Hadley Robinson-Lewis: In 2019 women live in fear.


In 2019 women live in fear.

Women are afraid to walk alone after dark, or at any time for that matter. I remember being 16 years old and going for a jog in a safe Auckland neighborhood mid-morning. A car with a few men in their 30s started following me and attempting to coerce me to get into the car. I’m grateful I was a good sprinter so I immediately ran all the way home. The saddest aspect of the incident was that I wasn’t surprised, we’ve always been taught to be wary of men and that ‘boys will be boys’.

The thought even ran through my head that, maybe I shouldn’t mention what happened as people will think I’m a liar or a man-hater. I wish women felt safe to speak up about incidents involving men without the fear of being judged.

In 2019 women also need to protect themselves from incels (a group of men online that believe that as men they are owed sex by women). It’s terrifying that incel men believe they are owed a woman whether she wants him or not. Who would want to be with someone that doesn’t want them?

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I also can’t forget the Alabama abortion ban. This simply confirms there is a war on women.
Even if a woman is raped in Alabama and gets pregnant she still may not abort. Imagine co-parenting with your rapist.

All I ask of men now is that you call each other out and protect women. Protect the girls and women that you care for in your life.

Women need allies now more than ever.



ABOUT HADLEY GRACE ROBINSON-LEWIS: I’m based in Ōtepoti and my iwi is Ngāi Tahu. I’m an RN, social activist and vice chair for NZNO/TR in the southern region. I’m passionate about psychotherapy, philosophy, charity, social activism and Māori health. My greatest achievement was raising $25,000 for a women’s refuge in Auckland with Habitat for Humanity.


  1. I desire that every man/male constantly remember that HE OWES LIFE TO A WOMAN – his MOTHER. I desire that every man/male constantly remember that EVERY WOMAN/girl in his life is worthy of respect (minimally) and compassion, because every woman/girl has the potential to give LIFE to others. Every woman who births babies into the world experiences considerable physical pain in doing so. Most women experience such pain joyfully. I have never encountered a man/male who experenced pain in that way. No man/male can carry/birth a child. Without women on Earth, the human species becomes extinct! I am a widely experienced NZ Registered Nurse/MaternityNurse.

  2. Correct, Hadley. White men are feeling dumped on, and so do all women.

    I could document some of it happening to older women, and am unsure where this polarisation is coming from, but someone’s wound the clock back.

  3. I don’t like how public sentiment imply’s very clearly that there is a pathological problem that is yet undefined between the sexes. Courts face problems of wrongfully convicting innocent people of rape and so on while at the same time talking up there virtues and prowess is at keeping woman safe ect. So I think we do need new rules. Perhaps make society more uniform and less human.

  4. Yes you are correct, unfortunately. There is a massive amount of “hard men” out there with ott macho rhetoric and posturing in front of “the boys”. I see it every day at the workplace. I think it’s caused by undeveloped brain syndrome

    • If your first move is to use “posturing” and “machoness” then you will lose the fight. Perhaps posturing and machoness can rise to the top in some small select fields but not all.

      • Posturing and Machoness are outward signs of insecurity and the afformentioned U.B.S possibly due to a shortage of intelligent response available.

    • What makes you an authority on what dribble is? Is it experience or theory that makes you knowledgable on the subject? Asking for a mate.

    • “Ms Ardern said 1,000,000 people – including 300,000 children – were victims of family and sexual violence each year in New Zealand.”

      Dribble, Jays. Really ? When NZ now leads the world in children killing themselves, and NZ Women’s Refuges are bursting at the seams ?

  5. I’m sorry that so many women have this kind of experience.
    But though this would seem to disagree with the statistic Snow White quotes from Jacinda, My sense is that the problem is being caused by quite a small percentage of the male population. But that these relatively few abuse a very large number of different women. Like one or several every evening for much of their lives.
    With the internet as a magic tool perhaps women should use it to create a sort of register for every unpleasant incident that is experienced , short of criminality. It would indicate not only who is offending and so to be avoided, but also give a quantitative assessment of what proportion of men offend. It might improve the overall view of men.
    D J S

  6. Alabama politicians are not really that concerned about life–the state executes prisoners! Also once babies are born that is seemingly not their concern either.

    25 White Republican men in State Govt. banned abortion to control women, simple as that. Just as authoritarian reactionaries everywhere try to control women’s bodies and lives.

    NZ has a Rape Culture, and men have to do something about that. Don’t harass, discriminate, put down, bully, objectify–let alone rape–Women!

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