Those paying for their quarantine will be the wealthy boomers who want to flit and flirt around their global bubble for a wee break because lockdown has been so stressful darling.
If you are still holidaying globally, fuck you.
And if it’s for business, zoom instead.
And if you are a ‘Get ahead Karen’, sorry your trans-national commute became less frivolous.
If there’s been a death or an emergency, or if you are returning home, it’s still free as it should righteously be.
So this policy hits all the right people while exempting all those who deserve to be exempt.
It also calms the blood thirsty Nuzilind masses who view their self sacrifice during lockdown as the greatest thing any living NZer has done since storming the beaches of Gallipoli. Their snarling hatred towards the ambitious diaspora returning home after trying to make it big in Hollywood is the Tall Poppy syndrome on low grade homebaked meth.
Labour have decided the most deserving target of that snarling toxic solidarity are wealthy boomers living their snow coloured haircut best lives and travelling for a chance to recharge their batteries.
The only thing that takes this more perfect is listening to Barry Soper cry his delicious tears that he and his jet setting family won’t be able to afford their privilege any longer.
Perfect. Just fucking perfect.
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