MEDIAWATCH: Shane Jones on The AM Show threatens to nuke Northland – I’m not joking

Christ I hate The AM Show on TV3 – it’s not just the pandering to all right wing bigotry that annoys me, it’s also its knuckle dragging wilful ignorance on almost every single issue that confronts us as a nation.

I’m working hard to lower my AM Show intake to watch Breakfast on TVNZ instead because watching The AM Show every day is the intellectual equivalence of eating a pie, coke and chips for breakfast.

Poor old Amanda Gillies is an actual journalist and she is constantly talked over by the boys whenever she tries to make a valid point. The sadness in her eyes is only matched by Melania Trump’s hollow empty sockets and I think we need to start planning an intervention to save Amanda from this train wreck the way Greg Boyed had to be saved from being part of Seven Sharp.

There’s the sports boofhead who also hosts their renovation porn show who has all the charm of a book burning event crossed with a road accident involving a school bus and then there is Duncan Garner who bloke hosts this hot mess with all the vision of a blind cyclops.

This mornings offering managed to scrape a barrel lower than their normal standards by having Shane Jones as a guest.  The Jonesy, the great waa waa of the North, the orator of Whangarei was on blowing hard about gangs boxing in Northland.

Now one would have thought that the Jonsey would be interested in actually putting ideas together that would solve gang violence issues stemming from chronic under investment in jobs, a corrupt local Police force in Northland and the counter productive move by the Government to inadvertently reset the entire economic model of the NZ criminal underworld by moving the evidential thresholds for the proceeds of crimes act.

One would have thought.

Instead, the Jonsey gave us a taste of the kind of speaking out your arse hyperbole fuckwittedness that is sure to become a hallmark of his campaign.

On The AM Show this morning, the great waa waa of the North said that if he could deal with the gangs the way he wanted to, he would get a nuke from North Korea and launch it at the Gangs….

…ummm, what?

According to our best knowledge, North Korea has anywhere between 13 and 21 nuclear warheads ranging in power from 10 to 30 kilotons.

Let’s for arguments sake say that the Jonsey can in fact smuggle a 10 kiloton warhead out of North Korea. The main gangs in Northland are Black Power, The Nomads, The Tribesmen and the Headhunters, with the largest presence being Black Power. Their power base is in Kaikohe.

Now a 10 kiloton nuclear device detonated in Kaikohe would be pretty noticeable to the people of Northland.

Everything would be vaporised within a 1 kilometre radius of the blast zone. 3000 square kilometres would be contaminated (which would engulf most of the North Island), and the flash from the explosion would be seen for hundreds of kilometres, temporarily blinding people up to 20 kilometres away.  The ‘good’ news is that the 8 kilometre high mushroom cloud would only keep its shape for a few minutes which would limit the rain of debris to just everywhere north of Whangarei.

Casualty wise, Shane Jones’ nuke would immediately kill most of the residents of Kaikohe and set in motion a nuclear winter that would spread anywhere between  300 to 800 Roentgens of radioactive contamination.

While a precise death figure is difficult to calculate, Shane’s nuke would probably kill anywhere upwards of 100 000 New Zealander’s when blast and radiation poisoning is taken into account.

While it is true that the rebuild from launching a nuclear weapon against your own population would bring jobs and businesses to Northland, the difficulty would be in getting construction firms to agree to working in highly radioactive zones where many of their workers would die.

I’m sure the Jonsey will be able to offer a few sweeteners into the kai pot to get them in there though.

So all in all, nuking your own population to eliminate the gang problem seems to be a tad over ambitious. The fact that Shane Jones can get on TV3, make a ridiculously violent promise that plays to the ignorance of the audience and go unchallenged only serves to remind me why I shouldn’t watch this retarded fuckwittedness first thing in the morning.