BREAKING: Labour Party landslide

1. I’m currently sporting a smile so wide I feel like I’m having a stroke. Suck it, National.

   • I’m going to chill

2. Gerry Brownlee and Nick Smith are both toast! Oh, wondrous day! This has been a long time coming. So happy.

3. No fuck no — Kelvin Davis is dribling. This is like the iron first taking on Thanos…..and winning. Be kind. Use lube. Don’t let me bleed.

   • That’s exactly the kind of narrative I’d expect from an inhuman, human.
     Off you go back to loser national FtT. Love you miss you already.

4. Right. Now that commonsense has finally prevailed….?
   Let’s go and get the fuckers who did this to us?
   roger? yoo hoooo? Where are you little piggy?

5. Bertie/Cindyfan,

   My beloved mistress has taken the remote off me. My kids have been mean even my catholic right wing 12-year old single boys school kid has been laughing. Sleeping with the pug – hopefully we are still team of 5 million.

   Love you all

   Frank

   • Come on Frankie, chin up and look on the bright side…. oh there isn’t any.

     As one aussie commentated…

     “Congratulations to Jacinda Ardern for winning the NZ election with a solid win. She did it by showing strength, leadership, compassion, sincerity and honesty.”

     “sincerity and honesty”, Collins could learn something, right there.

     • Lol. Nothing solid about that win. It was a shitkicking nothing more, nothing less.

6. Labour bowls National.

   Skittles Bowling!
   https://youtu.be/95bLhegYn80?t=14

7. By the way…?
   Chloe Swarbrick winning Auckland Central is beyond fucking awesome.
   You watch that kid? She’s going to be transformative.

   • I reckon, it was an incredible win out of the Blue. Literally. All kudos to Chloe 🙂

8. I am very,very chuffed (for lack of a better word). I live in Hamilton East,which was a long shot for Labour,but they also swung that one. The Rt Hon Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern so deserves this great win. I am also very glad Chloe Swarbrick won Auckland Central,she also totally deserves it. Funnily enough,I feel strangely like Good triumphed over Evil tonight, like in the age old battles in books,movies and stories passed down from generation to generation. I happily indulged in a huge amount of schadenfreude in the solid thrashing National took right across the board.

   I think once special votes etc are sorted,and all is said and done, the final result will be as Jacindafan called it – Labour 52% and National 27%. Now it’s up to Jacinda and Labour to deliver in the next 3 years and transform. I am confident that they will, with her at the helm. It was in the set of her jaw tonight in her speech. She is determined and I, for one, was proud to see history being made here tonight.

9. I think the last word ought to go to our lovely self-appointed “Democracy Mum”. Gracious in defeat as always:

   https://twitter.com/democracymum/status/1317399598487334912

   And in case you’re wondering – this leftie is definitely gloating ;o)

10. Adern will use the mandate precisely how she has used it for the last 3 years.
    Maintaining the same old status quo whilst fucking up everything she touches.
    At least this time she can’t break her promises, because she didn’t really make any.
    Well, except not to tax wealth, capital gains,etc and I will get dollars to donuts she will keep those promises because her primary interest is self interest just like the rest of them.

    • Your a sad little man.

    • You’re a real ray of sunshine, aren’t you mate?

11. Looks like another Neoliberal Austere government for NZ. With no plan to tax the wealthy and no plan to tackle the growing unemployment problem as well as no plan to figure out how to reduce the forecasted $221b debt burden created mainly by QE, printing $700m+ per week, can only mean two things. Tax increases and the axing social services. With nearly 15% unemployed, a collapsing economy, the tax take decreases. Austerity MK11 will be invoked for the rest of the decade in the global depression. Good onyah NZ for voting for more Neoliberalism policies and no idea how to end the nightmare.

12. Thought this was a bad dream – no its not. We lost the party vote on the North shore. Fuuuuckkk.

    • You can’t win all the time, Frank. Even if you’re ‘born to rule’. Don’t despair. That malignant coven of self-serving warlocks will return just as soon as they’ve figured out which mask is most conducive to harvesting votes while disguising their true character. National will rise again. They always do.

13. The fact Chloe won AC and Nick Smith lost Nelson speaks a lot to the potential outcome of the Cannabis referendum. If the referendum passes, it may be our biggest transformation.

14. Tucked away in-between a mountain of staggering numbers is that the party vote for Labour was actually higher than National’s in the Papakura electorate of ………..Judith Collins. If she couldn’t even inspire her own electorate, what hope was there elsewhere?

    Simon Bridges was the only National Party MP to speak of the elephant in the room. He said in the last days of the campaign, National Party MP’s didn’t know what was to be said and not said. My interpretation of that is Judith Collins steered the ship straight into an Iceberg by doing everything her way. The “strong team” were left behind by a non existent campaign plan all about Collins.

    It’s my sincere perspective that Judith Collins conceded the election after the Christchurch debate and only sent a cardboard cutout of herself to the final TVNZ leaders debate. She just couldn’t afford even more people recoiling at her while the wolves circled. For the last period of the campaign Collins had only one goal. Get National’s numbers up to a point she could retain the leadership. Everything she said highlighted that goal. It’s personal political ambition ….gone wrong.

    Anyone who actually believes Collins ran a good campaign is delusional and hasn’t been paying attention. It’s been a disaster of epic proportions. Making statements exactly like they were facts….and then saying they were just jokes and how people should know this by her eyebrow movement. WTAF?

    Her husband used twitter to mock and ridicule Ardern and Collins refused to condemn the conduct because it …….mirrored her own view of My Little Pony.

    Farcical taxcuts paid for by the Covid emergency fund that clearly targeted ACT voters who were leaving National’s sinking ship in droves. They were a cynical vote buying exercise that had zero to do with stimulating the economy and Kiwi’s knew it.

    Her determination to pass herself off as a Christian that even resorted to praying in a church. That was a contrived scene arranged by Collins minders. She could have asked the media to give her privacy but didn’t because the photos they were taking that she would have been 100% aware of, suited her needs.

    Her walkabout in Ponsonby was a disaster. Having to plant your own team members around the walk “supporting her” so the area didn’t look like a level 4 lockdown was a brutally exposed epic fail. Same applies with her utterly pointless crusade against the obese that was only ever going to alienate people. Collins had clearly run out of ideas and desperately resorted to abusing Ardern repeatedly by calling her a liar.

    Her statement about the Auckland Council backfired on her via a damaging leaked email. Collins described it as her showing leadership. Everyone else saw it for what it was. Another epic fail.

    I believe the most damaging aspects relating to Collins for whatever reason were not even spoken of during the campaign. Her strong family and business connections with China and her diabolical link with Cameron Slater and her history with Dirty Politics.

    All Collins did during her campaign was prove NZ was right not to trust her.

    The most unexpected moment of the night for me came from…….Christopher Luxon. Despite the river of blood on the floor, he told Jesse Mulligan he thought Collins had done an incredible job as leader and was looking forward to working under her. WTAF? If he now rolls Collins on Tuesday, he will look like NZ’s biggest liar who’s words are worth….ZERO. He should have said nothing apart from lets see how everything comes out in the wash after the dust settles etc. It was a remarkable fail from Luxon who’s complete naivety was on show for all to see.

    Collins can’t possibly survive this train wreck. Her strong team will be campaigning against her right now and she will be gone on Tuesday. Luxon can’t take over after last night so that only leaves one possible candidate. Mark Mitchell. I’d wager a significant sum on this outcome.

    Collins will be outraged and will inevitably play the victim. Live by the sword etc. Her retirement from politics announcement will soon follow. A By-election for Papakura will unfold in March next year. That will be her parting shot and revenge to those who had the audacity to replace her.

    • Luxon was just proving his credentials for National Party leadership. Even when you’re haemorrhaging so badly you’re likely to pass out from blood loss, claim you’re a box of birds and you’ve never felt better. As for Collins, she’s basically a fly-blown carcass waiting for the jackals to show up. Dead-woman-walking. Couldn’t happen to a more deserving sack of spite and venom, to be honest.

      Me, I’m over the fucking moon that the voting public, for once in their damn lives, saw National and Collins for what they are, and voted accordingly. Had we done otherwise, the entire globe would have wondered at our mental competency (especially given some of the awful specimens they’re lumbered with right now.) You don’t get a leader like Jacinda Ardern very often. We need to keep her for as long as we possibly can.

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