I don’t think we have a toxic masculinity problem, we have a wounded masculinity problem that creates toxic behaviour.
Toxic masculinity reduces all aspect of masculinity as evil.
Wounded masculinity acknowledges the damage without tainting all masculinity as the problem.
Andrew Tate is a toxic misogynist prick because he is a toxic misogynist prick, he isn’t a toxic misogynist prick because he is male.
Many young men are lost and alienated, pushing them further away by framing all men as the problem drives them into the arms of those who would manipulate their identity crisis.
The worst thing about identity politics is when men start seeing them selves as the victims.
What do Trump-voting men want from women? Probably not what you think
The US presidential election seemed to mark a backlash to changing gender roles. But most Trump-voting men say they don’t want to return to the past.
President Donald Trump’s reelection seemed to mark a cultural turning point on gender – a backlash to #MeToo and other progress for women’s rights, and a return to a time when men could be men.
His campaign told men that they had lost their status in American society and that the Trump administration would restore it. Vice President JD Vance reiterated the point at a gathering of conservatives last month: “Don’t allow this broken culture to send you a message that you’re a bad person because you’re a man, because you like to tell a joke, because you like to have a beer with your friends or because you’re competitive.”
It’s a message many Trump-voting men want to hear: Republican men are more likely than others to agree that Americans have negative views of manly men. Nearly half say that’s true, compared with a quarter of people overall, according to a Pew Research Center survey conducted during the campaign, findings that have been reflected in other polls.
But survey data, academic research and interviews with Trump-voting men suggest that most don’t want to return to a more traditional masculinity either, one that requires men to be aggressive, dominant or stoic. Instead, they want Americans to have a different take on masculinity – one that is positive instead of negative, and broad instead of narrow.
Overall, respondents were more likely than not to say American society places too much emphasis on traditionally masculine traits like physical strength and risk-taking. A majority thought there wasn’t enough emphasis on being caring or open about emotions.
And a majority – including a majority of Republicans – said certain behaviours by men were unacceptable, like talking about women in a sexual way, drinking too much or throwing a punch.
That is not always the message from the president – who has been found liable for sexual abuse, said he’d “protect” women “whether the women like it or not”, and was instrumental in ending abortion rights nationwide – or from members of his administration or right-wing influencers.
The president “is delivering results to improve the lives of women across the country”, said Anna Kelly, a White House spokesperson, including by hiring female senior staff and through executive orders to expand in-vitro fertilisation access and ban transgender women from participating in women’s sports.
Trump-voting men don’t necessarily share macho or sexist beliefs, the survey and interviews show. Instead, many think progressives have gone too far.
…apparently the intersectionist woke dogma that painted all heteronormative cis males as toxic masculinity was a tad alienating.
The truth is wounded masculinity is doing more damage and labelling them as toxic is deeply counter productive.
Boys growing up without dads are in crisis, report says
- By the age of 14, almost half of first-born children do not live with both natural parents, compared to 21% for those born in 1970
- Boys are now more likely to own a smartphone than to live with their dad
- Boys are struggling in education, more likely to take their own lives, less likely to get into stable work, and far more likely to be caught up in crime
- As the likelihood of a masculine presence in the home diminishes, young men are seeking new modes of masculinity, like the controversial social media personality Andrew Tate
- Lawrence Dallaglio, the former England rugby union captain, backed the report, stating: “We have been so careless in our downgrading of the traditional masculine virtues that we are in danger of leaving a whole generation behind.”
It costs less money long term to fix hurt boys than angry men but the woke weren’t interested in that, in 2016 when they suddenly gained cultural power via social media, middle class woke identitarians plus Fourth Wave Feminists plus non-binary activists were too busy labelling all masculinity as toxic to even consider the knock on effect of all that hashtag activism and woke cancel culture.
To them, ALL men and boys were so toxic that they must be constrained and muzzled and leashed and denigrated.
Patriarchy was defined as all men and everything male, it was all toxic and Me Too allowed a social media Lynch mob that generated immense cultural backlash.
Due process was heteronormative white cis male privilege, the new evidential threshold was anything women said on twitter and into that new world parents raising sons feared their boys would be accused of rape more than they feared their daughters of being raped which is insane because women are in far greater danger of that being true.
We told a generation of young women that every man would try to rape them and told a generation of young men they were rapists.
It’s no wonder we are where we are.
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It’s no wonder we are where we are when leading National pollie, Sir Bill English, demonised all young New Zealand males as useless unemployable druggies. A lie. A return to the days when men could be men, would see wee Bill horse-whipped for this, and not before time.
Too true!
Could it be that the open misandry in western culture also spawned the transexual movement? Like “If I can’t succeed as a man I might as well pretend to be a woman?”
Here in NZ it was particularly bas during the Clark years to the extent that a large slice of kiwi womanhood became nasty and untouchable. It’s no surprise that so many NZ men marry Asian girls.
Funny you should say that as all those nasty women you mentioned are in the CoC govt today
You can very easily be masculine and treat women with respect and care – men who treat women badly are just dickheads just as women are who denigrate men for simply being male.
James Brown. I suppose the Green Party’s Davidson is half a dickhead then for denigrating white males as responsible for all violence, or a quarter dickhead for including cisgender males in her stupendous equation, which makes Greenies who embrace her as Co-leader, diminutive dickheads.
Personally I think a major factor is the decline of the two-parent family
Something I agree with you on, it didn’t happen in a vacuum though. First we had the sexual revolution in the 60s so instead of marrying for love lust was enough of a reason, obviously relationships did not last as long or didn’t happen at all, this left some females with a child to look after so the decent thing to do was to help them out so the DPB started in the 70s which started to support an increasing number of single parent families. My view is that male and female attitudes are both at fault although since men are stronger it tends to be women that suffer the most. We have never had a perfect past and it is not possible or fair to force any sort of moral code on people although the current government seems to believe that punishing people financially is the way to go. I would like to see sensible ways to encourage people to make good long term decisions but if treating people as sex objects remains considered normal as part of growing up I don’t see much changing.
You’ve also got quite a few people now, who really don’t want to get a proper job. People with huge egos who find it much more comfy to sit hugging their phones and making all sorts of bizarre noises about everything. Influencers, of both sexes, are the parasites which have fueled part of this problem.
Their followers have jobs but poor social skills and find it more comfy to hug their phones and read nonsense that makes them feel brainy.
Brainy and with lots of friends.
They aren’t participating in life, they are just voyeurs.
Andrew Tate isn’t wounded. He’s lazy and he’s found a way to make easy money. It’s a con.
“They aren’t participating in life, they are just voyeurs.”
What a great line, and very true.
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