You can take my Fireworks from my dead cold hands


Remember, remember, the Fifth of November
Gunpowder treason and plot
I see no reason why gunpowder treason
Should ever be forgot

I’m sorry for your pets.

I’m sorry for the Firefighters.

I’m sorry for those with children sensitive to loud bangs.


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Once a year, I love letting off fireworks.

I am considerate and only use Fireworks once a year so pet owners, Firefighters and parents of children who are sensitive to loud bangs all know that November 5th is the one night of the year that I let fireworks off.

Sure, we should have more public firework displays, but I enjoy doing it in my backyard while my daughter laughs and jumps and leaps and yells at the explosions.

I like celebrating the concept of blowing up Parliament, I like the idea that people shouldn’t be frightened of their Governments and that Governments should be frightened of their people.

Guy Fawkes is political rebellion and in a muzzled society that symbolism of rebellion is more desperately needed than ever before.

Because I’m being considerate I won’t even mention the wimpish culture of wimps who want to safety wrap the planet in bubble wrap and who are so desperate to rob the simple joy of backyard fireworks.

To those folk I say, you can take my Fireworks from my dead cold hands.

Happy Guy Fawkes everyone.


  1. A double celebration with Maggie Barry bailing out … and little children’s laughter is among the loveliest sounds in the world.

  2. In my day … families let off fireworks sensibly in their back yards. We even had a bonfire – but only on Nov 5. The problem now is that as soon as they go on sale they are let off and in large quantities. It has become the ‘bad’ thing to do. And then add Diwali plus at least a week after Guy Fawkes. I can put up with it – my cat and other pets get hugely stressed. It’s a matter of public safety and animal welfare Martyn.

  3. I am well experienced with handling such explosives also, for fun, of course.

    Do not drive us underground, it will have BAD consequences.

  4. “Unt your name vill also go on zee list” -uboat kaptain, Dad’s army. But I sort of agree with you Martyn.

  5. Hey Bomber i am in total agreement.

    I remember the days when we had double happys and tom thumbs which did encourage some very silly antics but shit it was fun which is why it has become a lot more safer than the days of the thunder bolts and those ones that were attached to the washing line or fence when Mum was not looking.

    I always had fireworks for my kids every year and there was great delight in betting how long it would be before the old man burned himself in the adrenaline rush of lighting the next one and so on.
    We had a bonfire in later years when we lived rural in Northland which always made it a night too remember.

    The public displays are awesome but it doesn’t replace that special occasion for the kids and that first sparkler of the night.

  6. Sorry to reign on your parade but Guy Fawkes is not a celebration of the concept of blowing up parliament. It’s actually quite the opposite. It’s the celebration of the government catching guy fawkes and his accomplices, (they were betrayed to the authorities) and preventing them from blowing up parliament.

    • Good point. Guy Fawkes is lame. There are lots of other reasons we need fireworks. Chinese New Year, New Years eve, Matariki, my birthday.

      Lots of irresponsible idiots around these days. Maybe it should be licenced. Firearms owners have already proven themselves to be Fit and proper, that would be a good start.

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