Slap in face


This week, a fake pink penis pricked the Prime Minister’s bubble. After failing to consult with Maori over TPP, tensions at Waitangi were running so high, John Key flagged the event. Turns out he dodged a dildo. There had been talk of someone getting a slap in the face but no one, especially Steven Joyce as it transpired, could have foreseen the rubber cockslap in the face that was about to take the world by storm.

Just when the country should be basking in the afterglow of signing the TPP, Josie Butler took the matter into her own hands and flung a rubber sex toy and herself into world political protest history.

Here is a representative selection of world headlines: Steven Joyce to go down in history as ‘Dildo Baggins’. New Zealand politician hit in face with sex toy by protestor. Flying penis slaps-down NZ MP Steven Joyce in Trans Pacific Partnership protest. This NZ politician was just hit by a pink fake penis. World reaction to Joyce’s stiff opposition. WATCH: Unbelievable moment politician gets smacked in the face with sex toy. The serious reason a New Zealand politician had a sex toy thrown at his face. Steven Joyce and #dildogate: Internet goes into overdrive. Flying Pink Dildo Hits Politician In The Face During Presser. TPP protester boldly chucks dildo at Steven Joyce at Waitangi. Dildo thrown at MP’s mouth for ‘raping sovereignty’. Politician Gets Smacked In The Face By Giant Pink Dildo On Live TV And Takes It Like A Champ. Un ministre reçoit un godemichet dans la tête en pleine interview pour la télé néo-zélandaise. Minister bekommt Dildo ins Gesicht geworfen. A véleménynyilvánítás új módja? Vibrátorral dobták arcon a minisztert.

The coverage was extensive and hilarious with perhaps the New York Post’s vivid retelling the most lurid: “New Zealanders have a unique way with expressing themselves through protest: This time, it features an economic development minister — and a flying dildo. … It slapped against his lips and bounced off a nearby reporter’s breasts — before falling limply at their feet…The Minister took it on the chin — before making a quick withdrawal. Social media immediately erupted into a frenzy of witty quips. #dildogate and Steven Joyce surged into the top trends. When asked if this was a first for him, Joyce began: “Yes, it would be fair to say, under any circumstances …”He then quipped: “It would be unfortunate for being known for this incident.” Too late.”

Was it a good look for the nation on its national day? Of course, I could be biased but I don’t remember a single piece condemning the protester or New Zealand. If anything, there was more sneaking admiration than condemnation. As one American commentator wrote for, “George W. Bush was famously attacked with flying shoes. So was Hillary Clinton. William Kristol was hit in the face with a cream pie. Last month, Donald Trump barely escaped being hit with tomatoes. The takeaway? American projectiles are lame. In order to see how it’s really done, we have to travel by video to New Zealand where Minister Steven Joyce was hit in the face this week with a flying rubber dildo hurled by a protester”.

The original, unique and innovative nature of the protest generated the wit and tweets of wags across the world and the protestor’s aim won wide praise and respect. More importantly, her words were heard and reported alongside the image: “That’s for raping our sovereignty.”

Only one person on the planet didn’t see the funny side. AS TVNZ reported, John Key said the ” ‘juvenile’ sex toy throw (is) not a great look for New Zealand” He was “appalled that people around the world have seen images of a sex toy being thrown at a senior New Zealand politician attending Celebrations for our national day. The Prime Minister said the sex toy thrown at Economic Development Minister Steven Joyce yesterday was “crude and basic” behaviour at what is essentially a family occasion. “That’s the image that’s now gone worldwide … it isn’t the right image for New Zealand”.

Of course, John Key knows something about great looks for New Zealand. His own juvenile antics and inappropriate actions have hit the global headlines with a disturbing regularity. Surely you remember “John Key’s ‘prison rape’ stunt goes international. New Zealand prime minister John Key criticised for ‘rape joke’ stunt. New Zealand Prime Minister John Key slammed after taking part in ‘prison rape joke’ stunt on live radio using a bar of soap. New Zealand PM John Key under fire for participating in ‘prison rape’ radio joke. John Oliver – John Key the Ponytail Puller. #PonyTailGate: People post awkward pictures of NZ Prime Minister John Key touching girls’ ponytails on social media. New Zealand’s ponytail-pulling PM gets a dressing down on Twitter. John Oliver thinks John Key’s ‘wees’ interview is amazing.”

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After his ‘family-friendly’ prison rape jokes and admission to shower-pissing, it was impossible for the PM to take the moral high ground. Worse, when the rest of the world (even, to his great good credit, Steven Joyce) could see the funny side, he came across as a humourless hypocrite. On New Zealand’s national day, as the world joined with us to celebrate a little harmless rubber sex toy humour at a pompous politician’s expense, he alone, lemon-lipped, secreted in some bunker under Eden Park, berated his country. His was the only bad review. He talked his country down. On its national day. For many, that was not a great look New Zealand.

It was his second public appearance that many thought was not a great look for New Zealand. At the TPP signing, the PM wore a lapel pin featuring the red, black and blue flag of John Keyland. Meanwhile, outside on the streets, many hundreds, perhaps thousands waved or wore the current flag of New Zealand. There were no reports of any sightings of the John Keyland flag. Not a single solitary sighting. Not one. None. Nada. Nil. Nought. Zip. Zero. Zilch. As David Fisher in the NZ Herald reported,  there “wasn’t a single Kyle Lockwood flag to be seen. Above the crowds protesting the signing of the Trans-Pacific Partnership agreement were plenty of the current New Zealand flag, the tino rangatiratanga, United Tribes flag and the Mana Party banners. But not a single fern on black, blue or red.” But why should there be? New Zealand and John Keyland are two different places. One is real and the other imaginary. One has a long history of standing up for what it believes and the other a short history of standing up for….standing up for….well, let’s just leave it at a short history.

In the Bay of Plenty Times, Rosie Dawson-Hewes thought “Key’s fern flag pin at TPP signing insensitive.” She wrote “This week, Mr Key stood in front of the world as New Zealand’s representative. He was representing you and me on that stage. Except his insistence on wearing a flag, that hasn’t been selected by me or you, meant he didn’t represent us at all.”

That has been the emerging narrative of TPP: John Key doesn’t represent us at all. That was certainly the message of the protests that shut down central Auckland for five hours. That was the message of the massive march down Queen Street and back up to Federal Street.

According to Mohsin Siddiqui in an article for The Vineyard Saker, that day “was a good day to be out and about in Auckland. A bouquet of human values was on display that is usually confined to that, overtly distorted, place called ‘personal space’ in this ever shrinking public space. The protests in Auckland were anticipated by the vast majority of the population in this truly unique Island in the Pacific. There is an almost electrifying blend of people from all walks of life who came out to voice their dissent. To their credit the people were 100% peaceful with their protest and civil disobedience. Men, women, children and the elderly marched in solidarity cheerful, hopeful and dignified as their rights were being signed away at a casino. The government decided to sign a fundamentally undemocratic treaty in the one place they could. The policemen kept the peace and somewhere in their stares into the abyss one could see them struggling to contain their own outrage at this farce. Most policemen were calm, friendly and jovial.”

There were no arrests. It was 100% peaceful. A bouquet of human values. An almost electrifying blend of people from all walks of life.

Of course, some, like the PM, didn’t see it that way. Heather du Plessis-Allan was infuriated: “The opposition to the TPP was ugly. Worse than that, it backfired. At first, the crowds of thousands walking Auckland’s streets in protest were impressive. Until you talked to them. Too many of them didn’t even know why they were protesting. But what TPP-haters have done is drive the thousands of ordinary Kiwis who don’t really understand the deal and its implications straight into the arms of the TPP fan-boys and girls. Whose argument are you more likely to believe: the guy who can relay the solitary blog post he’s read on how great the TPP is, or the guy lying in the middle of the road clutching a molotov cocktail because he’s angry about something vaguely to do with the price of medicine?”

What? Did anyone see a guy lying in the middle of the road clutching a molotov cocktail? I’ve read a lot of crap of late but this desperate cant took the cake. Journalists (and here I use the term in its widest sense) should take care to report what happened. Not what could have happened. Or, in the case of the guy lying in the middle of the road clutching a molotov cocktail, what didn’t happen at all. This was ugly, Heather. Inaccurate, inflammatory and just plain ugly. Perhaps you should go back to ordering firearms online and let those who oppose this corporate coup get on with practising their right to peaceful protest.

But before you do, ponder Heather the following and ask yourself whose argument are you more likely to believe: John Key or Nobel Laureate Economist Joseph Stiglitz. John Key or Senator Elizabeth Warren. John Key or Rod Oram. John Key or Rob O’Neill. For Stuff, he wrote ‘On the TPPA, words are cheap’ : “In signing last week, New Zealand formally abandoned its bottom-line on dairy access. As former trade minister and TPPA champion Tim Groser (now NZ Ambassador to Washington) warned in October, we swallowed some dead rats. We swallowed more than we expected. There are economic benefits to the agreement but they are tiny, even according to official modelling. Here’s a fact: the TPPA is a disappointment, an opportunity lost, a setback rather than a victory in New Zealand’s long fight for access to major dairy markets in the US and Japan. That should not be a controversial statement. It’s obvious and it’s true. We have little to celebrate.”

So, in spite of the hoo-ha, with TPP, we have nothing to celebrate. John Key wanted to negotiate it in secret and have it signed sight unseen. Failing to consult with Maori demonstrated a disrespect that will not be forgotten. By failing to be transparent about the treaty’s contents, by promoting only its margin of error benefits and flat-out denying its proven and profound downsides, by wearing a non-New Zealand flag at the ceremony, by running down his country on its national day, the lone voice, he revealed himself as a man who does not represent us at all.

This week, a fake pink penis pricked the Prime Minister’s bubble. Perhaps next time he will be more careful when trying to ram a cock and balls corporate coup down the throats of a fiercely independent and freedom loving nation.


  1. Simon as a centre right voter, this incident is gold. The people see a disgusting act of crudity on a Minister who not only keeps their cool but also their sense of humour. I particularly loved Winston Peters reaction! Big poll boost for National and NZF coming up.

    • Tee hee! you said “big poll!” snigger, snigger.
      I think you’ve just contradicted yourself – if this was so disgusting and crude, why is everyone except Key enjoying it so much? You are so determined to find your side the victor in this that you beg the question. No-one, apart from your glorious leader, appears to see any offence in this-which is why no charges were laid (tee hee!)
      You appear to suffer from the same grandiosity as Key, who stated, seemingly unironically, that, he would, had he spoken at Waitangi, have “straightened out” the views of those who challenge him. He, and you, appear to think anyone who disagrees is a(n oxy)moron and that they are, by definition, wrong, because not your brand of right.
      Yes, Joyce laughed it off. He and Key know, from experience, that one may smile and be a villain.

    • Tee hee! you said “big poll!” snigger, snigger.
      I think you’ve just contradicted yourself – if this was so disgusting and crude, why is everyone except Key enjoying it so much? You are so determined to find your side the victor in this that you beg the question. No-one, apart from your glorious leader, appears to see any offence in this-which is why no charges were laid (tee hee!)
      You appear to suffer from the same grandiosity as Key, who stated, seemingly unironically, that, he would, had he spoken at Waitangi, have “straightened out” the views of those who challenge him. He, and you, appear to think anyone who disagrees is a(n oxy)moron and that they are, by definition, wrong, because not your brand of right.
      Yes, Joyce laughed it off. He and Key know, from experience, that one may smile and be a villain.

      • Key wouldn’t go to Waitangi because he was prevented from responding to criticism about the TPP. Seems like our friends up north are learning about suppression of free speech from our friends on the left eh?

        • Our friends up north learned about suppression of free speech from “our friends” (/sarc) on the Right.

          Have you been out of the country for a while, OXYOOD ?

    • Ah … ? @ OXYWOOD ( How do trolls come up with those names? Do they have like a ‘Dumb names for Trolls’ generator? )
      So, you’re centre-right are you? Please describe what the view of our political landscape looks like to you, being in the centre an’ all. Does it look like it’s sort of in the middle to you? Do you drive a car? If you do? Then, until you get a better idea of what the centre looks like I’d suggest you refrain from getting behind the wheel until your pills kick in. Or out. Most of you Right types seem to be tits deep in anti depressants. Why is that I ponder??

      If you think stevie $42-million-dollars-of-tax-payers-money Joyce getting smacked by a rubber cock is disgusting then what might you find abhorrent? Nuns being told their washing’s no yet dry? jonky pissing in the shower as he dreams of tugging and fondling hair ? Yes folks ! Roll right up and see our Prime Minister. A wanking, pissing, tugging, bully with $55 million of your dollars sneering at you from a raft of logical fallacies and psychological mechanisms designed by his marketing team to fuck YOU on the deal. Roll right up ! Come and see the Mighty Jonky and his trained monkey Mr Stevie, the laughing, dancing, dodgy, cock slapped muppet.

      Stevie kept his cool because he has no feelings either way. Sociopaths learn that from an early age. If , for example, I’d been hit by a rubber cock and balls I’d a been deeply shamed and would have started crying, as I pocketed the thing for later. Later ….Mmmmmm…. ! Rubber….. Mmmmm ! Cock …… Mmmmmmm! Balls ….. ! Yes, balls! I say balls to you Sir! And if a cock must come attached, then so be it. I’ll use it for something ? I know, to poke holes to grow me lettuces.

      And if you think Stevie laughing off a brave show of outright rage at how the worthless fuck’s doing his bit to tank the economy as he helps sell us to yank owned corporations is a sense of humour to you then you must clearly be being paid to tug your willy here because any other reason defies common sense.
      What are your centre- right feelings on this ?

      Sadly, you may be centre- right about the polls. The shits and giggles hoi polloi out there who think food porn followed by renovation porn is , like BOOM ! Then yes. Jonky will be a polls hit.
      A generic conversation down the pisser between kiwi-as mates downing RTD’s , smelling of root juice , i.e. Lynx while planning on spending their minimum wage on some chuck ( read chick ) to get her pissed then maybe a root?
      “ Yeah, I like jonky ‘cause he’s a Boss y’know? He knows how to run th’ country an’ that. Yeah, aye? He fuckin’ does cool shit. He’s a cool dude man. Fuck off man, he’s way cool. Yeah, nah man.
      Ah yes. From your centre – right perspective ? You may well know more than we think. ( Knowing more than one thinks ? Isn’t that the bane of most politicians ? Educated beyond their intelligence ? )

      • The view from the centre right is very good. People are cueing up to live in NZ, inflation and interest rates are low, there’s plenty of work and we’re one of the happiest nations on the planet. Not bad.

        • ” The view from the centre-right is very good ” Are you an idiot? That’s a serious question. Do you know the answer to … it ? ( What, about @ Oxywood that sounds vaguely fifties ! ? )
          What people are cueing up ? Ok, ok. Yes, you are correct there . I bet there are many cueing up to come here. I understand your use of a logical fallacy to support your argument. It’s like saying ‘ breathing is good for your health’ . Inflation and interest rates are low because the Neo Right Kiwi-As regime are banking on a dopy farmer future , and we all know we must eat of die. Shitting, pissing and scratching are a close second and none of those are possible/likely without the former ( The Great NZ Institutionalised lie ladies and gentlemen) as for happy ? Are you fucking kidding me ? Have you seen the suicide stats ? What of the 300 + k kids on , or below, internationally recognised poverty levels? Are they laughing it up? Given how absolutely wonderful our country is according to you? Do you think there’s a future of gay happiness in there for them ? “Not bad” ! What do you think ‘ Pretty good ‘ might be I wonder? Sugar coated fairies dusting us with Ecstasy powder while we sleep ? ( I wish ) We have a crisis in Paradise man. Do you ever wonder why that is ? The morphine-like bullshit you try to espouse here is going to wither under closer investigation thank God . So, back to your sheet-trapped bottom-gasses with you my man. Espouse what you like, the truth will-out.

          • Maybe you have to play pool against a gummint-appointed shark in order to gain residency. “Aw, bad luck-snookered you there!”

        • Oxyood, you are not “centre-right”. Everything you’ve posted here indicates you are more comfortable as a committed right-wing ACT supporter.

          There is nothing “centrist” about your views.

          • Totally agree, this oxybad — I mean oxygood troll is as out of touch as his beloved jonky donky. I listened to his pathetic speech yesterday and his poor performance in parliament. This rude, smiling elitiest PM is a joke and he thinks we all buy it. He actually believes the world buys his BS.
            He paints a rosy picture of NZ and denies the truths about what is really going on. No wonder we are the laughing stock right now with the dildo incident. The Natz just do not get it that their allegiance to the criminal banks and greedy corporations and deep sea oil drillers are the main issues here and that they are so out of touch with the people. I am also so ashamed of Helen Clark and Phil Goff and David Shearer for their support of TPPA. The good news is that it appears that Andrew Little is getting his mojo and is speaking out powerfully and compassionately. He is growing into a pretty good leader after all.
            Please voters, do not believe all that you hear coming from the lying, out of touch, Natz folks.

        • are you ignoring the fact that some one actually tried to BURN DOWN a national MPS office just the other day ?

          cos thats clearly the sign of a happy population isnt it

    • Sorry troll, this time you are out of touch. Everyone I have spoke to laughed hard. The moment hit the funny bone as the toilet seat flung at the Aussie cricketer did.

    • The dildoing was THE best statement of fact I have ever seen by a protester, Genius. Rape our sovereignty all right with your stitched up TPPA.

      And the arrogance of Key to think he could parade around Eden Park like some kind of Jesus Christ walking amongst his people, that is until the booing and jeering began. Didn’t the out of touch wide boy get a fright then. Even the league great Jonathan Thurston took the piss out of him, as he tried to leach off their aura.

      What these moments did was expose these Emperors with no clothes for what they are, naked, vain and beyond their deceit, stupid. They are not loved or popular as they think they are, oh no, they are just as loathed and hated.

    • So Key gives the middle finger to Kiwi democracy by signing a corporate takeover of New Zealand at Skycity, Corporate HQ.

      Gollum Key manufactures a reason to not attend Waitangi because he had not consulted about his “precious” TPPA with tangata whenua.

      FJK attends the Auckland Nines hoping for a chance to get into the changing sheds with the Warriors if they won, but gets booed by the crowds there instead.

      Then mana from heaven, Stephen Joyce is callously attacked with a dildo. “Statesman” (deliberate irony alert) Key goes to the media bunker and attacks the protest action.

      I’d say Stephen Joyce would much rather have been hit by a low-flying dildo, than be the most hated PM ever in New Zealand.

      When John’s Key’s vanity flag project and renaming of New Zealand as New Keyland are defeated, it will be his last act as PM. Time for this American citizen, to retire with his bodyguards to Hawaii.

      Bye bye Gollum.

    • One of the main focal points for exploring loneliness is through the experience of Crooks. A main character in the novel he is a victim of blatant prejudice and racism. Even Crook’s entrance into the novel is as disembodied person. He is introduced by other characters in an abusive and insulting manner leading to a sense that he is segregated (which he is) from the other ranch hands, and is both anonymous and marginalised. This isolation from others is a precursor presented by Steinbeck to explore Crook’s loneliness in later chapters but particularly in chapter 4. It must be remembered that American society at this time was deeply divided along racial lines and Crook’s position on the farm emphasises this. He lives a solitary existence having his dwellings within the stable rooms. Of course, the analogy that Steinbeck is trying to draw here is that Crooks is being more closely related with animals than with actual persons. As Crooks himself explains about his isolated position in chapter 4 when addressing the issue of Lonnie’s entrance, “I ain’t wanted in the bunk house and you ain’t wanted in my room.” Here, we can see that Crooks has imposed a kind of isolation in order to draw a protective shield around himself. He is described as an educated man who reads a lot of books and it could be argued that his higher level of thinking makes him more acutely aware of his predicament thus further exacerbating his loneliness. As evidence of this, Crooks is described as ‘whining’ when further on chapter 4 he tells Lennie that, “Books ain’t no good. Aguy needs somebody to be near him. A guy goes nuts if he ain’t got nobody… I tell ya a guy gets too lonely an’ he gets sick.” This is clearly a significant insight presented by Steinbeck into Crooks’ inner world; a world where prejudice, separation and pride as a defence mechanism all combine to enhance a man’s loneliness.
      Other characters who come under the author’s scrutiny for the theme of loneliness are Curley and his wife, but especially his wife. Certainly, it is significant that Curley’s wife doesn’t even have a name. Names are vitally important to a person’s sense of uniqueness. It forms an integral part of their identify. For anyone not having a real name becomes more anonymous and this is surely synonymous with loneliness. Curley’s wife is not a real person; she is objectified as Curley’s property hence more of an object. This objectification is demeaning and dehumanises a person. One obvious outcome of this is loneliness. Significantly too, Curley and his wife never actually meet! Despite the characters ‘charging’ around the novel asking, or demanding in Curley’s case, where each other is, they never experience any meeting thus a clear lack of intimacy. It is as if Steinbeck wants to create an actual physical gulf between the two to highlight their loneliness to the reader. Curley’s wife complains on numerous occasions to support this point and in one important moment in chapter 5 when her frustration boils over to reveal her true feelings she declares,”..Sat’iday night. Ever’body out doin’ som’pin’. Ever’body! An’ what am I doin’? Standin’ here talking to a bunch of bindle stiffs- a nigger an’ a dum-dum and a lousy ol’ sheep – an’ likin’ it because they aint nobody else.”
      Curley as well is clearly a lonely man. He may hide his true feelings behind his status as the boss’s son and by his macho posturing with the other ranch hands but Steinbeck portrays him as essentially isolated, angry, insecure and lonely. One of Curley’s main character roles is to play the jealous man constantly worrying about his new wife and where she is. He spends a great deal of time in the book appearing, disappearing only to reappear again suddenly demanding to know where is wife is. It is almost comical, but most certainly what Steinbeck is trying to express is the tragic and lonely nature of the relationship, or lack of it, that Curley has with his wife. In Chapter 4 this insecurity is reaching a peak and Steinbeck develops the tension leading up to the fight with Lennie when Curley rushes into the bunk house and demands, “Any of you guys seen my wife? ….. Curley looked threateningly around the room. “Here’s the hell’s Slim?” In response to George’s direction, Curley, “jumped out the door and banged it after him.” Curley’s behaviour is typical of a lonely and insecure man. In fact, the only time that they are physically present is each other’s company is when she is dead!
      It could be argued that Steinbeck is using the theme of broken dreams and its devastating effects on the individual in order to explore loneliness. Most of the main characters have some form of unrealised dream and this trend to impact of their emotional well-being. Curley’s wife has her thwarted dream of life in ‘pitchers’. George and Lennie have their American Dream of owning their own land as Lennie is often says, ‘livin’ off the fat a the lan.’ Candy too has a dream but initial excitement of joining up with George and Lennie is soon shattered. By the end of Chapter 5 Candy cuts a lonely and dejected figure as he realises that the death of Curley’s wife is also symbolic of the death of his own dream. His despondency at the terrible consequences of her death is apparent when he somewhat exasperatedly pleads with George in the chapter saying, “Now Candy spoke his greatest fear. You an’ me can get that little place, can’t we George? You an’ me can go there an’ live nice, can’t we, George? Can’t we?” Candy’s repetitive tone is desperate and indicative of a man who is clinging to a dream that he already knows deep down is long dead.
      Finally, the natural landscape itself and the relatively isolated position of the farm highlight the loneliness of the geography. It should be remembered that the place the novel is set in, Soledad, actually means loneliness in Spanish. At the beginning of the book in Chapter 1 we are given information about the farm’s remote location when George and Lennie are dropped off by the bus and have to walk 10 miles to it, much to George’s chagrin. Steinbeck also describes the landscape in an inhospitable way. Despite the idyllic opening, when the surroundings are presented almost ‘Garden of Eden’ like, this natural beauty soon turns darker and more ominous. The novel is also set at the time of economic depression and this was compounded by the climate conditions of the period where several exceptionally severe droughts resulted in a parched, barren landscape. This barrenness, lack of lushness and verdant oasis are synonymous with the lifelessness of loneliness. Large areas of land were badly affected by the lack of rain and effectively became ‘dustbowls’. By the end nature is brutal, cold, predatory and devoid of feelings. All these descriptions can be equally applied to the feeling of loneliness.
      Loneliness is a major, key theme in ‘Of Mice and Men’. Many of the characters, in fact maybe all, suffer in a real sense from it. Even the natural surroundings lend themselves to it. Even the natural surroundings lend themselves to it. In the closing sequence Steinbeck has brought the novel full circle. From a vividly painted, colourful nature scene, nature has now been presented as inherently a dark, depressing and lonely place. this weak and powerless do not survive in his harsh, lonely environment. It is ‘dog eat dog’, every man for himself. This is the ultimate expression of aloneness and loneliness.

  2. Simon – a graphic expose’ of just who Key is , where his real loyalty’s lie, who he really is operating for, and the smutty double standards he is prepared to apply to any who would oppose his anti democratic agendas.

    Well done. Hit all the main points that so many Kiwis now find so offensive about the man.

    The only thing you forgot to mention was the scene at the Nines whereby he was roundly booed from the stands and skulked , head down , into the labyrinth of the stadiums backrooms.

    There he tried to conduct some sort of sanctimonious ‘statesman ‘ speech and lecture us all about morality and what is and isn’t a good look for this country.

    What a totally gutless sold out weasel the man truly is.

  3. John Key was appalled about a plastic penis. Heather du Plessis-Allan was infuriated at a protest.

    When John Key acts as he does playing fast and loose with our traditional understanding of democracy, and condoning corruption in government (see Hekia Parata), and a prominent journalist is notably incensed about sideline behaviour to corrupt political behaviour, I am both appalled and infuriated.

    When what causes the problems is ignored, when power being wielded as it is becomes acceptable and excused, to use the penis analogy, the country is fucked.

  4. I’m glad the crowd booed Key at the nines – the places he can hide are becoming few and far between. His escapes (mainly to Hawaii) to avoid questions are very convient. The MSM happily goes along with the abuse, and crudeness Key dishes out.
    They all should hang their heads in shame.

  5. Are these Grosers own words?
    “As former trade minister and TPPA champion Tim Groser (now NZ Ambassador to Washington) warned in October, we swallowed some dead rats. We swallowed more than we expected. There are economic benefits to the agreement but they are tiny, even according to official modelling. Here’s a fact: the TPPA is a disappointment, an opportunity lost, a setback rather than a victory in New Zealand’s long fight for access to major dairy markets in the US and Japan. That should not be a controversial statement. It’s obvious and it’s true. We have little to celebrate.”

  6. Something I don’t understand on the Heather du Plessis-Allan piece; why open the article for comments then not show them even days after publishing? The Herald decides whether the opinions will be seen or not and so unduly influences the discourse. No doubt they will be released eventually, but by this time the story has moved out of the limelight.

    “The smart way to keep people passive and obedient is to strictly limit the spectrum of acceptable opinion, but allow very lively debate within that spectrum….” — Noam Chomsky

  7. John Key verses Dildo,

    1st category;
    Does the job it’s supposed to do. Key losses Dildo wins.

    2nd Category;
    Capable of satisfaction.
    Key losses dildo wins.

    3rd category;
    Can be amusing
    Key losses Dildo wins.

    4th category.
    Key and Dildo both equally win.

    5th Category.
    Is a real cock.
    Key wins, Dildo losses.

  8. Thank you Simon, excellent! The troll Oxywood and others like him/her should be given no oxygen, dont take the bait!

    Key wearing the as-yet-unchosen alternative NZ flag at the TPPA signing in that hyperdemic needle skycity that sucks money from gambling addicts and ruins lives, while in the streets a celebration of the diversity of NZ cultures walking side by side, plenty of existing NZ flags, kind of sums up the fact that his loyalites lie elsewhere.

    I feel he is a kind of sociopath with no moral compass. While NZers were in the 1980s fighting for a better world against nuclear power, against racism, for equality, he was the young whizzkid money trader. The nurse who flung the dildo as a symbol of TPPA raping our sovereignity will go down in history as one of our folk heroes.

    Also I am sick of “rnz” rebranded radio NZ calling the TPPA a “trade deal” – it is no ordinary trade deal like Hone Tuwhare’s “No Ordinary Sun”. Like a nuclear bomb is no ordinary bomb, the TPPA exposes NZ to legal attack by global corpoarates. That is why the symbol of the rubber dildo being flung at the “minister of everything” is an apt metaphor!
    As for Key being the only one with no sense of humour about it, I remember Milan Kundera, in The Book of Laughter and Forgetting, said you could recognise the Stalinists by their lack of humour.
    Keep up the insightful social commentary Simon!

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