Just over a week ago, New Zealanders were struck by the heart-breaking news that Tara Brown, a young Kiwi in her mid-twenties living in Australia, was murdered in particularly brutal fashion allegedly by her ex-partner. Following news of Brown’s death, a number of prominent men in New Zealand or with ties here quickly spoke out. Recording artist Stan Walker, Labour police spokesperson Kelvin Davis, Auckland Mayor Len Brown, and ex-All White Harry Ngata expressed their thoughts on men taking responsibility to end men’s violence against women. This is not a new phenomenon. Male Kiwis have advocated on this issue previously, demonstrating that the struggle against intimate partner violence is not only a “women’s issue.”
The thing is, males cannot openly oppose men’s violence against women only after a tragedy or during the White Ribbon Campaign. It is critical for male celebrities and average Kiwi blokes to serve as allies alongside the many women who lead prevention efforts to end intimate partner violence. But intermittent male voices and role modelling have limited influence.
Brown’s death is hardly an isolated tragedy. It is practically common knowledge amongst Kiwis that international comparisons made in 2011 revealed New Zealand held the highest rates of intimate partner violence among 14 countries under study in the OECD, with 30% of New Zealand women reporting physical victimisation from an intimate partner. We also know that these rates are higher among certain demographic groups, including the indigenous Māori population. As such, this is a systemic problem that has public health consequences and can only be addressed effectively through public policy.
According to Statistics New Zealand, male members of parliament have doubled the number of female members fairly consistently from 1996 to 2014. Likewise, women represent a disproportionately low number of local government members on City Councils, Community Boards, District Councils, and Regional Councils. Politicians hold significant influence in our society, with greater power to legislate proposed laws and construct amendments. Gender disparities in politics is a problem in and of itself, but if our predominantly male government truly cares about women’s health and safety, why don’t our male political representatives step up on this issue, and do so on a more consistent basis?
What can be done? For starters, men’s violence against women is a problem that is learned over time. Boys too often learn that it is normal for males to verbally and physically harm their female partners through what they see in their families or in the media, just as girls too frequently learn to normalise such harm. However, we cannot brush the problem aside simply by saying responsibility falls upon families.
Schools are another institution where virtually all Kiwi children spend a significant amount of their lives. Our government mandates that schools place immense emphasis on maths and literacy, presumably so New Zealand can stay competitive in the global economy. Considering women’s victimisation rates in New Zealand, isn’t women’s safety an equally important concern? It is completely feasible for children and adolescents to begin learning that certain behaviours are inappropriate in intimate relationships, and not just physical violence.
New Zealand’s youth must learn that control over an intimate partner by dictating attire, personal networks and finances is not indicative of a healthy relationship, let alone love. Youth must learn that it is unacceptable to keep an intimate partner in a relationship through intimidation or by manipulating her or his self-esteem. We must also teach our next generation that men’s violence is not merely an individual’s problem connected solely to mental illness or economic frustration, or that can be excused by alcohol consumption.
Battering reflects a cycle of gender-based violence that is learned. And yes, young people must learn how to exit harmful relationships safely, along with how to access resourced support (it appears in addition to having a protection order, Brown requested advice from law enforcement to keep safe after breaking up with her ex-partner and was turned away). But ultimately, boys need to learn that they do not own girls, and that men do not own women.
The tragedy that has impacted Tara Brown and her family may have happened in Australia, but it is tightly connected to New Zealand. If this tragedy can act as a catalyst for change, where men take a greater role in countering intimate partner violence, true change will only happen if men who hold power listen carefully to women who are already leading these campaigns, and subsequently work in collaboration over time to make preventative change on systemic levels.
David Mayeda is a lecturer in the Disciplinary Area of Sociology at The University of Auckland.
Maggie Andrade is a Family Violence Expert with SHINE (Safer Homes in New Zealand Everyday).
What a load of utter rubbish, it is so-called experts like this who have created this violence! Or more correctly allowed the government to create this violence by cuts in jobs, incomes and mental health services. Not just NZ of course, Australia, UK and we’re this neo-liberal hell started in the USA.
I have been studying this ‘industry’ from the darklands for past 13 years I know what is going on and I HAVE HAD ENOUGH of this BS.
Men who kill women because they can’t have them, or for whatever other reason of passion or possession, are mentally ill. I believe ‘paranoia’ is the most dangerous mental health issue in society today and there needs to be mental health services of a standard and resourced to the equivalent of any physical health issue (of all physical health issues).
A man who feels he is becoming violent, or those around him who believe he is becoming violent or will must have somewhere to go to get help. They don’t, and stopping violence services are about 20% effective & don’t fix the problems.
How can people heal and be good people if they are in constant fear of poverty and homelessness. While many people around them have everything they could ever need and love to gloat about it too.
Will be writing to these men, have to try and get through to someone just what the government are withholding from abuse victims – many who go on to lead dysfunctional and violent lives.
Kia kaha to us all
it is sad that on nz’s progressive blog people feel it wouldn’t be helpful for more men to be involved in antiviolence campaigns. people are reducing our high dv rates only to neoliberalism, but that would assume high dv rates didn’t exist here before the 80s which everyone knows isn’t true. it’s just police didn’t take dv seriously then or didn’t record cases. high dv rates were issues with women’s rights campaigns before neoliberalism. heavy patriarchy and violence against women have been around for centuries. neoliberalism doesn’t help, but that’s not the only problem.
If systemic change is needed in New Zealand then we have a problem straight away. Our Prime Minister lacks the guts to come out and say “we want an end to violence against women”. On the contrary, he openly poses with T-shirts proudly proclaiming how great it is that he is a man.
If change is needed to make any progress, then we can start by kicking our pathetic excuse of a prime minister up the arse.
@ JR Murphy .
I agree with you. David Mayeda’s opinion is simplistic and skirts around the real reason for why violence specifically and dysfunction generally is now at epidemic levels in NZ.
It’s simply thirty years of ‘ neoliberalism’ .
The ‘ individualism’ mantra of neo liberalism actually. encourages. people. to become sociopathic to get what they want. Specifically from others, and if that means hurting people in the process then so be it. Our entire society is infected with this concept and its effects cannot be under estimated.
I once asked Judge Jane Farish, in her professional capacity, whether or not she believed that neo liberalism had become a production line for societal dysfunction, crime and violence. She stated categorically . ” Oh yes, absolutely. ”
That was more than ten years ago. Children born at that time are now ten years old. In another ten years some of them will be having children of their own. Will they be better equipped to deal with the tyranny of neo liberalism than their parents based on current patterns developing in thier communities?
It concerns and surprises me that, that entire concept has passed David Mayeda’s criticism .
As for NZ Department of Statistics ? It’s woefully biased in favour of neo liberalism and its associated Greed Culture . It’s so bias in fact that the NZDOS has become a mill house of fiction.
The long list of traitors who promote pro-corporate neo liberalism in New Zealand / Aotearoa ( So they can help themselves to your money ) have the blood of dead women and children on their hands while the violent men, once they realise what they’ve done and who they’ve become,must shoulder the deep and crawling horrors of who they’ve hurt with them for the remainder of their lives. A gift that crooked politicians give that just keeps giving.
The deeply concerning thing for this writer is that they, the pro corporate neo liberals couldn’t give a damn. They just don’t care.
It’s also my view that it should be the focus of pressure groups to seek out those politicians who don’t care and who underfund crisis centres and Govt organisations ( In preference for a flag change @ $ 28 million for example ) and remove them from our offices. By force if necessary because they’re simply not doing the job we pay them to do. And that is to take care of us, to manage our resources and to promote peace and harmony withon our democracy. It’s that simple.
“If one is forever cautious, can one remain a human being? ”
― Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn
While I’m no God botherer, think roger douglas and bryce wilkinson.
In keeping silent about evil, in burying it so deep within us that no sign of it appears on the surface, we are implanting it, and it will rise up a thousand fold in the future. When we neither punish nor reproach evildoers, we are not simply protecting their trivial old age, we are thereby ripping the foundations of justice from beneath new generations.”
― Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn, The Gulag Archipelago 1918-1956
Deprivation in the lower socio-economic sectors of society are a major factor ie lack of money and unemployment although the Natz will deny this.
Also the P drug and alcohol are contributing factors I believe. Tara Brown’s partner was a member of the Bandidos gang I believe who actively trade in illicit drugs so this may have been a contributing factor?
I think both men and women need to take an active effort against family violence. It shouldn’t be a mudslidging “men need to do more” “women need to do more” campaign, it needs to be inclusive to have any hope of success.
That is not to say that men don’t need to take a good look at themselves, because we certainly do. But we all know how pointing the blame at one gender works, it doesn’t.
Unfortunately, despite the many great efforts of advertising, the message is not getting through. I have no great ideas of how to change the culture here. I must say that New Zealands alcohol addiction is staggeringly awful at times. I understand youngsters getting three sheets to the wind, but for grown adults to have to rely on having a good knees-up every weekend to ‘have fun’ cannot be healthy for the country, and certianly not for domestic violence.
Agree that the issue of alcohol is an important one.
The death Lesley Gore recently found me listening to what is, in my opinion, one of her greatest songs.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDUjeR01wnU
Even today there is an issue of ownership of girls and women, which this song reminds us restricts the freedom of females.
And then we have leaders like Hone, employing [Enough, already Jollo. You have made this point over and over again. I don’t want to see it again and if I do, it will be viewed as trolling. – ScarletMod]
as his right hand man….
it’s sad to see commenters on nz’s progressive blog disagreeing it would be helpful for more men to support anti-violence campaigns, or thinking men’s larger involvement wouldn’t matter. assuming high dv rates in nz are reduced to neoliberalism would have to assume high dv rates didn’t exist here before the 80s. that’s not true. everyone knows that. in fact women fought to have police take dv seriously around that time because dv was already at epidemic rates. it’s just police weren’t obligated to record it. neoliberal policies don’t help, but patriarchy and high dv rates have been in nz for many many decades.
You argument might have more impact if you tried some punctuation. Not trying to be funny. When trying to get a message across it pays to look like you care enough to use the caps key when typing your message.
Thank you for pointing out me not capitalizing. Do you have any substantive comments on the content? Or do you just want to have impact playing the “punctuation police?”
it is sad that on nz’s progressive blog commenters feel it wouldn’t be helpful for more men to be involved in anti-violence campaigns. people are reducing our high dv rates only to neoliberalism, but that would assume high dv rates didn’t exist here before the 80s which everyone knows isn’t true. it’s just police didn’t take dv seriously then or didn’t record cases. high dv rates were issues with women’s rights campaigns before neoliberalism. heavy patriarchy and violence against women have been around for centuries. neoliberalism doesn’t help, but that’s not the only problem.
it is sad that on nz’s progressive blog people feel it wouldn’t be helpful for more men to be involved in anti-violence campaigns. people are reducing our high dv rates only to neoliberalism, but that would assume high dv rates didn’t exist here before the 80s which everyone knows isn’t true. it’s just police didn’t take dv seriously then or didn’t record cases. high dv rates were issues with women’s rights campaigns before neoliberalism. heavy patriarchy and violence against women have been around for centuries. neoliberalism doesn’t help, but that’s not the only problem.
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