The Northland Age? Sounds like the Victorian Age…
In my view, she should never have been in Gable Tostee’s apartment. If she had observed even a modicum of the social mores of previous generations she would not have been there. To the pre-Tinder generation, it is inconceivable that any woman would behave as Warriena Wright did. Seven minutes after meeting this awful man she was in his home, drinking to the point of gross intoxication, removing her clothing and indulging in sex. This with a man who she had never met before, who she did not know, yet whose behaviour she could have predicted.
…this boomer editorial picked up by the NZ Herald seemed to epitomise the sudden weird morality stick being used to whack Millennials with in the wake of the tragic death of Warriena Wright.
Firstly, surely the point of a genuinely progressive society is the autonomous ability of all its members to make choices for themselves? Wright’s autonomy to consent to deciding to meet Gable Tostee is exactly the type of society we trying to aim for, so the moralistic tone of condemnation seems less interested in her right to do as she pleases and more to do with generational chips on silver tinted shoulders.
The irony of Boomers or Gen Xers who revelled in their drunken and drugged up hedonism lecturing a generation who are actually statistically far less promiscuous as their elders makes the attempted lecturing pretty condescending.
All this Tinder angst comes across like technophobes who devalue the role of social media in younger peoples lives as less valuable than their rose tinted days of courtship.
The world has thankfully moved on from rum and coke, Old Spice and blatant domestic violence.
Focusing on the supposed morality in all of this eclipses what I really think the Wright/Tostee story confronts us with.
Toxic individualism.
One of the things we don’t like to talk about when it comes to domestic violence is the incredibly high level of women hitting men. In the Dunedin Multidisciplinary Health and Development Study, 27% of women and 34% of men said they had experienced one act of physical violence from their partner in the last year.
We focus on domestic violence from men being the problem because the strength they have means the damage is far greater. Any attempt to look at the role of women hitting men first and men reacting suggests a defence to the domestic violence, which is of course not the intention of the Dunedin Multidisciplinary Health and Development Study, but when you are living with decades of domestic violence underfunding and wide spread rape culture, righteous fury engulfs this issue with a scorched earth result.
I think that level of calling out and shaming anyone who steps out of Twitter orthodoxy stops us examining the effects of this toxic cult of individualism on everyone. not just men,
Tostee’s narcissistic need to record his latest Tinder conquest while gross, gave us a terrible insight into the toxic individualism that so dreadfully seemed to stain both of these people. Wright’s sudden and violent change of attitude towards Tostee that erupted in her throwing rocks at his head and attacking him speaks to a toxic individualism where the hollowness of modern living purges itself after the desire for choice has spent.
The Tostee/Wright case is not a moralistic tale of irresponsible millennial lusts, it is a reflection of the very consumer culture values neoliberalism has spent 30 years breeding.
Helen Kelly talked of kindness as the most important political vale.
Any movement that wishes to counter neoliberal hyper individualism must adopt Helen’s mantra.
The loneliness that propelled these two people together is the true question here.
I think you’ll find the same sort of story chiselled in stone about the invention of smoke signals. Nothing is new.
Most of the awful trends we witness are symptomatic of western societies being deliberately broken by corporations (and by politicians who act as agents for corporations) for short-term profit. Each day that passes western societies become more toxic and more unsustainable.
There’s no stopping any of it because there are no political leaders who are prepared to challenge the system, and challenge from the outside the system is totally ineffective.
Change -when it does come- will be in response to a major catastrophe (or a set of catastrophes) involving unravelling of fiat currencies, abrupt climate change, and energy depletion.
All one can do is disengage as much as possible, keep a careful eye on it all from a distance, and be as prepared as possible for the inevitable collapse.
Yeah ‘short term’ its interesting isn’t it do you think they know whats coming on the horizon???
Fuck the Herald
@ SAM. Fuck the herald indeed. Dirty, dull, little rag covered in ticks. If it were printed on toilet paper? It’d finally be of some value.
+100…people should unsubscribe to the Herald and any other large newspapers that peddle corporate anti people crap
….and just take secondhand copies from friends or family..or beg, borrow steal the occasional one when it is dated and ready to be thrown out
…newspapers are on the back foot now
…they can’t afford to offend anyone except our oppressors
“The irony of Boomers or Gen Xers who revelled in their drunken and drugged up hedonism lecturing a generation who are actually statistically far less promiscuous as their elders makes the attempted lecturing pretty condescending.”
This “boomer” against the younger ones narrative may suit some, I find it as redundant as the prejudice that some dish out, for instance in that article.
But is this the view of ALL “boomers”? I doubt it. There has always been a sentiment among older generations, that given their “experiences” they know better, so can “advise” or even lecture younger ones. It seems to be built into our genetic makeup and that is reflected in thinking and talking.
The same will have been young once themselves, and will have had as little control over their passions and urges, including sex drive, so will have done much of the same as so many teens or twens may do now, as they ever did.
I consider though, NOT ALL older people think and talk like this, not all “boomers” own property, not all “boomers” are rich, privileged and powerful.
So that is my bit on this, thanks.
Shit Martyn That woke my brain up from my dizzy senior years (72) and I will say that I did indulge in lots of boozing while in my 20s to 40s but had a stoke and chemical poisoning and now don’t drink as much as I’d like to but the brain doesn’t buzz like it did then and I don’t enjoy it much now.
As for sex well if I can perform I’d be happy to but gone the same way as the booze to sadly.
I feel for todays kids as we live in a very draconian authoritarian life now so the kids will rebel as I would have when faced with this almost authoritarian Junta we are ruled by now so I am with anyone who will fight the authoritarian elite now.
I am as they say, “once a rebel, always a rebel”
@ SAM. Fuck the herald indeed. Dirty, dull, little rag covered in ticks. If it were printed on toilet paper? It’d finally be of some value.
Say what ? What’s this odd behaviour of the comments box then?
Is something fishy here?
The Boomers were no better than the Millennials. Does no one remember miniskirts, drugs (especially LSD and cannabis), no bras, sexual freedom/orgies and Woodstock? These Boomers judging Millennials are clearly suffering from selective Alzheimer’s with regard to their own generation.
The really good thing about “back in our day” is that all that debauchery was done behind closed doors.
Even better the law legitimised violence against children and the Mrs.
It sure as shit wasn’t all barn dances and going to the flicks, that’s for sure but we like to pretend it was an adventure from the Famous Five.
100% I could not have said this better Afewknowthetruth
Trump is also suffering because of Corporate backlash & wrath as Hillary Clinton is their stool pigeon too.
See what the Las Vegas said today in defence of trump a good statement and so true eh Martyn.
Trump is now opening his own TV network to tell the truth about corporate greed and power. this is good for us as it will expose Key as another corporate Stool Pigeon as Afewknowthetruth says rightly.
Adelson’s Review-Journal Gives Trump First Major Endorsement
“History tells us that agents for reform often generate fear and alarm among those intent on preserving their cushy sinecures,” the paper said.
Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump landed his first major newspaper endorsement Sunday as the Las Vegas Review-Journal proclaimed its support for the embattled nominee.
“History tells us that agents for reform often generate fear and alarm among those intent on preserving their cushy sinecures,” the paper said.
Don’t worry about it Martyn. Morality is a relative commodity.
John Key took the moral high ground when it came to sex in a handicapped toilet by an All Black (but forgot about is own transgressions with a waitress’s hair, and his own brown-nosing in the AB’s changing room).
The Herald have jumped to the moral high ground with Gable Tostee, (but will serve up gobshite click-bait if anything like bad news against their political masters, the National Party, is likely to embarrass anyone).
I watched the Q&A programme and watched Michelle Boag be an apologist for everything National, even calling Simon Bridges a ‘Maori woman’, (while ignoring the fact that ACC should be reducing ACC premiums and paying out for legitimate claims, rather than being an ersatz investment branch of the National Party).
I watched the Q&A programme and watched Michelle Boag ignoring the fact that National fucked up the Auckland mayoralty by splitting the vote (rather than commenting on the fact that the Super Fund is now being used to prop up Housing New Zealand’s coffers and being an ersatz investment branch of the National Party).
Soon ACC and the Super Fund will be re-branded an SOE and half of it will be sold off to “mum and dad and the kids” opportunity to invest in the future of NuZild.
We should be called New Africa, not New Zealand, with our emblem, ostriches that hide their heads in the sand, instead of proud kiwis that once stood for an egalitarian paradise by being the first democracy to give women the vote.
I’d say Gable Tostee’s profile on Tinder will be pretty well stuffed.
Let’s just hope he stays off Grinder, for the sake of any politicians, who have a legitimate fear of heights and an irrational fear of being taped during foreplay and during cigar smoking post-coital bliss.
+100…he is a psychopath and not an example of typical millennials…and goodness knows how he threatened her in ways that were not recorded
Very valid comments, if “The Northland Age” wants to hold to old fashioned values it should apply to both individuals. When he took her home he was responsible for her safety, we have health & safety laws that have extreme measures so workers do not fall from any ladder over 2 steps high yet it is alright to put a vulnerable lady in a position where she fell to her death. I fear that many who have taken the view that you have written against that she should not have been there claim christian values yet they are doing the work of the Devil (Rev 12:10), to reject their views you only need to tell them to read John 8:1-11. While I understand you have no time for religion I get annoyed when people claim to hold Christian values yet their actions are totally opposite to Christ.
So true Martyn. It is the Individualism in society that is the issue here. Community is gone in western society as we get more dog eat dog. A major change is needed to make a cohesive society again. First step get rid of neo liberal policies.
The right to behave autonomously must also include the right to act immorally, provided the action in question does not infringe the rights of others. However autonomous immorality is still immoral, and the Northland Age is right to deplore immorality where it sees it.
https://bornagainminimalist.com/2016/10/17/the-gaslighting-of-millennials/
+100 CASTRO …great link to article on millennials …they need all the help they can get…life is tough for them …but they have so much going for them as people ( I know because I have two of them as children…and they and their friends are fantastic!)
This from the article:
…”Most millennials I know struggle with mental illness to some degree. Anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, and more. I wonder how much of that anxiety comes from being told that wanting a living wage, affordable college, or adequate healthcare means that you’re being a spoiled entitled brat. It really doesn’t. The generations before us HAD a living wage, affordable college, and adequate healthcare. But now, inflation has far surpassed the minimum wage, college tuition and loan interest rates are through the proverbial roof, and medical bills are the top cause of bankruptcy in America…
The Tostee/Wright case is not a moralistic tale of irresponsible millennial lusts, it is a reflection of the very consumer culture values neoliberalism has spent 30 years breeding.
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