Why gifting Colin Craig Rodney or East Coast Bays is so risky and did everyone else feel dirty looking at that weird come hither flirty eyes thing he’s doing in that field?



“Let me baptise you”


Is this sexy Colin Craig is it? I haven’t laughed and cried so much in my life.

Unhinged never looked so likely.

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The real problem about Colin Craig is perfectly summed up in this odd slightly psychotic photo. The suspicion that beneath the weird facade is an even weirder facade is difficult to shake. Before we even bother to look at the political freak show cavalcade he brings in on his coat tails, how electable is Colin Craig really?

How much of this is smoke and mirror PR management to boost Colin’s profile in the vain hope that National have a viable plan B if the election gets as tight as it is looking to be? How naked is this pasty Emperor because if you stare hard at Rodney and East Coast Bays, it’s going to take a miracle.

Vernon Small and Josh Fagan have done a very thorough job of testing how strong Colin really is and it looks a hell of a lot like hype.

Let’s look how weak Colin’s hand really is.

Murray McCully: Will be thrown out of East Coast Bays with a crow bar. McCully knows the power of an electorate seat in an affluent north shore suburb, and knows if he hands it over everyone within National that he has kneecapped during his reign of terror will re-emerge and drag him down to hell. Handing East Coast Bays over to Colin might be good for the National Party, but terrible for the dark Prince, and if there’s one thing Muzza has always been spectacularly good at doing for many many decades now is look after Murray.

Mark Mitchell: National structure their electorate seats with this odd and needless thing called a spine. The LEC (Labour Electorate Committee’s) respond to the Mother Ship with all the leniency of Borg on assimilation day. The National Party electorate committees however operate with far more independence. Convincing Muzza to step aside for the good of the Party as one of the Party elders is one thing, trying to move a good ole boy confederate like Mark Mitchell to go willingly would require a small army to succeed.

East Coast Bays: Let’s do the math. Muzza got  21,094 votes last election, the drip they threw in for the Conservative Party got a mere 1614. Even if Muzza removes himself from the race, there is no guarantee that National voters would vote for Colin Craig in enough numbers to defeat the Labour candidate.

Rodney:  Better math for Colin. Mark got 20,253 votes last election where as Colin gained 12,222 votes. You see immediately how much more likely Rodney is as the electorate that has to go Colin Craig, problem is Mark will fight to stay in the race.

Wider National Party vote: Here’s the real dilemma. There is a large chunk of soft blue vote that would balk at the idea of Colin Craig as Minister for Science and Women’s Affairs and will walk over any closer relationship with Colin Craig, the added problem to that is the moment it does look like Colin has a secure entry line into Parliament, that could open the floodgates for all those angry white rural voters who feel Key is too Labour-lite to angrily go storming over to  Colin. So National could lose its soft blue vote and its angry blue vote in the same move.


The case against Colin Craig is pretty damning but the fact he is needing to be contemplated shows just how weak National really are.


    • If so, then a well-placed staple would be greatly appreciated. Please don’t Photoshop-enlarge the staple. It will not be necessary.

  1. OMG when I saw that picture I thought you had worked it up in Photoshop or something. I thought there’s no way someone would release a picture like that willingly, plus it’s got that kind of ‘off’ quality to it that poorly photoshopped pictures have.

    • Me too, but since then I have come to understand it is the real thing. Congrats to the photographer, you have brought out Colin’s “mysterious” side so well

    • If you look really closely download and (uber-enlarge), you will see chemtrails. Behind that you will see the moon, with the base of the Apollo 11 Lunar module and a blast crater around it. Behind that you will see a sign saying, “Please help me National, I am the best ever candidate since Aaron Gilmore told you he was the best, but in fact he wasn’t”
      And further back you will see Colim McCahon’s painting “I am”

  2. Come on Martyn, I’m not sure he’s any more weird than Minto or Sykes. Or Logie or Delahunty.

    • Am I allowed to say?

      “F#ck off back to your own sycophantic Anonymous NACT pages Instrinsic Value? and peddle your right-wing gob-shite there!”

      If not, I will stand corrected.

  3. An unsettling image if viewed without context, pale, mole face guy in suit, but knowing about Colin Craig it is even weirder. Girly guy but is a kid whacker and likes to cook steak.

    Mark Mitchell is about to find out the true meaning of “take one for the team”.

  4. Ever see ‘ Wild at Heart ‘ ? Willem Dafoe had that look in that motel .
    The truly religious never preach . They just get on with Gods good work . The truly evil use religion as a cloaking device to further their own interests , and those interests are usually to make money baby . Colon Craig is a multimillionaire bible basher right ? We have 285 k hungry Kiwi kids right ? In a country where we have plenty and yet there is hunger and depravation while others are making millions ? Sounds Hellish right ?
    All you fucking Christians out there ? A vote for this freak in a suit is a vote for Satan ( Metaphorically speaking of course . )
    If you want another three years of jonky-stien and his Evil usury interest rates , go ahead . Vote for Grass Boy .
    This dubious God Botherer is as disturbing as the camera has captured him as being . No one sits in grass in a suit . Unless you’re drunk and you fall down there . Or you’re doing weird things to things that live in , on or around the grasses . And no one has a look like that while wearing a suit while flouncing in the grasses . No one !
    Honestly , the guy has snake eyes doesn’t he ?
    Fantastic Post and outstanding photograph .

  5. Oh ! There’s @ Intrinsicvalue . Trying desperately to justify your bribes ?
    John Minto looks like a gentle soul with a huge heart and has repeatedly proven that . Colon Craig is a creep and he has repeatedly proven that .
    You’re terminally stupid and you keep proving that . I have all the proof I need to make an informed vote on the day .

  6. Deep in my heart of hearts, I fear that the 40 percenters will gladly accept Colin Craig as the price they must pay to to have National/Key in power for another three years. The 40 percenters long ago left behind any semblance of rational analysis when it comes to the behaviour of their favourite son. So we could very easily be in for the worst three years of this government yet.

  7. Im focusing on child welfare as a character and morality indicator this election. I would NOT allow this person(a man would not pose)near my children.
    This pose (caught with pants down)is eerie. We need good solid honest men and women from working class backgrounds to reflect and represent nz demographic. 6 years of failed know it all,greedy sanctimonious sellouts buying their way past democratic process has become an inglorious headstone.That a person like this can buy his way into the lives of nz families is all the proof citizens need of the corruption we must fight against with educated and informed vote.
    Thankyou Martin for profiling character behind the facade .

    • And have a look at this one posted on The Standard last Friday.


      It was on the front page of their web-site but has been removed in the last 24hrs or so.

      If you can’t quite read the text below “Son of National” it says:

      Meet Colin Craig, the man who will stop John becoming “Son of Helen.”

      A bunch of psychos?

  8. I might forward this shot to Stephen King I am sure he can find a use for it on a cover of one of his books.
    Yes, it IS that creepy

  9. That photo tells me its going to be very interesting times for National. Either he’s in politics for a gag or he’s one special pussy cat.

    But I am fairly confident a man of his wealth and self belief won’t want to be a Peter Dunne and sit back and do what National whatever tell him to do either, just for being given a seat in parliament.

  10. Am I the only one to see the “Colin is freshly risen, resurrected to be our saviour” undercurrents here? He’s a bit keen on that sort of thing…..suspect it might even be an article of faith?

  11. “Hallo, my name is Colin, I am hot, come lie down in the grass with me, I will convince you, and make you feel oh so comfy”.

    “You can vote for me also, I am hot, I am hot like molten steel, I am the one, the only one, after Jesus came I, and here I am, a prayer or two, and you are right there with me and us.”

    “I will storm ahead, we will win, we will win, we will get the votes, of the baptised and those yet to be baptised, and they will love us, and we will love them, it is all good, and our generous PM John the Faithful Key, he will be convinced, to join the force, as we are the Chosen to “save” New Zealand from the evil doers there are, those on the left side of politics”.


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