Political Caption Competition


Where’s your pet lump of coal dickhead?


  1. “You know, the miracle Jacinda is that I can deport as many Australians to New Zealand as I want and you will not retaliate”

  2. “Some people think I’m vacuous when I smile for photo op’s Scotty. What do you think? Yeah maaate, theyre not wrong Princess!”

  3. JA “Glad my country is New Zealand. You..?”

    “Got time for a beer and a Barbie after this photo op Scomo?”
    ” Feeling lucky now bro Scomo?”

  4. “If you keep sending us your criminal scum I will rip your face off!”….. “I’m literally shaking in my boots”

  5. Are these hideous armchairs made from the few remaining animals left, from the 1 billion animals burned alive in the bush fires, Scotty?

    No Cindy, these chairs are 100% made from polyester and the oil is mined from the Timor Sea which we stole from the East Timorese during our dual massacre of them with the Indonesians!

    Well, Scotty that does not sound like a kind face. That’s why I have the Time cover, because in NZ we let the Asian middle class nationals robbed by countries like OZ come into NZ to become dual residents.
    We are their glimmer of hope and reward for saying nothing, after their countries have been raped and pillaged by the Davo’s crowd.

    Cindy, your country is so hospitable I’m thinking of sending more of OZ undesirables to your shores.

    We’d welcome that Scotty, no foreign criminal left behind is our NZ policy and kind face. We are building prisons to triple our capacity knowing that demand is gonna be high in the future and have increased hard ship grants for all our working poor because our taxes are being diverted to more prisons not solving poverty.

    Your policy is an inspiration to the neoliberal world, Cindy! Can we send out Coronavirus quarantine to NZ too, as we don’t want the risk in OZ.

    No problem, Scotty. Our kind face to foreigners, is more important to us than our own local’s safety and I’m sure we can cram a few more, into our hospitals if we get a pandemic.

    Thanks, Cindy. I love theses little international collaborations where NZ takes our scumbags and problems away.

    It’s our pleasure, Scotty.

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