50 shades of white

1-on-1 in 10 Interview – Salvation Army State of the Nation Report Salvation Army Social Policy & Parliamentary Unit Director…

From a National–NZF–ACT coalition to a Labour–Green–Māori alliance, here are four realistic scenarios that could shape Election 2026.

Winston Peters proposes a referendum to abolish the Māori electorates, reopening Treaty tensions and testing Luxon’s coalition stability.

Floods in Waikato and Wellington expose the gap between climate science and Government policy, as Civil Defence funding is cut during escalating disasters.

It is painful. It is infuriating. And it forces victims and the nation to endure trauma once again. But…

I don’t need to carry in KFC and pretend to care when it’s not a climate event
“We’re looking forward to the third volume of Paul’s, “Short History of Knitting”, in which Paulie expands upon knitting needles as phallic symbols for sparsely-endowed men and the odd vicious grandmother.”
“At this stage we need to know how Freud would interpret Goldperson’s obsession with knitters…”
Playful Wee Kitten Watching Ball of Wool.
(P.G.) “I’m not a Maori, but even I know that’s not the hand movements for karmartay, karmartay”
We band of brothers know how to knit ties with diagonal stripes and Paul can also boil eggs without dropping a stitch and the country calls upon him to do so now. Cheers Paulie.
“We will link compulsory knitting lessons to income support, so that the poor can knit their own clothes.”
“We will ease border control to get more crap from China, and until then the poor can knit their own clothes.”
“We will solve all mental health problems by keeping the poor occupied in knitting their own clothes.”
“We will not accept knitting as an an excuse for failing to keep WINZ appointments, work assessments, or compulsory seminars which they didn’t know about because MSD staff were knitting or unravelling.”
“We will stop winter electricity subsidies to all those cold through failing to knit their own clothes.”
“For those unable to knit through lack of workable fingers, Paul will provide lessons in making rag rugs using toes, noses, elbows, or heels. Paul will also back track if he is at all unfeasible, puerile, or peculiar.”
I will be quick, because senior shadow finance minister PG here is in a hurry to get back to his knitting.
Goldmember: “With a bit of luck no-one will even notice when we swap Toddy out for Luxon after the election.”
Cast chosen for Laurel & Hardy remake…