Political Caption Competition

1. Pommie immigrant Key knew what he was doing when he chose lunatic Luxon to be the next PM.

2. “I can make a mockery of Christmas ‘cos I’m sorted and you’re not. “

3. Reversing the Miracle of the Loaves and Fishes, courtesy of crazy Christopher.

4. Ham and vegetables at Premier House, Wellington.

5. Whos my real dad ?

6. Christmas crackers and a tree with big balls.

7. I believe Chris Luxon’s children are grateful they do not resemble him.

8. Hope all the opposition parties turn up in their pyjamas when parliament opens.

   • Pyjamas, tea towels, cowboy hats, hair foliage, giant-sized necklaces, sports shoes and shirts, shop-lifters’ ill-gotten gains, song-and-dance routines, screaming fishwives, escapees from Waikato Uni, cheap shots from the galleries, all thought to impress the dumbos who elect these clowns.

9. Police are not looking for anyone else in relation to this incident but advise persons sighting a black Mercedes to stay indoors and sprinkle themselves with chestnuts roasting round an open fire.

10. Peter Alexander regrets product promo putting bread dough head in his designer pjs.

11. Protection squad miss out on being with own family for Christmas for this fakery ?

    • O’Toole. Unfortunately, someone has to protect the public from this dimwit.

12. Can’t open the resort room curtains?

    Hey Luxie while your in your $500 worth of PJs , we’re still hunting for a home for an eighty year old homeless man.

    Homeless at Christmas compliments of your greedy landlords.

13. Luxon has to be a nutter thinking other families would want or welcome messages from his coterie at Christmas. It’s not just bad taste, it was arrogant and nauseating. He shouldn’t have done it.

14. Health NZs new budget uniforms ( for those that haven’t been laid off by this corrupt government)

15. How common.

    • Ennius. I beg to differ. More vulgar and silly, the latter not being a desirable attribute in any man.

16. Happy for the Luxons. The NZ sentiment/sediment is every NZer should be as happy as them.

    The guy doesn’t understand how that is achieved. The drip drip from the rich doesn’t do it. Heard his ideas about how the neediest are delivered on the radio — trickle-down.

    • That sediment sure does sink low, call it the dregs?

17. I’m reminded of Toto’s St George and the Dragon
    Can you tell me where I might find the Hydra?
    Is he wearing a familiar face?
    Does he still live below Seventh Avenue
    With the princess dipped in lace?…

    I can tell by the look in your eye
    You’ve never seen the man with nothing to say
    I can tell by the look in your eye
    You’d better watch yourself, St. George is on his way…
    https://genius.com/Toto-st-george-and-the-dragon-lyrics
    That’s not us, we’ve plenty to say! But the Lernaen Hydra is something to battle with – from c.700BC and still here! It had poisonous breath and blood so virulent that even its scent was deadly. The Hydra possessed many heads, the exact number of which varies according to the source. Later versions of the Hydra story add a regeneration feature.. for every head chopped off, the Hydra would regrow two heads. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lernaean_Hydra

18. Selective blindness is a great gift to have, and essential if you want to join NZ Police or become the PM. Forget to indicate when changing lanes and you can be in trouble, but electrocute or sexually abuse children in care and hey presto it’s ignored, and there’s nothing to indicate that this status quo will change, in spite of the Royal Commission.
    What’s half a $billion over there wasted on Irex contract break fees, or 2.9 $billion over here that we splurged on investor interest tax deductibility. But since times are tough, we need to increase public transport fares, and the first year free tertiary will now be far better targetted and only reimbursed to students who graduate.
    But of course we won’t be better targetting the 2.9 $billion windfall given to investors, so even those on the rich list, will be getting the full deductibility we think they deserve, through our scroogifying reverse robinhood policies. But wait, there’s more xmas cheer,, why should we have bothered to try and fund more cancer drugs in the first budget, when we can help make some rich listers even richer. Selectice blindness is so wonderful when you’re rich and sorted, te,he,he.

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