Bathrooms and Transgender students

ByMartyn Bradbury

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One would have thought after the terrible shootings in Orlando, no one would never raise the issue of safety when talking Transgender people using the bathroom they feel comfortable with.

Unfortunately not.

Stefani Muollo-Gray is a 16 year old transgender student at Marlborough Girls’ College and there has been a mild moral panic over Stefani using the female toilet.

This issue has become a new battle ground for bigots in America where the idea of a biological man identifying as a woman using a female toilet seems to be akin to spitting on the Holy Bible while burning the flag.

I think that how we as human beings identify gender and sexuality wise is one of the most personal and private decisions we ever make as individuals. It is for us as individuals to make those decisions and it isn’t anybody else’s right to deny an individual this most innate part of our identity.

As far as I am concerned, how a person has decided to identify themselves is their right and if a transgendered person decides to use the bathroom that they identify with, then who the fuck else’s business is it?

We have so many bloody pressing issues on this planet, preventing people from using the bathroom they feel comfortable in is such a mean spirited petty bigotry.

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18 Comments

  1. The best part to me is they obviously accept her identity, otherwise they wouldn’t allow her in an all girls school.

    So the logic is as follows.
    Feminine enough to do everything else a female can do, except piss

    1. Exactly. If you let a boy into your girls-only school on the basis that he’s decided he’s a girl, you’ve made a commitment. Don’t then try and weasel out of meeting all the terms of that commitment. Most likely they’ve got some teachers who don’t accept the commitment that was made on their behalf.

    2. Nice logic. The key word is accept.

      This issue is big in the US. Why and how is far beyond me. If we want full equality of the sexes lets just make all toilets multi gender. Then we can all argue about who put the seat up.

  2. Mean spirited – petty – sounds like someone who would block freedom of speech. You’re likely next move will be to blacklist us so you do not have to hear from anyone who disagrees with you.

    We ask for reasons for you declining our comments and you refuse.
    Sounds like petty and mean spirited to us with a touch of arrogance.

    Now quickly delete this one – quickly.

  3. Funny how the so-called supporters of the LGBT community who were attacked in Orlando, and who have claimerd to support LGBT rights against extremist attacks, haven’t appeared here to offer support to this LGBT girl.

    Why is that, I wonder??

    1. Probably because she wasn’t gunned down for being who she is??!! This is about fucking bathrooms; you really need to get some perspective here. However, if the school accepted her as a pupil they have to take everything that entails, including the use of the bathroom. I really don’t see the issue since women’s bathrooms only have cubicles. That said, if she also wants to shower with the girls after PE I can see potential problems, especially given the involuntary erections that ALL males, transgender or not, get at inopportune moments.

      1. robably because she wasn’t gunned down for being who she is??!!

        How do you know that, Nitrium? She may’ve been targetted for any number of reasons.

        1. Huh? She definitely wasn’t shot at let alone killed by a homophobic extremist! These two cases simply can’t justifiably be compared on the same sort of level, hence the much lower public interest.

      2. “Probably because she wasn’t gunned down for being who she is??!!”

        Do we have to wait till she’s gunnerd down for who she is, Nitrium?

        How much bigotry do we have to tolerate before it becomes uncomfortable to our middle class sensibilities and we say “ENOUGH!”??

        The Orlando shooter may’ve started out with just “little acts of homnophobia”. He had “perspective”.

        Then he went BIG.

        Is that what we need before you think, “Ok, she has a valid point”?

  4. Where are D’Esterre, Dave, Maninthemiddle, Andrew, and all the other self-professed supporters of LGBT rights?

    The silence from those right-wing donuts is deafening.

  5. You should consider this; a person can dress in whatever way they choose, state that they are male or female, but this does not make them either gender just because they choose to act in the role of thst gender. A sexual pervert could do great harm to others, and maybe that’s what some are objecting to. The need for a toilet is a pretty private affair, and while I like to see unisex toilets, I do not really like using a public toilet immediately after a male user, simply because of the mess, the toilet seat and lid not put down, and the likelihood of urine sprayed anywhere but the toilet bowl. So therefore, I really see nothing wrong with separate toilets for each gender. I would not feel comfortable at that school right now, nor would I feel comfortable about my daughter or granddaughters using the same toilets.

  6. You should consider this; a person can dress in whatever way they choose, state that they are male or female, but this does not make them either gender just because they choose to act in the role of thst gender. A sexual pervert could do great harm to others, and maybe that’s what some are objecting to. The need for a toilet is a pretty private affair, and while I like to see unisex toilets, I do not really like using a public toilet immediately after a male user, simply because of the mess, the toilet seat and lid not put down, and the likelihood of urine sprayed anywhere but the toilet bowl. So therefore, I really see nothing wrong with separate toilets for each gender. I would not feel comfortable at that school right now, nor would I feel comfortable about my daughter or granddaughters using the same toilets.

    2. Name me one case of a person claiming to be trans so they could harass or stalk people in bathrooms. I’ll wait. Nobody’s ever managed to do it before, even overseas, so I’ll be quite impressed if you can. I’ve never seen anyone provide anything more than hypotheticals for this supposed “problem,” which isn’t enough to interfere with someone whose only desire in this whole mess is probably to use the bathroom in peace.

      I don’t see why someone who identifies as female, who just wants to use the same bathroom as her fellow students in peace, is an issue for you. She’s probably far more worried about being harassed for being trans than anything else, that is assuming that she’s actually gay and might be interested in other women. A fair amount of transpeople identify as straight after they transition, (and there’s no guarantee that someone’s pre-transition sexuality will stay the same when they go on hormones, so committing to a fake trans identity just to harass people is an incredibly stupid idea) so the transwomen are attracted to men, and the transmen are attracted to women- in which case even your hypothetical issue goes out the window. There have been no incidents in which she has done anything unacceptable in the bathroom either, or that would be the headline instead. Let’s not invent an issue before one shows up.

      The other reality you probably need to know is that trans people have existed, and in some cases, passed as cis, for decades now. It’s entirely possible you’ve already been in the bathroom with a transwoman and never known about it. That really shouldn’t be a thought that bothers you. You’re likely at much more risk from a social conservative with odd conflicted feelings about their sexuality being in your bathroom than you are from any out queer person.

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