TDB NZ Blogger Alignment Awards 2014



“The blogs dont get to vote in the labour party, so we dont pay much consideration to it”
– Andrew Little, 2012

“Blogs,who cares about blogs” – Clayton Cosgrove, 2012

“I don’t read blogs” they are “nonsense” – David Shearer, 2012


Sigh. Those quotes from 2012 are gloriously outdated aren’t they? Labour are to cutting edge social media what drinking is to driving. In the wake of Dirty Politics and the revelations of how closely  the majority of mainstream media outlets colluded with Cameron Slater, bloggers have become more powerful than your average back bench MP, but then again a warm glass of urine is arguably more powerful than your average back bench MP.

2014 limps to an end with the political Left crushed and the Right in full spectrum dominance. From Guyon Espiner on Radio NZ, to Mike Hosking on Seven Sharp, to Paul Henry on TV3, to Sean Plunkett on Radio Live, to Judith Collins in the Sunday Star Times, it’s wall to wall neoliberal lunatic and on the blogosphere it was no better. Farrar was thanked by Key in his victory speech and Slater has leverage over the PM after running black ops for him. With the millions being poured into his new hate speech site ‘Freed’, 2015 will be as dirty and vicious as 2014.

How delightful.

TDB Recommends

Before we try and drag ourselves through the future sewers Mr Slater and his fascists have in store for the nation, let’s reflect on those in the blogosphere who made it the year it was. Without further ado, here are this years TDB Blogger Alignment Awards 2014*, with much referencing to Wiki for the Dungeons & Dragons alignment descriptions.


Lawful Good Blogger 2014: Sarah Wilson – Writehandedgirl 
Lawful Good is known as the “Saintly” or “Crusader” alignment. A Lawful Good blogger typically acts with compassion, and always with honor and a sense of duty.

Sarah blogs with a rare courage. The anger her treatment at the hands of WINZ was best articulated by Chris Trotter who wrote

I’m angry. Not angry like I get when I spill my coffee, but angry in that deep place way down in my gut that’s somehow connected to the back of my throat and my tear ducts. Angry as in slowly shaking my head. Angry as in quietly muttering “un-fucking-believable!” That sort of angry.

…Sarah has an ability to explore how those with little power or voice are really treated after Politicians regurgitate their rhetoric. Her strength in the face of such treatment by those supposedly charged with her welfare is a tragic and powerful call to arms. She is a hero.

PS – It’s a shame that the ‘plucky new leftwing blog’ she is involved in has already lost one of their editors, but not surprising. Looking at who is on there, it’s amazing they haven’t all language policed each other to death.


Neutral Good Blogger 2014: Gordon Campbell – Scoop
Neutral Good is known as the “Benefactor” alignment. A Neutral Good blogger is guided by his/her conscience and typically acts altruistically, without regard for or against Lawful precepts such as rules or tradition. A Neutral Good blogger has no problems with co-operating with lawful officials, but does not feel beholden to them.

Gordon remains the only reason to read Scoop. He is easily one of the best bloggers in NZ with a means of cutting through bullshit with a laser like precision. His work continues to be the benchmark for progressive bloggers and his work this year has been some of his best work to date. A must read every week, he is on the side of the angels.


Chaotic Good Blogger 2014: Idiot-Savant – No Right Turn
Chaotic Good is known as the “Beatific,” “Rebel,” or “Cynic” alignment. A Chaotic Good blogger favors change for a greater good, disdains bureaucratic organizations that get in the way of social improvement, and places a high value on personal freedom, not only for oneself, but for others as well.

Idiot-Savant is a force of nature who fights his own battles to his own tune. Uses OIA requests better than any other blogger in the blogosphere, IS consistently breaks news angles and keeps a fierce eye on all things progressive. His harsh critique of Labour’s rolling over on warrantless spying is one of the best written.


Lawful Neutral Blogger 2014: Bryce Edwards – Liberation 
Lawful Neutral is called the “Judge” or “Disciplined” alignment. A Lawful Neutral blogger typically believes strongly in Lawful concepts such as honor, order, rules and tradition, and often follows a personal code.

The Godfather of the Blogs, Bryce Edwards continues to be a must read and is one of the only things worth reading in the NZ Herald. Edwards has done more to bring in voices from outside the beltway than any other columnist. His view on issues are the best read in the country. The only other person close to being as respected voice of reason is Russell Brown.


Neutral Blogger 2014: Graeme Edgeler – Public Address
Neutral alignment, also referred to as True Neutral or Neutral Neutral, is called the “Undecided” or “Nature’s” alignment. This blogger represents Neutral on both axes, and tends not to feel strongly towards any alignment. A farmer whose primary overriding concern is to feed his family is of this alignment. Most animals, lacking the capacity for moral judgment, are of this alignment since they are guided by instinct rather than conscious decision. Many roguish characters who play all sides to suit themselves are also of this alignment (such as a weapon merchant with no qualms selling his wares to both sides of a war for a profit). Some Neutral bloggers, rather than feeling undecided, are committed to a balance between the alignments. They may see good, evil, law and chaos as simply prejudices and dangerous extremes.

Despite being a lawyer, Edgler has managed to gain vast levels of respect from across the political spectrum. His say on most legal issues is considered the final word and he beats Andrew Geddis as the ‘go to’ person because no one ever goes to Pundit blog.


Chaotic Neutral Blogger 2014 – Matthew Hooton
Chaotic Neutral is called the “Anarchist” or “Free Spirit” alignment. A blogger of this alignment is an individualist who follows his or her own heart, and generally shirks rules and traditions. Although they promote the ideals of freedom, it is their own freedom that comes first. Good and Evil come second to their need to be free, and the only reliable thing about them is how totally unreliable they are. Chaotic Neutral bloggers are free-spirited and do not enjoy the unnecessary suffering of others, but if they join a team, it is because that team’s goals happen to coincide with their own at the moment. They invariably resent taking orders and can be very selfish in their pursuit of personal goals.

Somehow the moral shepard of the right, Matthew Hooton, has managed to retain all his media commentator platforms, despite being caught red handed in Dirty Politics giving Hager’s address to Slater to publish on his blog in the hope that the Chinese organised crime lords Cathy Odgers was working for would assassinate Hager. His continued presence as a political commentator is proof that NZers are laid back about everything, even our fascism. Sure Hooton handed over Hager’s address in the hope he’d get assassinated, but why get all worked up over that? Let’s have a beer and wank on about rugby.  While not a blogger himself, Hooton’s trolling of The Standard is legendary. Hooton is charming and his ongoing role as a commentator reminds us all how little charm there is in NZ.


Lawful Evil Blogger 2014: Lynn Prentice – The Standard
Lawful Evil is referred to as the “Dominator” or “Diabolic” alignment. Bloggers of this alignment see a well-ordered system as being easier to exploit, and show a combination of desirable and undesirable traits; while they usually obey their superiors and keep their word, they care nothing for the rights and freedoms of other individuals and are not averse to twisting the rules to work in their favor. Examples of this alignment include tyrants, devils, undiscriminating mercenary types who have a strict code of conduct, and loyal soldiers who enjoy the act of killing.

Of all the bizarre self mutilations this year, Lynn’s decision to publish a blog by Josie Pagani outing one of his best bloggers, Greg Presland, was the most appalling. For someone who likes to bleat like a wounded lamb about the sanctity of pseudonyms, watching him throw Presland under a bus for the machinations of the Labour Party was eye watering. Talking to Presland about it afterwards, Greg said he was shocked Lynn hadn’t even given him the courtesy of knowing that Pagani was going to officially out him. Like the good soldier he is, Presland bit his lip, but for an old duck like Lynn who likes to quack on about The Standard’s independence and the importance of pseudonyms, his own disloyalty to his own bloggers leaves him with little ammunition to throw at others.  Lynn brays like a donkey about how fragile my ego supposedly is, I think I’d prefer to have a thin skin than be a mean old shithead.


Neutral Evil Blogger 2014: David Farrar – Kiwiblog
Neutral Evil is called the “Malefactor” alignment. Bloggers of this alignment are typically selfish and have no qualms about turning on their allies-of-the-moment, and usually make allies primarily to further their own goals. They have no compunctions about harming others to get what they want, but neither will they go out of their way to cause carnage or mayhem when they see no direct benefit to it. They abide by laws for only as long as it is convenient for them. A blogger of this alignment can be more dangerous than either Lawful or Chaotic Evil characters, since she or he is neither bound by any sort of honor or tradition nor disorganized and pointlessly violent.

The bore of Babylon, the cloven hoofed one, shed crocodile tears this year about how he contemplated leaving blogging because he was supposedly ‘violated’ by information turning up in Dirty Politics, Farrar claimed he had been broken into and hacked, the truth was that a former staff member gave Hager the information. Now when former staff of Kim Dotcom went public, Farrar couldn’t laugh hard enough, but when former staff do the same to him Farrar was suddenly crying rivers of tears.

Farrar’s help in providing Key with polling data insights was so vital to National’s win that Key thanked Farrar personally in his victory speech. Farrar pretends to be lite right and moderate, the reality is he is a climate denying Israeli aggressor apologist Government propagandist who has been allowed to become a media commentator. He ends the year more powerful and more connected to Key than ever before.


Chaotic Evil Blogger 2014: Cameron Slater – Whaleoil
The Chaotic Evil Blogger is referred to as the “Destroyer” or “Demonic” alignment. Bloggers of this alignment tend to have no respect for rules, other people’s lives, or anything but their own desires, which are typically selfish and cruel. They set a high value on personal freedom, but do not have any regard for the lives or freedom of other people. They do not work well in groups, as they resent being given orders, and usually behave themselves only out of fear of punishment. It is not compulsory for a Chaotic Evil blogger to be constantly writing sadistic blogs just for the sake of being evil, or constantly disobeying orders just for the sake of causing chaos. They do however enjoy the suffering of others, and view honor and self-discipline as weaknesses. Serial killers and monsters of limited intelligence are typically Chaotic Evil.

For a third year running, Slater is the most chaotic evil blogger in NZ. Let’s list his crimes against media…

  • Remember when Slater published falsified SIS info to smear the leader of the opposition months before an election in a dirty smear campaign that originated out of the PMs Office?
  • Remember when in Dirty Politics Slater is alleged to have blackmailed Rodney Hide into standing down?
  • Remember when in Dirty Politics Slater is alleged to have trawled brothals for dirt?
  • Remember when in Dirty Politics Slater hacked into and downloaded the Labour Party website?
  • Remember when in Dirty Politics Slater crucified public servants?
  • Remember when in Dirty Politics Slater was trying to attack the head of the SFO?
  • Remember when Slater called a person who died in a car accident ‘feral’.
  • Remember when Slater described a Kings student who drank himself to death as “a toffee-nosed school boy, a dead thief and a liar who couldn’t handle his piss. I always said King’s boys were poofs.”
  • Remember when Slater published all the details of businessman Matt Blomfield whose stolen computer he somehow obtained and how Blomfield was then shot at his home?
  • Remember when Slater tried to insinuate that Tania Billingsly tried to get sexually assaulted on purpose to claim rape culture?
  • Remember when he was convicted of breaching a variety of name suppression orders?
  • Remember when Slater published the personal employment details of a wharf protestor?
  • Remember when Slater posted a fake Green Party press release that inspired threats of violence against Russel Norman?
  • Remember when Slater publicized a doctored interview with Jim Anderton edited into Anderton saying an earthquake would need to strike for him to lose the Christchurch mayoralty?
  • Remember when Slater was wanting looters in Christchurch to be shot in the stomach so that the death would be slow and painful?
  • Remember when he claimed Chris Carter’s mother who was dead for 12 years was still using a taxpayer cell phone?

…in my opinion, Slater is a full blown fascist and his relationship with Key is all the more sicker for that. No PM of NZ should have an active relationship with a fascist, especially one who claims to have recorded the PM and has leverage over them.  Currently Slater is trying to shop around claims that left wing bloggers conspired to goad him into a suicide and were involved in hiring and paying Rawshark to hack him. His new hate speech news site ‘Freed’ is launching next year and promises to lower the standards of ‘news’ even further.

How someone this malicious can continue winning awards is beyond me. Sadism should be shown contempt, it shouldn’t be celebrated.


*TDB Bloggers weren’t eligible otherwise we would have just given all the good awards to ourselves.


  1. Quite clever to link blogger awards to the alignment system of Advanced Dungeons and Dragons RPG and to class the Blubberman as Chaotic Evil. Are you or were you a fan of the game, Martyn?

  2. Without doing all the chaos/evil/good stuff, I would like to nominate Frank Macskasy as best overall blogger. His work is well-written, perfectly referenced, and always on the money.

  3. This is for you simon bridges . Since you seem unsure of where stuff is . You fucker . I’ve helicoptered through Fiordland may times . I can show you special places mate . Come and have a look ? Come and fly with me ?

    Funeral .

    I drove from Christchurch to Queenstown .
    I drove through the most beautiful countryside you could wish to see . From the Canterbury Plains , the size of Holland . Flat and vast with that wonderful , broad sky . Nor West clouds were building from behind a mantle of mountains the colours of mauve and grey . Then through Geraldine with its stunning , green rolling hills and dales , forested valleys and Hawthorn hedges running along the road sides .
    Fairlie was nestled amongst wandering fields of grain and seed plants that looked like golden oceans frozen in time .
    West ward and out over Burkes Pass . The dividing point between the lower mid Canterbury Plains and the breath taking beauty of The Mackenzie Country . An immense area of thrilling tussock , bedevilled by a warm , whipping wind that gave the late evening light its magic . The magic hour .
    I drove past Lakes Tekapo and Pukaki and by their beauty , I was rendered unable to drive . So I pulled over and headed up a low hillock for a better view . The Lakes were a vivid , turquoise blue . It was an outstanding colour against the lowering Western skies and the bruises and the slate grey’s of the snow capped mountains . Then , as clouds passed over , they left jet black patches in the golds and oranges of the hills and plains that moved slowly over the horizons like the shadow of a sting ray on a tropical ocean bed .
    I drove on through the Lindis pass and saw hoards of swooning tourists taking photographs from its crest on that little saddle where there is now an idiot light blinking about a sharp corner to comfort any moron unable to turn a steering wheel . That ugly little solar powered digital creature should be plundered for its panel and put on a hippy bus to charge up the ‘ vaporisers ‘ to further enhance the almost indescribable beauty it was detracting from . Like an angry pimple on the nose of a beautiful person .
    Down I went into Otago . Central Otago . A land renown for its raw beauty and even more raw energy . It’s a special and magical part of our wonderful lands and there’s more to it’s yields of fruits , flowers , wines and meats than their basic , mechanical contents of sugars , proteins , carbohydrates and fats . There , in those heather tufted shist cragged hills there is an energy . A vital , ancient energy that elevates those lands to beyond spectacular . That old Blue Clutha River . Winding her way , as patiently as a snake , through those wild hills under a sky , more dramatic than Ben Hur on Acid .
    She goes off and falls into the coldest , cleanest oceans imaginable . The Southern Pacific where fresh , and salty waters mingle and breath to create life .
    I sped through Tarris and followed the filament of water that would become Lake Dunston . It saddens me when I see that beautiful body of water because I know what was sacrificed for its existence . Down below , in those deep , cold waters is a beautiful valley of orchards and old stone houses . Dramatic cliffs with a thread of a road that gave the area a romantic and vaguely Italian feel . There’s that old swing bridge and big stone buildings that were once the lower part of Cromwell , drowned and decaying and out of sight . Now , a few dreary , plastic tomb stone homes packaging their inhabitants for their fearful deaths crowns that little town ship with it’s cafes and petrol stations and ugly , modern , slab sided concrete churches to Lord God The Dollar , hallowed by thy name . There’s even a Mitre 10 Mega store with its vulgar orange stripe pushing its way into ones subconscious whether you like it or not . And in such a beautiful part of the world ? WTF ?

    Queenstown was flat out . It was one traffic jam in all directions . A delightful bedlam bellowed out of the little town in rude good health . A young persons town . Beautiful and full of Life !
    Then on to the funeral . The funeral was held in Paradise . Been to Paradise ? Just go past Glenorchy . There it is . Look about . What do you see ? What do you feel ? Walk away from your car and still yourself . Just stand , or sit . What do you feel ? What do you see ? Towering mountains ? Crystal clear creeks running from beach forests ? The sounds of Bell Birds ? Yes , all that is there . But what about that other element ? That , which is invisible to the naked eye ? What is that feeling ?

    When I read your Post @ Martyn Bradbury , I felt an anger that was frankly quite scary . Even for an old bruiser like me . It was a dangerous , dark anger of abandonment to rage that no good could come of . At least not within the polite society that is ours . A society that has been dragged down to the gutter to protect the Swine who created the safety net for themselves that is the logical fallacy .

    To think that such evil , awful , shallow , soulless creatures are at the helm of our wonderful country ( On all levels what’s more ! ) leaves me with a terrible set of ideas and black agendas that should probably alert the authorities . At this point , I’d like to invite those same ‘authorities’ to come over to the Light . You’re being just as exploited and abused as the rest of us . Unless , of course , you enjoy hurting people while being paid for that . Like USA cops of late .

    This extraordinary country is ours . Not theirs . Anyone who wishes to sell us out to be exploited by others with a greater financial advantage are traitors and should be dealt with accordingly . For example : Selling our farm lands to rich Chinese is a crime . Not a business deal . It’s that simple . It’s not arguable .

    Allowing this New Generation of Swine to roll about in their own excrement in vile , boring , ugly cities as they wield control over us all is an abomination . The day will come when we all look back and hang our heads in shame , that we didn’t act sooner because the further we go down the rabbit hole , the further we have to come back .
    2015 is the year that we must act . Our time has come . Their time is due . And they must be made to atone and reimburse us as one would expect of any common criminal .

    Perhaps someone should publish cameron slater’s , mathew hooten’s , david farrar’s others addresses ? We could all call by for a cup of tea and a picklet of a Sunday afternoon ? We could sit outside on the street and have a picnic . A Human Picnic .

    • True, every last word Country boy and so eloquently written.
      I have done that drive from Christchurch to Queenstown and onto Glen orch many times and never ever tire of its ever changing beauty.
      However the dairy industry is now starting to green up the fringes of the Mckenzie Basin. It’s the thin end of the wedge and it really, really pisses me off.
      I mentioned it to a dairy farmer when I first saw it and his response was , his land, nobody owns water, he can do what he likes.
      And that sums up exactly where we are at( and have been for sometime now) heading into 2015.
      Short sited morons backed by short sited morons are running and ruining this country at a pace that defies belief .
      With your average Kiwi now more interested in their latest I phone than the preservation of the natural beauty that surrounds them, it’s going to be an up hill battle to keep the status quo. It’s galling for those who are aware that’s for sure.
      As Bob Dylan once sang , we’d better start swimming or we will sink like a stone, for the the times they are a changing….

  4. I guess some of the above is partly a bit tongue in cheek. Yes, The Standard has “changed” significantly since the disastrous election campaign, it even noticeably changed before, and some “back room control freak” seemed to be behind it. Gone are the times of truly free, open, easy debate, it seems all so more “conformist” and “mindful” of what the leadership of Labour may condone or not.

    As for the rest, I think that it is best to leave Lynn and the others run The Standard and otherwise here focus on a perhaps more independent and liberal way of blogging and commenting.

    It all requires a bit of give and take, and live and let live.

    The most unpalatable side of blogging certainly is on that Whaleoil “Dump” by Slater. I feel saddened that too many New Zealanders still give that guy their time and attention, last not least some in the MSM.

    It is a dark, dirty blemish on the blogosphere landscape in this country, what went on there, and still goes on there.

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