MEDIAWATCH: Why is TVNZ spending money on advertising a Māori boy looking for his dad in Scotland?

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Why the fuck is TVNZ getting into the mobil phone market?

They are the Public Broadcaster, this bullshit advert about some Maori fella teenager searching for his Dad amongst the Scottish Highlands is not what their core business should be!

TVNZ should be focused on public broadcasting not broadcasting to the public!

TVNZ can barely do the pittance they are currently doing, why move into mobile phones?

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Their Board should all be sacked for allowing the News and Current Affairs departments to wither and die while allowing Seven Sharp to remain!

A curse on everyone at TVVNZ, what a stupid idea to branch into Mobile Phones!

Wait a moment Sportsfans, my phone is ringing.

Hold on, I’ll get back to this attack on how stupid it is for TVNZ to get into the mobile phone market right after I take this phone call:

“Hello”?

“What”?

“It’s not an advert for TVNZ? What?”

“It’s called One NZ, that’s the TV1 channel name”.

“What”?

“One NZ is Vodaphone”???

“But why would you change your name to one that is immediately confused as the TVOne News network”?

“What sort of cocksucker fuckwit would damage their own brand by naming it something totally eclipsed by an existing brand”?

“Wow”.

Comrades I’ve just been informed that ONE NZ is actually Vodaphone who have decided for reasons beyond comprehension to rename themselves in a way that is automatically confused for TVNZ, so all that hilarious shitting on TVNZ and Vodaphone was wrong of me.

Hilarious though.

 

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7 COMMENTS

  1. Rebranding is the goto for lazy, incompetent BS artist corporate CEOs, COOs and board members. If in doubt – rebrand AND put the costs on the inDEPENDENT contractors where possible.
    Did you really care if your package was delivered by NZ POST in a yellow and red van of a blue and red one?
    Is Woolworths any better now than when it was Countdown?

    Big missed opportunity to have turned Post Offices into all-of-gummint service centres (local and central) and to provide banking services, MSD access, polling booths, IRD, DIA, transport ticketing, and the Munstry for Everything – if some have to be on different days of the week. Especially in rural areas. Note the managerial class never get the chop unless the thing is days away from falling over.
    Enshitification/Crapification. The most unproductive activity known

    The better brands have stuck with their originals over many years

  2. And when he finds his mum she is a romantic setting in the Scottish Highlands – not in a Glasgow backstreet with a needle in her arm.
    Nor in a squalid Edinburgh high rise with three children, all by different, absent fathers.

  3. I don’t think the father was Maori. In the first ad, when his mother daydreams about the interaction she had with the father, he is clearly Black. Even when the parents try to create some culture for him as a child its defiantly not Maori culture.

  4. Jason Paris runs Vodafone (ONE), which should tell you all you need to know. Also, their customer service has been consistently voted the most dismal and soul-destroying experience in the history of telecommunications customer service. If your options are to call ONE customer service, or to repeatedly slam your genitals in a car door, you will derive more enjoyment from the latter every single time. I can count on one hand the interactions I’ve had with them that didn’t result in either crippling depression or a spontaneous explosion of Tourette’s. Everything else has been a relentless cavalcade of misery. They suck harder than an industrial Hoover.

  5. Well, OneNZ are certainly getting a run for their investment. What did the memorable Don Drapper say about the new wave of advertising introduced with TV in the 60s? It’s not about the actual product but about manufacturing the desire. Desire is not quite the focus in the OneNZ ad but ‘the story’ is and the mystery it generates is capturing eveyone’s attention. Loosely it’s all about staying connected. And that’s One NZs core business.

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