Between Two Ferns: Chris Luxon gives least worst speech of his political career
National Party Speech starting
I will live tweet this.
Willis giving the intro. They wanted the next Minister of Finance to open for Chris, but David Seymour was busy, so they got the next Assistant to the Finance Minister, Nicola Willis instead.
She plays up the team element rather than his personal lack of charisma – good underplay because Luxon is very underwhelming.
Willis says Luxon has a genuine love of people. Wherever he goes he wants to hear about you and your hopes.
Sounds evangelical.
Relates sons conversation about war which is odd.
If the best example you have at humanising Luxon is your kid swapping war stories with him, stick with the cringy McDonalds origins story.
Like a wooden Chewbacca on stilts, he trundles his way through the speech with all the rhythm of a pale white banjo.
Accuses Labour of embracing isolationism – which was great and made Smug Hermit Kingdom’ a great line.
Righteously hits hard on the lack of Labour progress.
Makes a long list of complaints against Labour and blames them all on Labour, which come on, Covid and geopolitics are causing more than blind stupidity on Labour’s behalf.
Makes a strong case for moving the tax thresholds.
Plays up Labour taxing more (I wish) and plays the usual ‘success is something to celebrate’.
Cheers for success makes it feel like a time share pitch.
Says he loves optimism and he loves positivity and loves goodness and loves everyone and he thinks we are the best and always look on the bright side of life.
Claims companies he has run are the same as running a country.
He wants ambition and cares about what you care about and prosperity and love, etc etc.
Argues we can fix problems, which is true, we can, it takes a bigger State with more capacity while taxing the rich.
Big shout out to the migrant vote and their large pockets.
Wink and a nod to increased immigration, total devotion to free market global capitalism.
Is mounting the Free Market First World Country Uber Alles moral high ground, MORE COWS – Udder Alles.
Oh the crowd hate truant children, there’s a cross burning somewhere in the back ground.
Positive, positive, not left or right, but hard right social culture war totes fine.
He’s just listing fantasy ZB talking points now.
OMG – Is this really his speech?
This vapid bullshit is really what he’s doing here?
They’ve had fucking months to write this, how was this the end product?
He’s going on about smashing young crime – this is this a state of the nation election speech?
It’s a ZB morning breakfast show podcast
The tears of a small business owner are now splashing from this speech
‘Addiction to spending’ – you voted with most of the Covid policy eh?
Reserve Bank + Red Tape – National Party Bingo!
He is right about the fear of first time home buyers fearing the mortgage, but there is no way any renter fretting about the landlord raising their rent would talk to Chris because no renter votes National!
Renters aren’t that self hating.
Is righteously trashing Labour’s shitty caution that hasn’t been transformative.
Family Boost for childcare!!!!!
IN YO FACE LABOUR!
BOOM – Chris Luxon showing up the Left with real reduction in child cost care!
Out of know where, boom with the massive state subsidy while decrying all other state subsidies.
Pow.
Suck it Chippy. Suck it hard. Why are National better than Labour on reducing child care costs?
Why Chippy?
WHY?
Burns Chippy over the consultants
Some convoluted funding thing to stop Consultants costing more than the public service?
SHOUT OUT TO THE WORKING GROUP!
He is hammering The Working Group!
Says the consultant gravy train will stop.
I hate myself for loving his argument.
Sure he’s right about consultants, sure we should put more money to make child care free – but the rest of the toxic stew of self interested rich fantasies masquerading as policy are hollow shit.
Probably the least worst speech he’s given.
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Plenty of renters vote National, some people with money prefer the convenience & flexibility that renting affords. I like not having to worry about maintenance, rates etc, and being able to move cities/countries with relative ease. If you rent furnished, then moving becomes a breeze.
Yep, lot of rich pricks out there who can afford to pay those sky high rents.
Helen Beck. Oh oh! This is the WEF party line. Rid yourself of home ownership and all the worries that go with it. So, who ends up calling the tune then? Not the renter.
Some of us have moved between countries in both hemispheres, and both rented and owned, and home buying and owning and maintenance requires a considerable amount of belt tightening, but given the paucity of life-long leases in this country compared to others, then I suggest that placing such a significant part of one’s life in the hands of strangers, is folly. I wouldn’t want their furniture either, thanks all the same, or their decor. All over London are apartments decorated by moi, to my taste, even just for a 12 month rental. The aesthetics of a home can play quite a big part in a family’s well being, did you know ?
So, no, let’s have more choices, and more affordable choices.
I have to say: He’s useless and the reason I vote ACT.
The government figures says we will be 250000 sworkers short by 2035 so where are these coming from if we do not have immegration. They need homes and schools and hospital space but the have to be factored in otherwise the country will go further backwards. These people will come from countries that are used to small apartments so we need to build up not out.
Not all of them. And those who are might arrive because of an aspiration for more. They will live where they can afford to and will earn the same wages we do. And aspire to have land under their feet.
Sure more of such high rise, where there are parks and in build commons – planned communities.
We can just employ locals, instead of leaving them on the scrapheap, like you seem to want them to.
Trevor Bear in mind that most immigrants emigrate hoping to improve upon what they leave behind. Don’t forget that many of the tower blocks built in Britain post WW2 when there was an urgent need for homes, have since been demolished. Back in the 60’s and 70’s the incidence of schizophrenia among their dwellers, was disproportionately high, the social problems already legendary. Many were in fact good, substantial, and private accommodation. The chilly ground-level prefabs built and designated as temporary accommodation, still survive because people like living in them. The quarter-acre sections with which we grew up in New Zealand may be gone, but emulating the concrete jungles of China or the slums of Mumbai to accommodate their flee’ers, may not necessarily be the most socially progressive way to go.
Translation….
So less than 110,000 households only if they are working and have under 5 year old children will receive at the end of a tax year, one rebate per household for childcare subsidy via the detriment of public service cuts. Meanwhile1.3 million plus households get zilch to counter a rising cost of living.
Bureaucrats hire consultants the way health systems hire locums.
It speaks to lack of internal capacity.
When Luxon works out what the solution is listen till then …
Good for the Ford Ranger Families, the rest of us, not so much.
Oh the fucking irony.
Labour and the left generally have an incredibly bad signal to noise ratio. In the current environment, the number of worker bees versus the number of ticket clippers and unproductive numpties.
gnACToids, the neolibs and 3rd wayers have always been enablers of the ticket clipper – they usually not part of that State/Public capacity
Cunningly gnactoids and the right are now taking part of the Polar Flip.
More fool the left. Although it’s not too late. Chips might have to be a (L)ittle more Ruthless.
We’ll get what we deserve and if you don’t like it, get yourself an exit plan
Would you please stop giving banjos a hard time?
Strumming a few chords on a banjo before breakfast puts me in a good mood all day.
Okay. All they need to do now is fire the Excellent Hate Speech Extremists at Victoria University of Wellington, and bring back the Commissioner for Vulnerable Children, and they could romp home. Recalling the Ambassador to Ireland would be the icing on the cake and show Eire that down here we are moderately civilised after all – he could get a job watering apple orchards or decolonising kiwi fruit – retrain as a disc jockey or drive invisible buses up and down Bowen Street, forevermore.