TV REVIEW: Ummmm, about Married At First Sight NZ complaints

By   /   February 25, 2018  /   17 Comments

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Contestants blaming ‘Married At First Sight’ for a lack of scientific rigour makes a drowning man  clutching at straws look responsible and rational.  

But, but, where’s my science?

I don’t watch Married At First Sight because, well you know, I have a fucking life and there isn’t enough cannabis and alcohol on the face of the planet that could make the pure inane hot messness of a show where people marry each other at first sight palatable to my entertainment needs.

So I don ‘t care about this show, the contestants on this show, the people who watch the show, the technicians and behind the scenes camera people who make this show,  the advertisers who sponsor this show or the pixels that are required to create the image that the screen sends out to our eyeballs.

I do however note with a side splitting hilarity the complaints from contestants that Mediaworks didn’t provide them with the relationship scientists to make this a journey into true love scientifically respectable…

‘It was a joke’: Married at First Sight contestant backs Haydn Daniels’ claims

Another Married at First Sight NZ participant has challenged the process for matching couples on the show as one of her fellow-participants prepares for a court case arising from his involvement on the popular reality series.

Lacey Swanepoel claims that she never got to meet the Married at First Sight  “experts” who were promoted as providing match-making advice before the series began, and didn’t receive testing to help identify her best partner. 

Her claims follow the complaints of fellow participant Haydn Daniels, who has launched legal action to have his made-for-TV marriage annulled.

Daniels has applied to the Family Court, where he will argue his marriage should not have gone ahead because he was convinced that scientific methods would be used to find his perfect match, but that never transpired.  “I did not give true consent to be married in this situation,” his affidavit reads.

..first of all, this is ‘Mediaworks’, home of cheapness. Remember The Batchelor episode where all the woman sat around with plastic champagne flutes to fill in plot gaps? Expecting Mediaworks to spend actual money on any of the cheap knock off overseas versions of reality shows they regurgitate is like waiting for Judith Collins to win the Noble Peace Prize or The SpinOff to stop sounding so undeservedly smug.

The thing that makes me giggle the most is these contestants actually believing that science is somehow going to save them from this train wreck.

I’m no expert in human relationships, but I think that if you are so desperate to appear on a TV show called ‘Married At First Sight’, science is the least of your concerns.

Blaming the lack of science when you have scrapped the barrel of public humiliation is like a Buddhist crying out to Allah for forgiveness.

Contestants blaming ‘Married At First Sight’ for a lack of scientific rigour makes a drowning man  clutching at straws look responsible and rational.




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  1. CLEANGREEN says:

    Martyn said “I’m no expert in human relationships, but I think that if you are so desperate to appear on a TV show called ‘Married At First Sight’, science is the least of your concerns.”

    I couldn’t agree more with you Martyn.

    These mindless shows are just a false distraction as serious shit goes on still in our whole lives.

  2. Christ almighty, I grow weary of these “reality” (!!!) tv shows.

    Broadcast hard-core porn and be done with it. No more scrambling for “edgier” and “edgier” tv programming to win ratings. Sorted.

    I mean, let’s not beat about the bush – that’s what “reality” TV is; a coy version of voyeurism.

    • MattyGee says:

      OMG remember Big Brother…? pure vomit

    • Nitrium Nitrium says:

      Reality TV is both cheap to produce and incredibly popular. Just look at the weekly Nielsen ratings in the TV Guide. Other than Shortland Street the Top 15 is entirely made up of News, Reality TV, Gameshows, and the odd documentary. All of these are “reality” in one form or another. You can complain endlessly about “reality TV”, but factually it’s what people watch – especially that key demographic of 18-30 year olds who have both disposable income and can still be influenced by advertising. Also just be glad we don’t have even worse garbage like “Opposite World”:

      • Siobhan says:

        I don’t actually own a TV, but when ever I visit various relatives I get the impression that reality tv is all thats on offer.
        These are people who would happily watch quality drama and docos…thats what they used to watch, plus a few soaps, but now they sit there watching all this reality gunk, and something they seem to call ‘News”, though why i don’t know.
        They are, infact, so disengaged that they often watch TV with the sound off, and even when it is on it quickly becomes apparent that they aren’t actually listening.
        Thing with humans…offer them shinny crap and they will soak it up…offer them quality programs of interest…and they will soak that up equally.
        A responsible progressive government takes control of some media…for the betterment of the population, the same way government controls education and health.

      • Strypey says:

        Ratings reflect people’s choices among the options available, not what they *want* to watch. If only TV ratings could somehow include all the TV shows that people watch through other media, the results would be very different. You know, all the stuff people binge watch on DVD or streaming services, or download as torrents, because they don’t want to watch the garbage free-to-air channels serve up, especially the almost 50% of that air time taken up by ads and sponsorship messages.

        If almost every aisle at the supermarket was filled with variations on human faeces, it would hardly surprising if a lot of people ate shit. That doesn’t mean it’s good for them, or that we shouldn’t put pressure on the supermarket to offer something less gross and more nutritious to their customers. I owe this charming mental images to Ozzie stand-up comic Steve Hughes:

  3. mary_a says:

    Cheap, nasty nauseating stuff! No intelligence value whatsoever, which public broadcasting should be about.

  4. MattyGee says:

    Probably the funniest post by MB I’ve read in ages!! Keep up the great work Bomber

  5. countryboy says:

    Fabulous Post @ MB. I had a laugh right when I needed it most man. When I win lotto I’ll shower you in Ferraris. Or beard clippers. What ever. It’s yours.

  6. countryboy says:

    This for you all who’re in the groove.

    Get down baby….

  7. esoteric pineapples says:

    I’ve always thought it is ironic that people are up in arms about same sex marriage but don’t complain about a tv show where heterosexual couples marry each other without having met before. If anything demeans marriage, that show does.

  8. Cassie says:


    I QUIT TV 7 yrs ago.

    (Started to question, started to realise there’s ALWAYS a DIFFERENT side of any Story from PREPROCESSED & FED to general public, via Mainstream “NEWS”.





    = Z E R O.

    To improve LIFE for HUMANITY. (In fact they’ve made life WORSE.)



    RESIST ALL and any of today’s “DO IT ONLINE” (tricks)

    There are MULTIPLE these days, (eg “Staying Online with your doctor just got easier”)



    (UNLESS you are bought by a large salary , then you DONT CARE. What happens to rest of people.)

  9. Historian Pete says:

    I watch “Married at first sight” and I have a very busy life. I watch it from an anthropological point of view, much like Richard Attenborough hiding in a bush and gawking at the antics of the” Gorillas in the Mist”, or an amorous chimpanzee on date night! The Homo Sapien, when put in a position of extreme stress, is hilarious. It is amazing that people can be found that will subject themselves to such publuc humiliation. And , I know that this suggests that 2000 years ago I would have been found in Rome lining up at the Colosseum to see further insanity !!!